15 Months since my 18 yr old left this world 9/10/2012
Andrew was a caring & loving young man. Andrew had such a big heart. He was the type of person, he was always a people pleaser. Andrew just finished High School. He was deciding what he wanted to do, as he always talked about going into the medical field.
Everything changed on September 9,2012. It was a Sunday afternoon and I was trying to get in touch with Andrew. I called his cell phone numerous times, I knew in my heart something was wrong. Finally, I received a call from a friend of Andrew's... Asking if I were still looking for him? She then proceeded to tell me that I would be able to find my son at Wal mart. I thought why, why would he be at Wal-Mart? My husband and I went up to where he was. I walked up to a his car, as he was laying lifeless, eyes rolling into his head. I immediately called 911. I at this point was not sure what was going on.. Once I was able to get my son out of his car. I was mortified, I had so many why's running thru my head. Andrew did get transported to a hospital where they specialized in drugs and alcohol and must of all Mental Health. Andrew needed 2 of these things. (1) being he was very depressed and (2) he had a history with other drug abuse.
Once we arrived at the Hospital, they took my son vitals- Andrew's blood pressure was so high, pulse also was high. He even seemed to look blue around his lips. I kept questioning why would you make my son sit in the waiting room when he needed medical attention. He sat there next to me in a blank stare. He did tell me I'm just depressed, I already did know that because Andrew's medical Dr. already had him on depression meds. He said that he needs help. Everything changed when we met this Dr. in the Emergency room. He came into the room that they finally called Andrew back. The doctor came in introduced himself as the ER intern- DO.
He never ordered any blood work, x-rays, etc. I asked the Doctor, are you going to check Andrews lungs, being that you can plainly see he looks blue. also his blood pressure is high. He then just ignored me and said Andrew is an adult so he would have to talk to him. The Doctor proceeded to ask Andrew questions and Andrew said that he wanted to come in the hospital willingly because he needed help. The had a Doctor quickly turned and said to Andrew, I feel there is no reason to keep you in the hospital- only being the type of thing you were doing leaves your body as fast as you take it in. I then began to argue with the Dr. And the Doctor said if I admit him in the hospital and I feel there is nothing I can medically treat him...he will be responsible for all medical bills. ( Keep in mind, we had excellent health and hospital coverage.) Well, Andrew was released
from the hospital. We took him home. Andrew was very pale and was very sick to his stomach. He went to bed,by morning he was still sick. His face had a gray look to it. I asked him if I could make him some breakfast, he replied with a no. I did it anyway. I decided to make him a poached eggs. Andrew did eat them, he then turned and said "ma" I never realized 2 eggs could fill you up like these eggs did today". I said are you still hungry? He, replied- "no". I then had a phone call from my daughter whom needed picked up from school. I asked Andrew to take a ride with me, he said "no, if I do anything, it will be to take a walk and clear my head" I said please stay home. I had to leave and when I came home Andrew was gone. I had this horrible sick feeling, By 4:20 that day, I received a call saying my son was found in the creek down the street from my house, he was laying face down. He passed. I am so angry. I feel everyone failed my son, including myself. My son needed help and no one would do anything for him. I have so much un-easiness everyday. I live in the should of's, would-a coulda's . My life has for ever changed. Andrew died less then 19hrs of trying to get admitted into help at the hospital. Our life have forever changed. Christmas is approaching and I have no energy. I feel lost, I cant function, I put no tree up. My world seems so lonely. I get so much anxiety when the thought of Andrew never being with us will forever torture us. I am waiting for him to come thru-the door. I can not except that I failed you. I was supposed to protect you and I let this Dr. Neglect you. I will never forgive myself or will I ever get over this. I play this over and over every day. I will never stop loving you Andrew!