1st Dinner out by myself ~
by Patricia
My 50th Birthday Dinner ~
But thing I started thinking and then after a few moments I thought maybe I'll get it to go but you know soup and salad is better eaten at the restaurant. Cold soup and warm salad didn't sound appealing. I parked, took a big breath and walked in. I sat in the bar area and I had my Kindle so I thought no problem. Read a little and have a nice dinner. I was OK, kind of weird not having someone to look across the table but I was reading. No problem. I also had a glass of wine. I finished, paid the check and when I was waiting for my leftovers to be bagged it hit me. Alone, Alone, Alone ~ oh dear god, please don't let me start crying in the restaurant. I thanked the server, made my exit and still managed to say good-bye to the hostess in one swift move toward the door. I was safe in the car ~ the tears came ~ I was sad I was eating alone, my first out but I still did it. So, I told myself, good job ~ 1 small step for me. I know Billy would be shaking his head and being going What? What? What's the problem??? My first thought was to run into the house and get on the computer and let you all know what I did. We have difficult times and the sadness can be overwhelming but there are rays of light, the load sometimes a little easier ~ I consider everybody here my support group and friends. So Guess What Friend ~ I did it.... Always, 1 step, 1 breath at a time
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