29 Year Love

by Nichelle Lewis-Harper
(Atlanta, GA)

Wedded Bliss

Wedded Bliss

I met my husband when I was 12 years old and he was 13. He always made me laugh. We talked on the phone until the early morning hours almost every day. We remained friends through his 2 previous marriages. I have loved him since 1981.

We were married in 2007 and he cried during his vows. I never thought I would get married. But there I was with the man I had measured every other man in my life since him. He consumed at least 48oz. of beer every day. He had been to the hospital a couple of years ago and was given a few options on what would happen if he continued to drink hard liquor vs. not at all.

He continued to drink. I was constantly telling him he was killing himself over the past 5 years. A lot of arguing and fights about alcohol. His belief was, he would out live all of us (concerned friends and family). He bet me that he would. Well on February 15, 2010 he lost that bet.

What do I win? A gaping hole in my heart, constant tears, weeping at any given moment. I don't want to be the winner. I know I could not have done any more than I did, but I still blame myself. This is unreal. I believe in God, and know that he has a plan. But at this moment I cannot get with the plan. This sucks!

I miss my husband! We were planning a vow renewal in 2011 because all our family and friends were not there when we got married. We had a civil ceremony with no time to get everyone there. Now I am receiving emails and reminders about a ceremony that will never take place.

Now what? I pray for continued strength and peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comments for 29 Year Love

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Mar 09, 2010
Sorry for your loss
by: Lisa

Sorry for your loss, I know what it is like to lose someone who will not stop drinking. I lost my finacee' on Jan 31, 2010 due to liver problems. We were suppose to get married on Feb 14, 2010 but that didn't happen.

I cry every day and I agree with you that God does have a plan for us all and right now it does suck, but my faith is what is keeping me going and the love of family and friends. His family has been such a great help to me and I know that one day I will be with him. So keep you memories close to your heart and keep in mind one day you two will be reunited again.

Mar 06, 2010
29 yr love
by: Anonymous

I aM sorry for your loss. I know what it is to love someone who refuses to stop drinking. Hang in there. We are meant to grieve and grow.

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