4 months

by Dawn
(Hong kong)

It will be 4 months dad has gone. I did some post before. What I worried most is my mum. In fact, I am so proud of her. She is griefing dad in her own way. By reading some others posts, I can imagine how difficult for her right now, though I can't feel 100% how she feels. Maybe she did cry alone in bed at night. Maybe she is thinking about him every moment. But I know she is going through her griefing at her way. I took her for dinner last night. Just the mother n daughter time. She picked a steakhouse. After we sat down, she told me she wanted to go with dad before but dad said it's too pricy n they didn't go even they were outside the restaurant n reading the menu already. I can't control my tears already. I asked her if she wanted to change the restaurant. She said no . She said it'd just like dad has already taken her here coz I was with her. She did cry when she telling me. But throughout the dinner, she can still chit chat w me. Talking about dad, talking about my brothers, sharing what she did in past few days n what she is going to do in coming days. I know it's a long way to go for her. Hope dad is watching us n give us strength upside there
Dawn

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Jun 24, 2011
4 months
by:

Dawn,

You are such a wonderful thoughtful daughter. I know that you want to help your mom through grief. The main thing is not to force her to grieve but to allow her to talk about your dad her husband when she wants. To let her speak in her own time just be there for her.

One of the worst things about grieving is the fact that people do not want to listen to the broken record that we all play. People think that we should move on. We all ask how we do that but in the end it is a gradual process.

We just want to be able to talk of our loved ones without feeling that the person who we are talking to are hitting the mute button.

Thank you for being there for your mom and of course my best to you as you travel this long road of grief and eventual acceptance.
HH

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