4 years and still in pain...

by Carolyn

My dad was my"stepdad" but he was my daddy. He chose to love me and be my daddy when I was 3 years old when I thought my biological father rejected me. I never had a relationship with my biological father. However, my "stepdad" became my daddy at 3 years old. He was my bestest friend. He used to tell me that he not only loved me but he also liked me. I have never really been close to my siblings for whatever reason. He used to tell me not to let them get me down. He was the one person in my life that could make everything seem alright. I could call him and he would know just what to say. Now it seems that I am so alone. There doesn't seem to be anyone I can talk to like I could talk to him. My mom still alive and I love her very much, but my daddy knew what to say and help me keep it together. Now it feels like for 4 years everything has fallen apart and I don't know how to pick up the pieces. He died the morning of Dec 16th 2008. When I woke up that morning, before I found out he had died, I felt like someone was ripping out a part of my soul. I have never been the same since. I tried to go on with life, but realize today that all this time I was denying how much I really miss him and how much it still hurts. I need him still.

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May 08, 2013
4 years and still in pain.....
by: Doreen U.K

Carolyn You need to talk to someone about how you feel so that you can Heal and move forward otherwise you will stay this hurt for longer than you need to.
Counselling does help if you get the right person. 4yrs. is too long to still feel so hurt that it is affecting your life and you can't move forward. Try and tell your mom how you feel and see if she can support you in the way you need. It is one of the most painful elements of living when one loses a close bond with a parent and they feel so lost and unable to move on in life. Growth becomes stunted and Life stops for a while. Keeping a journal and writing out all your feelings does help and is therapeutic, but I found out that there is no substitute than talking one to one with someone who is skilled and able to help you move forward in life and live a life that has meaning and value.

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