5 people less

by Leah
(New Jersey)

On July 3 2013 my mom passed away suddenly and unexpectedly at 56 of a stroke and heart attack. One minute we were talking on the phone- I cancelled plans with her THAT DAY to pick up an extra shift ( which I whole heartedly regret) and the next minute my brother was calling in hysterics and said she died. Boom. Just like that my mom was gone. I'm only 25 and Just the thought of never seeing my mother again in this life makes my chest tight and I find it hard to breathe. In August 2013 my grandfather (her father) lost his battle to stage 4 lung cancer. My best friends uncle passed away from cancer in October 2013 along with a close friend of the family who also succumbed to cancer in October. So much loss in such a short amount of time. So much sadness was in the air that the only thing to escape that was to sleep. On June 5th 2014 just a few weeks ago my grandmother ( fathers mom) passed away at 95. I loved her more than anything in this world. She was my all and now she's not here. I took care of her the last 3 years almost everyday and now I'm finding it hard to get through the day without seeing her.

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Jun 25, 2014
I know how you feel: read addictions hurt everyone
by: Joanna

I'm very sorry for your losses. Your only twenty five and out of no where you just lose so many loved ones, especially your mother. Losing someone is hard, but it's even harder when you never even suspect it's coming, due to old age or a terminal illness. But regardless how you lost the family member doesn't matter. You still feel that emptiness, that hole in your heart. Something is missing and I completely understand. Time is all that will help you heal, and that doesn't mean you forget or you aren't sad. It just means to move on and think about the memories and the good times you have had with them. You can keep their memory alive through your thoughts. I recently just wrote in the multiple losses section that addictions hurt everyone. I'm 24 and 4 months ago lost my father unexpectedly on his 60th birthday, ultimately due to alcohol. And then just one month ago, I lost my 33 year old brother, also a huge surprise. He overdosed on heroin. The toxicology just came back today and it was the heroin that did it got him. It's hard because we thought he was clean, than I get that devastating phone call once again just two months after my father died. Death hurts, and all we can do is heal. I'm not religious but just recently I started looking up near death experiences. I need something to bring my faith back, to know my brother and father are out of their misery, and pain. Hang in there. You can read my story too, just a few stories down from yours. Take care of yourself.

Jun 23, 2014
5 people less
by: Doreen UK

Leah I am sorry for your loss of your Mom and other people from your life. Just all of a sudden we will be living our lives and suddenly have bad news that leaves us grief stricken for a long time. Worse still if we lose our loved ones one after the other not getting the chance to process and grieve each loss. A sudden death is much harder to bear because you get no warning or preparation for this loss.
I lost my husband of 44yrs. to lung cancer 2yrs. ago. Four years into our marriage his cancer started growing in his lungs from asbestos fibres he inhaled from the workplace. His cancer grew for 40yrs. I call it the silent killer. No warning and no test to detect this terminal cancer that grows in the lining of the lung and is incurable, and inoperable. I nursed him for just over 3yrs. He was 65yrs. Life has little meaning now. Days come and go but there will never be any quality of life ever again. I just go through the motions of each day.
You will struggle with grief as we all do but we know that there comes a day when that raw grief pain will have to heal.

Jun 21, 2014
Dear Leah,
by: Anonymous

You have my deepest sympathy and I understand your pain. My father died from Cardiac Arrest in January, 2013. One minute he was here, then he was gone. In an instant everything changed. I am so sorry that you are struggling with your grief, and I wish you comfort and peace as you continue to heal. Barb

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