5 years.........

by bittersweet

It has been five years since my husband died. I believe I wrote on this site ages ago when I was in the beginnings of grief. I am now exhausted, angry, and just want to keep to myself. I don't really know how to put things into words for how I am feeling. my whole lifestyle has changed and I hate it. Everyday is a misery. the weekends come and I do nothing because I am so worn out with working all week. I don't know what to do.

Comments for 5 years.........

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Oct 12, 2013
thought i was doing good...
by: Anonymous

My husband died 12-27-08. I honestly do not remember the first year or so after, but I kept so busy. I started to feel ok late 2010 into 2011. I made a move to a new city thinking it would help. I still think about him every single day. I made a new life and even started dating. Recently I have been tearful at the thought of him and things we shared. I want so much for this feeling to go away. I have a new relationship that I feel is not as it should because of this.

Apr 02, 2013
by: CATE

I lost my husband five years ago when he died tragically in an accident. We had the most wonderful, and happy loving marriage of 22 years. My life now is just an empty, pointless existance without him, he was also my best friend. I miss his laughter, his love and his protection. Friends tell me, that I will always have the wonderful memories and of course this is true,but it's the happy memories that hurt the most. He was only 43 years old. A few months ago I caught the ending of some old, roamntic movie as the parting lovers were saying good bye. I heard the woman say.''Maybe all that we were, was all we were meant to be'' These words from the screen actress pierced my heart ... was this sentiment also true for me? I think it is.

Feb 25, 2011
Just angry at life now
by: Bittersweet

There are days that bring my husband to mind and I think about our life as it once was and the deep ache is always there. I went through the shock and walked around in a fog, I also went through the "I can do everything" stage but felt overwhelmed. Lately , I am miserable at how everything has changed for me. I guess I just don't enjoy anything anymore cause I am so exhausted trying to survive. I feel blessed that the Lord has watched over me...just angry with where I am right now in life.

Feb 20, 2011

Bittersweet, Did you stop coming here because it stopped helping or because you thought you had done your full run with grief? If you are still grieving, yes seek couseling etc. Let it out. How has your life changed? What do you hate about it? Is it the fact that you can no longer share it with him. Is it because of what grief caused you to become? We are here, talk to us...

Feb 20, 2011
Me TOO???
by: TrishJ

As I read your post ~ I wonder if I will feel the same in four years and 9 months. It's almost three months since my husband died. I'm just sort of existing. I was in a total state of shock for 60 days. Now the reality is settling in and it sucks. We were married for 35 years. I don't feel like I want to be angry just yet.....but I know that will come. Why should I (at the age of 58) have to face the rest of my life without my soul mate? Why do all of my friends still have their husbands? I come from a family of long lives (well into their 90s). I don't want live 35 more years without my husband.

I keep thinking I'm making progress but I really don't want to venture into a life without him. I have no idea where God will lead me but I have no desire to be in a life without Joe right now.
I hope you find some joy in this day, knowing that others care and are going through your exact situation. Blessings to you.

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