A brother gone but never forgotten

My brother was 50 years when he decided he no longer could live with pain and depression. I really don't remember him ever being happy, he was all alone or so he thought. He was going to allow me to help him that was our plan, however he had a different one. When he stood me up for his doctors appointment I wasn't too concerned this was not unusual but when he didn't return my calls and text I became very anxious. The police confirmed what my intuition had already told me. He was a good person, I loved him. I'm so sad for him he was 50 and had a life to live. Please no judgement. Tell your sisters and brothers you love them.

Comments for A brother gone but never forgotten

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Jul 07, 2014
A brother gone but never forgotten
by: Doreen UK

I am sorry for your loss of your brother to a sudden death. DEPRESSION is one of the most painful and difficult illnesses to live with. It affects our mental and emotional health and is hard to understand and recover from if ever. My nephew at age 30yrs. could not live in his world of depression anymore and 9yrs. ago threw himself in front of an express train. He is gone but never forgotten.
Living and supporting a person with depression is very difficult and could seriously affect the lives of the family. I suffered depression for 40yrs. and then reached rock bottom and was fortunate to see an excellent psychologist/counsellor who worked with me and helped me resolve my losses. In 4yrs. I got my life back in ways I had never known and lived for the first time in my late 40's. I was able to relate in a way which benefited my family and they healed from my interaction with them which was very positive and supportive. I then went on to give 8yrs. in voluntary work to mental health in Admin and client support. I developed skills that I can use now and gave me confidence. I am drawn in support of those with depression because I understand their world and how it becomes difficult and often impossible to live with this illness. My world was the same. I was suicidal also but got good support in time. I spent most of my life crying inside and not knowing why?. Often many people are hurt as children and grow into unhappy adults who never were able to resolve their sadness and depression. Most benefit from one to one counselling. Using the technique of dealing with the "child within." This is a specialised area and only professionally trained people can help many who suffer in this area of being wounded as a child. Counselling and therapy were once stigmatised and judged. But understood more now.
I feel sad for the many people who are not helped and supported and fall through the net and feel so hopeless they see no point in going on. I understand their world and how they feel and many could have been helped and go on to live fuller lives, knowing happiness for the first time as I did. Only doing it alone as I lost my husband of 44yrs. to cancer 2yrs. ago.
I hope you feel less alone knowing that many people endure what your brother did and understand. But I am sorry for your loss of your sibling.

Jul 07, 2014
I am so sorry....
by: Lynn (Willis, VA)

I lost my brother John on December 22, 2013 -- they think he passed with a heart attack - he was 54 and so full of life. I understand that pain of losing a brother -- I miss him so much. I miss talking to him more than anything and those big bear hugs.

I am so sorry for your pain. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. I pray God will give you peace. Can you see if there is a support group near you? Just to be able to reach out and be with others who have experienced the same thing or felt a loss.

I try very hard to stay busy and to keep in touch with John's wife. We don't live close to each other and they didn't have children. I worry so about her -- her heart is broken.

Love and prayers......

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