Hope ~ you hit it on the head. I must try to heal myself from within before I could ever let anyone in. I feel so cheated...I have to remind myself daily that I should be thankful for the love of a great man I had for so long. Being the first of my circle of friends to lose their spouse I'm taking daily notes so that I can walk them through it when the times come.....and it will come. To Hope, Jen, Judy, Jules, Donna, Patricia....ALL the strong women on this site who have lost their loves....YOU TRULY INSPIRE ME.
the suns shins again... by: HH
Jen,
I just came back from wally world and the sun was shining, I was smiling it is a beautiful day. Not long ago I frowned good weather, How dare it be beautiful without my Love to share it with!
Bad days suited my personality stormy, cloudy with a chance of bitchiness. We were searching for happiness unable to attain it stuck in grief, because grief had become a way of life. There seemed no way out of it climbing out of a hole with nothing to hold onto but past memories.
I am glad that you have turned a corner, I have too. Still, for me I must learn to be content and happy within myself before I can let anyone in. I am still trying to find out who I am. I have not been alone in...whoa 30years? One bad marriage and one good one that ended not in divorce but death did us part.
I no longer feel that I died with him a part of me withered away but is trying to grow to make me the best of myself that I can be. I was Hope once and will be again. Until then let our past be part of who we are not define what we will be. It is easier to stop living and stop caring. But we do deserve more and I want it for us and everyone here who has gone to hell riding the grief ride. All me best always... Hope
