After the First Year
by Rose L.
(St. Louis, MO)
My Angel #1 has been in Heaven a year now. She joined God on Feb. 10, 2011. It still feels like yesterday, in terms of grief time and missing her. But as I watch her children and see how they have grown and changed from carefree little grand-angels to struggling children and then to semi-adjusting kids, I have to thank God that He has it under control. Somehow, He allows kids resilience. Although, I feel much of their pain is silent. I believe they hold a lot inside, where we grown-ups can't see it. That bothers me because I can't fix it.
I am not God-I can only do what Grandma's do..My son-in-law is amazing. He is a son I am so proud of, always was, but now he has blossomed and grown into this man of faith and love and beauty. I am grateful he includes me in the kids' lives so much, it is part of my journey. Bless him.
For me, this has been a year! I will say this in all honesty. I am doing more real grieving this year. I think I am feeling more of the loss of my Shanny. Her smile, her sweetness, her God-given gifts of humor and silliness..how I miss that silliness!
But in her honor, I continue to grow, to learn to share and always-to pray!