About seven weeks ago we lost two-long time family friends who were like parents to us. They died within a few days of each other. Last week the father of one of my dearest friends died and at the same moment my cat fell seriously ill. Today I found out that my mother may have leukemia. In addition, our landlord whom we love just got diagnosed with inoperable spine cancer.
One after the other, one after the other in seven weeks. Last night I'd prayed to God to not send more illnesses and/or deaths into my life. I thought the stream of bad luck was over. Then I get this call from my mother to tell me about the leukemia possibility.
Believing that something is going on in the universe, God is doing this for a reason, I spoke to a friend who said that there is indeed something going on, she knows a number of people who are getting very ill and dying lately. We both agreed that this will probably continue.
That's where I'm at. I want to know what the going on. I don't want to think of my mother having leukemia.
My mindset from this chain of events is taking away from work I need to get done. I'm in shock and confused. I believe that God is doing this on purpose to me, and no one will dare tell me otherwise. I mean that in a possibly positive way, he's trying to teach me something for example. I pray that the people I love will be well, I have thoughts about what it will be like at their funeral and suddenly they get sick or die-- that is the pattern of the last couple of months.
I feel like a victim and not in control of my life. Because I know losses and deaths can take over one's life. My future is uncertain.