An officer and a gentleman

by Deb Wooldridge
(England)

I was raised as an RAF child in Germany, and although having a high disciplined up-bringing, my dad was always loved and respected by my brother and myself. I always new that I could rely on him and that he was someone to be counted on. He died in November 2012 and I miss him so much, tears are forming as I write these words. Goodbye dad. X

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Dec 30, 2012
An officer and a gentleman
by: Doreen U.K.

Deb I am sorry for your loss of your dad. I lost my husband of 44yrs. 8 months ago and also in the path of sorrow and grief. My 3 Adult Children lost their father and their grief is different to mine but nevertheless such a difficult time for an Adult child to lose their father. I lost my mother at 77yrs. 9 years ago and my father is still alive at 91yrs. He is disabled and looked after by younger sister, and his quality of life is so poor that he was ready to die years ago.
Life is so strange. Couples and families that are happy lose their loved ones and struggle with the death, whilst my father is struggling with life and how difficult it is for him.
My husband died a slow painful death with a deadly Industrial cancer and wanted to Live. I had to watch the painful face of a man trying to hold onto life and suffering the agony of a slow death. WE are never ready to lose our loved ones. When my father dies I will be sad and miss him. But I won't be devastated due to his age and his medical condition. 91yrs. is a very accepting age for one to die. I wish that everyone was guaranteed to live past 80yrs. this would be kinder to families. WE would not be so hurt by our grief. You will hurt for some time as grief happens when we least expect it. I could cry on the bus or on the street, or the supermarket. Grief is no respecter of time or place. But crying is the biggest part of grieving and where our Healing comes from. I hope that in the days and weeks ahead that you will be able to move forward from your loss. If you find yourself struggling try out a grief counsellor who is trained to support you in the best way. You will move forward quicker.

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