Another Dream; Another Realization

by KH
(Idaho)

I had a dream the other night. I was having car troubles, I called to let my mom (HH) know that I was going to be late because of my car; but my dad answered the phone. He said, "Are you here?" And I said, "No, daddy, my car is giving me trouble, but I'll leave now. I'll be right there." I rushed to my car, not caring one bit if there was something serious wrong with it, so I could get home to see my dad. I got there and H was there, and so was my brother, but no dad. I was so confused, trying to piece things together, but it was as if nothing happened or nothing was going on. Like things were just normal... I was so upset after this dream. I thought to myself, "WHY? Why would I have such a dream where I couldn't even arrive in time to see him? This isn't fair!"

And it came to me. It hit me so plainly. I talked to my dad the day before he died; and when I got home he wasn't there. Even in my dream, my plan to come home was too late to see my dad. I don't think all of me got over that fact. I don't think any of us did. My dad was such a selfless man he wouldn't even let us know that this particular day was the day- and he knew it. He spared us, but I think part of me is angry that it happened that way. I felt so cheated out of seeing my dad. It's a good realization though. It's good to find out why you have the dreams you have and what they mean. This will only help me grow.

I battle accepting what happened everyday, sometimes without realizing that I do. I hope we all realize a little something each time that we have a flash of memory or a dream of our loved one and understanding that this is an everyday battle, but on some days it is the easiest of battles and those days, the days you don't remember battling as hard as the rest are the days you know you'll survive. I hope we can all grow a little bit more each day into being okay. Because if anything, being okay will be more than good enough for those who've experienced a loss.

Comments for Another Dream; Another Realization

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Apr 30, 2011
learning from our dreams
by: Hope

KH,

I beg to dream of your dad as he was. Before the surgery/stroke etc. I have my nightmares too.
I think that dreams help us work through some things unresolved in our conscious minds that we cannot fathom or bring closure to.

We must live our lives the best we can. Making him and ourselves proud of all that he taught us and the joy that he brought into our lives. He is still watching over us. I know that I can feel it in my heart. Family was everything to him. He is so proud of you and I am too. You have blossomed into a wonderful young lady.

If I could pick a daughter, I would pick you. But destiny brought you and your dad to me and for that I will be eternally grateful.
XOXOXOHH

Apr 27, 2011
What a Great Post!!
by: Dakota Blues

...the days you don't remember battling as hard as the rest are the days you know you'll survive. I hope we can all grow a little bit more each day into being okay. Because if anything, being okay will be more than good enough for those who've experienced a loss...

I love this line. My step-father passed away in 2005 and my bio-dad this past fall. My daughter passed away 3 years ago and her death now 'trumps' any family death I so far have journeyed through.

I didn't have a fathers true love so it is beautiful to read the comments from those who did. "Grow a little bit more each day into being OKAY." Your love relationship with your father is simply...beautiful! Cling tightly to those memories of love!!! Hugs~

Apr 27, 2011
My Daughter Had a Dream
by: TrishJ

KH~
I was very worried about my daughter after the death of her dad. Everyone always said she was the female version of him. She kept her feelings in and didn't even want me to mention her dad after the funeral was over.
My friend told me to get a book called Talking to Heaven. I was really having trouble in adjusting to my husband's death and really started doubting that he was still here with us in spirit. In the book I learned various ways of the spirit world communicating with us. Of course I was skeptical, to say the leas,t at the thought of it.
Several weeks after finishing the book we had a family night out. We were at Buffalo Wild Wings and my daughter blurted out, "Mom, did I tell you about my phone call from dad?" I think I froze on the spot. There was a chapter in the book about people who have passed communicating with loved ones through "phone calls." She said, "Oh you think it's BS just like everyone else I've told." I said, "NO~quite the opposite. I totally believe it happened."
My son later said that he thought his dad came to his sister because she needed it the most. I think so too!
I know some feel it was only a dream but I think your dad was trying to communicate with you that he loved you (always will) and for you not to feel bad about not being there on the day he died. He would want you to be happy and not have any guilt (which can consume us). The love goes on forever even though they aren't with us in physical form any longer.
I hope your "dream" brought you the same comfort it brought my daughter. God bless.
PJ

Apr 27, 2011
Another dream
by: M Mack

KH,

I'm so glad you feel some closure over not seeing your dad before he died. I really believe it was faith, you were spared, not ready to witness his death. The Lord works in mysterious ways and this is a sign that you were not meant to be bedside. So please don't beat yourself up because you didn't make it in time. Circumstances presented the right scenario for you that day for a reason and your mom was chosen to take the blow for you.

Live, love and smile knowing your dad is with you now and always will be. Continue healing and I hope you find comfort knowing that your dad doesn't want you to be guilty for anything. Take care and you have my prayers for peace and a blessed life.

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