Baby Boy

by Baby Boy
(Savannah Ga. USA)

My mother was my friend, counselor, comforter, and many other things in my life. One and a half weeks after she went into the hospital we found that she had terminal recurrent cancer and only had a short time to live. She called her children to her bedside and made her final request. Take care of one another. We felt the pain of loss from that moment. Three days later she was gone. Honestly I don't know what I'm feeling. I feel lost without her. I know I will see her again one day and know she would want me to hold steadfast to my faith. I have tried to be strong for my family but I feel there is a well of emotions stirring up in me waiting to burst fourth. I have helped others get through the lost of love ones but find myself stuck in time. I'm grateful that I tried my very best to make her proud while at the same time feeling it was insufficient for the gift she gave me. The gift of being a loving, caring, wonderful mother. The rest of my life I will look back at the day I truly lost one of the most important people in my life. My mother. I will love you forever and miss you from the bottom of my heart. Mommy. Your baby boy.

Comments for Baby Boy

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Jun 12, 2013
by: Baby Boy

Today my mother would have celebrated her birthday. She passed just a few weeks short of it. For the first time since her funeral i went to the grave yard. I recognize her physical body cannot hear me. But in some way I was able to pour my heart out and cry from the depths of my soul. I actually feel better today than I have since she passed. Many have suggested I needed to get that cry out but I was holding on trying to be the strong one. Oddly enough I feel stronger since I visited her grave and cried until I had no more tears. I have began the process of healing now. I know there are more tears to come but there are better days ahead. Happy Birthday mommy. I miss u so much. Love your baby boy.

Jun 08, 2013
by: Baby Boy

Thank you all for your responses. It is comforting to express and know your not alone. A part that I omitted in my initial story is the week before my mother passed we were in the hospital with my brother who was diagnosed with inoperable throat cancer. At one point he and my mother were on the same floor. He was released from the hospital the day after she arrived and began chemotherapy and radiation. So our journey is far from over. Im a man of faith but it's so hard having lost one love one and the fear of loosing another is my worst nightmare. I would never share this with my family because I'm supposed to be the one who hold everything together but I never prepared myself or even thought I would have to face life and death subjects of this magnitude so quickly. So I pray constantly and put on a calm face but inside I fear our journey with death is not over. Odly enough my brother appears resolute and taking everything in stride. I have a new respect for him and a greater love having just lost our mother. Thank you all for your responses.

Jun 07, 2013
the loss of your mom----baby boy
by: Anonymous

Doreen is right in all she said---God gave us tears for a purpose in joy and sorrow. We must cry and get the emotions out that come with them. Some people think I am doing better on my road of grief in the loss of my dear husband of 43 yrs. However, they do not see me in the quiet private times in my home, in my car and when I sit outside where my husband loved to be looking at God's beautiful earth. They do not see me on my knees crying and begging God for help, peace and comfort in my darkest sorrow. But, God gives a way for me to begin again and to be smiling for my kids and my grand kids. He gives me strength to face the day and to go on as my husband would want me to. Your mom would want you to cry and get your sorrow out and then to begin again to be the strong man she raised you up to be. Look to God for strength for the minutes and don't look ahead to the weeks or months. God will take care of you. I am so sorry for your loss- God Bless You

Jun 07, 2013
Baby Boy
by: Doreen U.K.

I am sorry for your loss of your mom to cancer. I just lost my husband to cancer 13 months ago and know only too well the pain of this cancer journey and the loss of a loved one. I lost my mom 10yrs. ago and only just now grieving this loss at the same time as losing my husband.
My husband said the same thing. "Take care of each other." I cared for my husband for over 3yrs. and it was a horrendous cancer journey it was prolonged with painful memories. I am a mother and moms give love and care for their families expecting nothing in return. It is so easy to support and care for other's but when we are grieving it is harder to cope with. You need to take time to grieve otherwise it will catch up with you later and feel worse. Just cry all you need to this is the largest part of grief. you need to express this freely. It is only time that will Heal us all from our grief. But the journey is long and painful. Take only one day at a time and get through this as best as you can. Stay close as a family as this is important and will get you through many a difficulty. This is how we as a family coped. But also there may be a shift here where some family members will become closer and some move away from us. Grief affects us all differently. Be prepared for this should it happen. I hope you have better days ahead. There will be good days in between those bad days. We don't get them all at once. I hope you will be comforted in your grief and sorrow.

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