Bad things happen in threes
(West Sacramento, CA)
I want to start by saying that I have been a mother to two beautiful children. A little over three years ago, I had the wonderful chance to be a mother for a third time, but it was not meant to be. I had a doctor's appointment to hear my baby's heartbeat, but there was no heartbeat. My doctor said that I had developed a rare condition and my baby had died but my body thought I was still pregnant. That was right before mother's day. A week later, I went in to have the baby removed. I told my boyfriend at the time that at least I still had my two children and we could always try again later. That next weekend, the four of us decided to go to Yosemite national park to get away because I was not taking the loss of our unborn baby well. We were about halfway to Yosemite when tragedy struck. A man who was in a hurry decided to pass a car upon approaching a large hill, the same hill we were approaching from the other side. The man was driving at an excessive speed and slammed head on into our car. I dont remember the collision itself, but I came to minutes after. I was the first to be removed from the car, my son second. The two of us were raced to the hospital. Luckily my son only suffered from minor injuries, but several ofmy bones were fractured. I remember looking for my boyfriend and my daughter and nobody would tell me where they were. Finally, an officer came in and told me that they were killed upon impact and that is when I felt the worst pain ever. Even though I was in physical pain, the pain inside was unbearable. I did not want to believe that my baby girl was gone. I still have a hard time believing it everytime I think about her smile, her bouncy curls, and her ability to make the day better with a hug. I find that just saying her name aloud without crying is impossible. I dream about her almost eery night, that she is alive and well just to wake up with the realization that it was just a dream. She would have been six just this last week. I find myself thinking about what she would look like now, her first day at school, and how things would have turned out if that driver had not hit us.