Barbara Stroud

by Barbara
(Johannesburg, South Africa)

My darling husband Rick, of 27 years, died of a brain tumour on 8 April 2011. I cannot come right. I think of him 24/7. He was the most wonderful man and husband. I am so lucky to have had him, but my dreams have been shattered. Every day I cry to see him one more time. The decisions I have to now make on my own. The holidays we will never share again. I cannot believe I am 53 and a widow. My son Tom, of 27 and daughter Cait of 23 battle daily and its hard for me to boost them and it breaks my heart even more to know how sad they are. I love you Rick and I will love you always and never ever will I stop thinking of you.
Be happy my darling.

Comments for Barbara Stroud

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Nov 12, 2012
my husband had a brain tumor too
by: Anonymous

Hello Barbara,
My husband died of a brain tumor last Christmas Eve. He changed and went downhill so fast. I was thrust into making all the decisions overnight. He had managed all of our money and plans. He died within 4 weeks of being admitted to the hospital. Coming up on the holidays has thrown me back into the grieving process, which I wasn't expecting, but do now understand. I am so sorry for your loss. My husband was the most loving person in my life. I hope you will find some peace during this holiday season.


Nov 06, 2012
Barbara Stroud
by: Doreen U.K.

Barbara I am sorry for your loss of your husband Rick. You echo a story just like mine. Being married to the most wonderful man and now it has ended. I lost my beloved husband Steve of 44yrs. marriage 6 months ago to MESOTHELIOMA. (lung cancer caused by working with asbestos, inoperable, incurable, aggressive.) Steve suffered a slow painfull death over 3yrs.39days. It is really so hard to watch the one you love die a slow death before your eyes and you can do nothing to take their pain away. you feel so helpless.
Barbara I have 3 Adult children 43yrs.40yrs.
32yrs. they have lost a father and will grieve differently than you, myself and everyone who has lost a husband, wife, or partner. The grief is not so harsh as ours is to bear. If you are able to cry often then you are grieving well. If you can't cry then perhaps your grief is frozen and it will take you longer. I think shock sets in and we can't process our loss like we hope no matter how old we are. We are never prepared to lose our life partner. It is so hard when we do. I one day assessed my life and thought. "What would I do if all this ended and I was left on my own?" "What would I do?" "How would I go on.?" I tried to imagine what it was like. For real now. this pain of grief is like nothing I could imagine. You can't even imagine the lonliness. LONLINESS is the hardest battle we face. As widows we now have to restructure our lives. The older we are the harder it is. Usually when we are moving towards retirment we are moving towards settling down more and winding down to our old age when we take life easier and start enjoying life with the freedom we have. Sadly this is the time a man's life is cut down so abruptly throwing the family into CHAOS. I hope the days ahead will offer you the support you need from family and friends to recover to a point where you can move forward through your grief and sorrow.

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