Been apart for nearly 2 years. The pain is so bad it still feels like it happened yesterday.
(Perth, Australia )
My name is Emma and my ex fiancé, Daniel, broke up with me nearly 2 years ago. We were together for 6 years, and had a daughter at the time who was 3. After he ended it and asked us to move out I found out I was pregnant (7weeks along). I kept the baby, I honestly thought in my heart we would work things out, and I knew I couldn't kill my baby. At first he was supportive and would tell me he still loved me and he'd be there for me & the kids and that we would end up together one day but now wasn't the right time.
About a week later he turned nasty, accusing me of planning it and telling me no one would want me and I should have an abortion so he wouldn't have to deal with me any longer than he needed too.
4 weeks after our break up, he moved on. Claimed he was in love with this girl he met. He rubbed in the fact that the girl made him feel like he did when he was 13 (whatever that's meant to mean?) well that girl didn't feel the same way about him, so nothing happened...
A week later he started dating this new girl. They stayed together. 3 weeks into their relationship they both moved 3hours away. He didn't care about his unborn child and didn't want anything to do with it, and hardly ever wanted to see his daughter either.
He often said nasty things about his new girl friend, that she wasn't very pretty and over weight so he didn't need to worry about her ever cheating on him or leaving him. He also said he was going to tell her to stop seeing all her male friends otherwise he'd end it with her. And that he was just replacing me with her.
Fast forward to now, they are still together, but he emails me all day nearly everyday. He says what we had is beyond repair, but he still feels the need to MSG me.
He hardly ever sees his son, but always tells me how much he loves him and misses him. He moved back down to Perth, so he only lives 5 mins away now. But he still can't be bother seeing his son that he claims he misses so much.
I am so unbeliably heartbroken. I've been tangled into his games for the last year and a half. I'm there for him always. I reply to him even though I know I shouldn't. What is going on?? Why can't I let go of this idiot?! I'd do anything to fix what we had. I know his new gf and her friends have led him down a track of drinking & partying.
I pray for him to find his feet, but I just want the hurt too stop for me as well. I can't help but feel I'm hanging in there for a reason. That I'm not supposed to let go. But maybe I'm just delusional.
I breakdown and cry so often, I'm tired and physically weak and drained. Looking after 2 kids is hard. I get little to no sleep and when I do eventually sleep its full of nightmares of him. I just can't believe the pain is still there after this long and hasn't got any better.
Its so hard seeing someone you spent so long with, completely turn on you and treat you like you never meant anything. I can't believe it, it kills me.