BLACK CLOUD IS SUBSIDING
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by Down Under - Horse/Mikri
(Sydney - Australia )

It's been a few months now since I came across this site and typed up my thoughts under How Do You Overcome The Loss of a Parent. This site has been a god sent! I am visiting each night and reading everyone's life stories and responding to several, I feel it keeps me sane.

My father passed away 9 months ago, 2 months before my wedding. The past 8 months I went through the darkest cloud I had ever been through. I have lost family members before, young niece and grandfather, both of whom I was very close to, but nothing prepared me for the depression I went through on the loss of dad. You just think your parents will always be around forever.

Anger, sadness, blackness, numbness, worthlessness, hatred, suicidal & a feeling of nothingness was all I felt for those horrible 8 months. I was seeing a psychologist every now and then, his strategy was telling me to "relax and breath" & listen to a meditation cd. I know this helps for some, but this did not help me, it drove me insane and he just wasn't listening to me.

I decided to talk to my doctor. She said I may need drugs to assist but I would need to be willing to help myself through it. Guess what, she was right. A few days after seeing the doctor I had an angel send me a cat, out of the blue this black cat appeared and has not left my side since. They say pets are therapeutic and assist in depression, well it's true in my case! No drugs, just a lot of love and attention from a beautiful black cat called Drac has got me through it.

I am feeling much better, am actually smiling and laughing at the silly things dad use to do and the best part is that I am not fighting constantly with my new husband, it was very touch & go for a while there! I have my down days too but I know that will always be the case, I loved my dad and he will always have a part of my heart. The sweet memories will get us all through it. Thank you again to the creators of this site for helping me through the black cloud and for all you out there who feel so low and believe they will never get back up, talk to someone, get a pet, just try every avenue to get back up, you will find a way, you just need to believe in yourself and know that your loved ones are watching down on us all and that black cloud will subside for you too.
_________________________________

Dear "Down Under",

Just wanted to take a moment to thank you for your generosity to other grievers on this site. You have posted many caring and insightful comments to submissions which showed you really cared about that person. And your advice to them was thoughtful and appropriate.

I am sure your words have comforted many. Thanks for taking the time to help others.

Jennie

Comments for BLACK CLOUD IS SUBSIDING
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May 12, 2010
THANK YOU !!!! xox
by: Down Under

Thank you to all who have responded to my posting and I want you to all know that you have put a HUGE SMILE on my face this evening. No matter how many miles away or seas that divide us you have all managed to touch my heart. Thank You All !!!

May 11, 2010
My mom
by: Faith

Thank you for your kind words-it means a lot to me. I feel like no one understands how I feel and I can not just move on with my life like everyone expects me to.

May 11, 2010
For down under
by: Anonymous

How beautifully written your post is. Now I can tell you that God most likely sent that black cat to you and yes, pets are a great source of therapy. It is clear that some healing has taken place in your life. God has a way of sending the right people or in your case, a black cat.

I lost my husband in Nov and I am doing better but miss him terribly. My faith keeps me going and my 2 jobs, the hospital job and managing the complex here. I pray a lot too.

Your post has a way of comforting others and I appreciate that. Take care and feel free to say whatever is on your mind and heart. God bless you.

May 10, 2010
down under
by: Hope

Thank you for all your comments and help these past months. You not only helped yourself get through your grief you have helped me get through mine. There will always be an owchie boo boo in my heart where my husband was. But someday, like you, I hope to see the good we had that made me love him to begin with instead of painful memories that leap upon me at unexpected times. HH

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