Both dads gone in the same day

by Niki
(Texad )

1/10/13 My husband and best friend received a call around 3 pm from his mother that his step father had passes while she was at work. He was like a father to my husband and his two brothers, and also he left behind a son of his own. We rushed to my husbands youngest brothers house to be among family and start the grieving process. His step father was a juvenile diabetic and had been sick for years, but the last two days of his life were especially hard on him. He was weak and vomiting, and refused to go to the hospital. He was being taken care of by my husbands real father for the last two days as everyone else who lived in the home was working, my husbands brother, his fiancé, and his mother. A few hours before we left his brothers house and all the other family began to leave to his real father had said he was exhausted from taking care of his friend, and my husbands step father, the last two days. He had been up til 3 am the night before and wanted to take a nap, so he told me and my brother in laws wife he was "going to make a sandwhich or two, and get some rest." when my husband and I got home about 30 minutes away from his brothers house we had begun to relax and take in the days events. Around midnight we received a call that his real father had been found in bed passed away as well, that he was said to have been gone for a hour or two. Less than twelve hours apart abd in the same home my husband lost both fathers and my father in laws. I'm feeling helpless abd lost. We are to take care of arrangements of his father as his mother is taking care of his step fathers. We have little to no money and as far as we know his father had no life insurance. He was sick as well with cancer in the throat and left lung. He was his normal self all day and we have not recieved any information from the medical examiner about what caused his death yet. My husband is in a lot of distress and I dont know what to do. I wish things were not this way but in the end we will all have to find solace in the fact their souls were set free and they have each other to take a journey we all usually have to take alone
RIP to my father in laws thank you for welcoming me to your family with open hearts and arms you will both be dearly missed and never forgotten we will keep you in our hearts forever.

Comments for Both dads gone in the same day

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Jan 16, 2013
Both dads gone in the same day
by: Doreen U.K.

Niki I am sorry for the loss of both Father's and father-in-law. Life is so unpredictable. One death occurs and then we start to lose more people from our lives. WE have all this grief going on and don't get a chance to grieve each loss before we are knocked down again. Grief is a very Painful experience. It is a common feeling for everyone. We all share the same feelings of what grief feels like so it is never so personal that we can keep it to ourselves. It is in the sharing of our pain that we find healing.
If losing someone is not bad enough we are faced with the enormous cost of the funeral. How do we cope with this immense cost? Many people have to sell their homes and downsize in order to free up some money to be used for the funeral. When you have more than one death the cost can cause so much stress. Where does one find the money if you don't own a home to sell?
My husband in his young life took out a policy which covered him till he was 96. He died 8 months ago at the age of 65. 31years he had to pay up into this policy. It only covered half the cost of the funeral, but was better than nothing. Many Insurance policies have exclusion clauses so it is not easy to take out an insurance. Today we get ripped off and find we are not covered. Just like my husband he paid into a policy that did not cover him for critical illness and so he paid for 15yrs. and lost every penny (cent). I don't know why insurance companies make everything so complicated and so many people lose out. To bury my husband cost me over £10,300. and then I had to pay over £843 for the Memorial Stonework. I now have to put money away for my funeral so that my children won't have this burden. Living is expensive. Dying is also expensive. I hope you do get through this unbearable grief and cost and you find the days ahead get a little easier.

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