Brantley Eugene Toomer, Jr. July 6, 1984 - June 24, 2008

by Mom
(Tybee Island, Georgia)

My son, Brantley was 23 and I can not stop my heart from breaking. I keep taking life one day at a time and trying to accept his tragic death. Oh, how I miss you son.

Comments for Brantley Eugene Toomer, Jr. July 6, 1984 - June 24, 2008

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Jan 26, 2010
The pain of a mother
by: Pamela Teter

I have read a lot of your pain and I am so very sorry. I hope that maybe this will help my pain, knowing I am not the only one.

I lost my son March 14, 2008 and still cry every day. My brother shot my son and killed him. He was 30 years old and a good kid. My brother had been drinking a whole lot that night. My son had just got off work and went to Dads house, where my brother lives, to eat dinner. They got into a fight and it ended with my sons death.

My brother got 10 years for the death of my son. It was the worst night of my life; I will never be the same again.

I love you Ryan, Your Mom always.

Jan 06, 2010
I understand
by: Linda

My daughter and two grandsons were killed in a car accident December 17, 2006. She was 22 and was also born in 1984. My heart still breaks every day for her.

I understand and feel your pain. I cry every day and some days I cannot function. And that's ok. We all belong to a group that nobody wants to be a member of, so we have to stick together and lift each other up with prayer.

Take each day as it comes and talk about your son. It hurts, but it helps. We as grieving parents have been dealt with more pain than anyone could imagine, and yet we are still here. You are stong. Together we can grieve and help each other.

Sep 21, 2009
Tarisai Chikowore - Zimbabwe
by: Anonymous

I lost my son and four of his friends in a car accident on 8 August 2009. The pain is unbearable. Nothing seems to be making sense at all. If one has not gone through the same loss he/she will never understand the pain associated with such a loss. My handsome boy will always be loved and missed. I am taking each day as it comes.

Sep 03, 2009
Heartbroken
by: Anonymous

I recently lost my son on June 11, 2009. He was only 24 years old and my only child. Unless you have ever gone through something as tragic as this you can not even imagine the pain and how your heart aches. There is not a moment that you are awake that he is on my mind. I get agitated when people say he is in a better place. Prove it. I get agitated when they say at least he did not suffer. How do they know, they were not there with him? I do not know how to survive this broken heart. I just live each moment as it comes.

Aug 25, 2009
I feel your tragic loss
by: Toni

My prayers are with you and your family. I am still heartbroken, due to the death of my 20 yr. old son, Ben. He was hit by a car, while riding his motorcycle home from college. I live each day, minute by minute. It has been 1 yr now, since my son passed. (23 July 2008). When will the pain ever stop hurting?... I guess that is because I loved him so much!

Jun 12, 2009
I understand
by: Leslie

I am so sorry for your loss...I too lost my son March 2007 and like your son, he was born in 1984...May....part me me died when my Andrew died...I so understand...

May 21, 2009
I'm a mother that has lost 2 sons
by: Terry

I just want to say that I am so sorry for ALL of you that have lost a love one, especially a child, unless you have lost a child you cannot imagine the grief that another person goes through.

My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

Dec 08, 2008
I'm so sorry for your loss
by: Anonymous

I can only imagine the grief a mother goes through when she experiences the loss of a child. My brother died at 20 years old due to pneumonia and other complications (involving a weakened respiratory and immune system and substance abuse).

That was almost 5 years ago. I am now 23. I miss my brother terribly and feel saddened by his loss, but I also feel terribly for my parents (especially my mom). She struggled for 20 years to keep my brother safe and out of trouble. When he passed away some family members said terrible things at the funeral, insinuating that my parents paid more attention to me and that they didn't do their job well.

In reality, my parents attended to my brother a bit more because he NEEDED the help. I excelled at school and stayed out of trouble and was still given plenty of attention by my parents. My family also felt that people had "moved on" or "gotten over it" after some time, when our world still felt turned upside down and frozen in time. I guess I can't expect other people to understand. Fortunately, close friends and immediate family provided a lot of support.

My thoughts are with you and your family. I am so sorry for your loss. Brantley will always live on in your mind and in your heart.

Nov 07, 2008
I KNOW
by: GAIL

NO ONE WHO HAS NOT EXPERIENCED THE LOSS OF A CHILD CAN BEGIN TO COMPREHEND THE DEPTH OF THE AGONY, THE UNRELENTING PAIN THAT COMES IN WAVES. WE LOST OUR YOUNGEST SON ON MAY 21, 2008 IN A TRAGIC MOTORCYCLE ACCIDENT, SO I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH.

PEOPLE THINK YOU SHOULD "BE OVER IT" BY NOW, BUT YOU AREN'T, YOU CAN'T BE. THAT WOULD BE ABNORMAL! JUST KNOW THERE ARE THOSE OF US WHO DO UNDERSTAND AND MAY YOU FIND SOME COMFORT IN THAT.

Oct 30, 2008
Mother's sadness
by: brenda

Our beautiful daughter was killed also in a tragic car accident in July 2008 - she was 27 years old.

I am broken and sad. I miss her so much. My family has disappointed me with their lack of support. My husband is wonderful - our friends are great.
I guess I have much to be thankful for - I had her in my life for 27 years!

Aug 06, 2008
I know your pain
by: Anonymous

I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost my son this year. March 15 was the worst day of my life. My only son was killed at 41 years old in a tragic car accident. Only one who has lost a child could understand the depth of this pain. Yes, every day it is a battle. We must choose to live our life in such a way to honor their memory and keep that love we shared alive. But some days it is almost unbearable. The most wonderful gift God ever gave me was my beautiful Bryon. I pray for you.

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