Broken Leg//Broken Life
I posted last week about how my dear Kent suddenly died. It's been 9 months of change, compromise and just plain basic coping with my new life. The latest challenge is tonight for I had to sell the family cottage of 32 years and the deal closes tomorrow. It feels like I've sold a huge part of us. I am feeling just as terrible as during those first days when he died. During the month that Kent was in hospital before he died we had a little saying that we often shared - "I just want things to be the way they were." Not to be and he paid the ultimate price.. I am angry, hurt, lonely and just plain fed up with this living nightmare.. Tomorrow will bring a new day and, being the over-achiever I am, I will put on the happy face for the world to judge me by and get through yet another day. I have a loving family, an incredibly sweet dog and lots of friends so why can't I feel better? Time will heal all so they say. Sure hope "they" are right. Things will never be the same again and I will never be the same person I once was. May I gradually accept this new life and the new me with grace and humility. Tonight this is my prayer.