Cancer took my wife she was 34

I met my wife when i was 24 and she was 21, we never had kids but lived in a very nice home with our little dog, she picked this dog and she loved him so much i fell in love with him. We had our ups and downs but she was my best friend and lover, when i found out she had cervical cancer in Aug 2012 it just tore me apart, my whole life was consumed by this and i did everything i could to try and save her, i spend over 100,000 trying to make her life as comfortable as possible, her chemo and radiation was just brutal, i watched this very pretty lady turn into a skeleton, the last 2 months very very sad for me her abdomen and legs blaoted up the cancer had blocked her lymph nodes and she was in serious pain, i cried and cried all the time. On 4th Sep 2013 she died, part of me was ok as no more pain then the feeling of her gone came across me, its been 5 weeks and i miss her more than ever i wake up every morning thinking its all a bad dream. I love you Netima for ever see you soon darling xxx

Comments for Cancer took my wife she was 34

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Jan 22, 2014
cervical cancer
by: Anonymous

My wife died from stage4b cervical cancer too just 2 days ago, we did all we could to fight it in every way. She was 47.

Nov 13, 2013
The Lord is my Strength
by: Anonymous

My husband died of Leukemia of the blood, I just want to say it is not easy when your love one, whom you thing is going to be with you forever dies of any kind of form of cancer, but he was a legacy in his own work. My husband was a Rehab counselor for substance, and abuse, and actually his specialty was the gangs, gangsters he did 40 yrs. of this, and GOD gave him this task for 40 yrs, but did it with so much grace. It is 1 yr. 8 months ago, which he passed away to this horrible disease, and I know we never remain the same, but the only thing we can do is have hope, and keep the faith. Not easy, but we have too for our own well being. His spirit is always around me, and if it weren't for my Lulu (dog), and Blacky (cat) I really be a mess, but Lulu was also my husband' care taker in a way, she looked after him like a nurse, doctor you name it. She new he was the Alpha. I just want to say my heart goes out to all of you suffering souls, because only us, can really comprehend our pain. I still miss him, like it was yesterday. He was also a veteran of the AirForce. Love life, and saved lifes. Was a true gentlemen, humble, and always had time for everyone's pain, but his own. GOD really blessed me with my husband. On Sunday 11-17-13 would have been 14 yrs married to this wonderful soul. His always around me spiritually that is. Just know that my heart goes out to all of you, and GOD bless you all. They are now Angels who look after us.

Oct 16, 2013
by: Nick

Travis, im so sorry for your loss, its not easy, its been 6 weeks now and im still a mess with it, last night was bad I cried myself to sleep thinking of her, I miss her so much, I did manage to tell her everything before she died, everything that I wanted to I have some peace in that, some people never get that chance. But ill never be able to forget her pain, in the end it was so bad, she suffered a horrible end and I prayed for it all to come to me. I know out little dog misses her, they know, I cuddle him and tell him he will see her again, im trying to move on, I wish you all the best Travis, time is the only healer, or comforter

Oct 16, 2013
Cancer, a killer amonst us
by: Doreen UK

Travis I am sorry for your loss of your beloved wife of 19 years to cancer. This disease is such a destroyer of the body and of the family. Once one hears the word cancer they are automatically filled with fear, because there is very few people who can make it back from this killer of a disease. Some people are fortunate to have some remission from cancer but will always have to live with the fear that their cancer can return at any time. The worst cancer to diagnose is lung cancer. My husband fought this for over 3yrs. when he died 17 months ago. His cancer was caused by working with asbestos so there was no way of coming back from an inoperable, incurable, aggressive cancer. To hear this news was the worst experience of my life. I am now trying to pick up the pieces and go on. grief is long and hard to overcome. It almost feels like emotional cancer in which there is no medication for. As mothers we will always worry about "Who is going to take care of my children?" My youngest daughter is 33yrs. and I worry about who is going to care and support her when I die. I am now responsible for paying all the bills and I struggle on a pension and so this is my concern. Many people are losing their jobs and out of work means you can't pay your bills. So this is another worry for parents. But the younger the child is, it then becomes a different worry and concern for their welfare and continuing care. Hard for fathers to be the carer because a man has to go to work. My heart goes out to you. It has only been 4 months since you lost your wife. Best way forward is taking ONE DAY AT A TIME. Don't look too far forward as it just becomes a mountain of worry. Nurture yourself by caring in a deep way for your own needs and putting great care into your life to help you care for your boys. Then change your focus. Each day plan something that will bring value and meaning into your life so you get through each day. Some days you won't feel like doing anything. ON those days I did nothing. This was part of my nurturing myself. It took me 6 months to start to get my motivation back. I am recovering from grief but I still have turbulent days when memories are triggered from life and even reading other people's posts.
Just be patient with yourself and don't have high expectations of how you should be feeling. Each person's grief is different and whilst we each have our own grief journey, a lot of our pain and grief experiences are similar. You will find out your place in the world in time. It is too early to start processing the future. Remember ONE DAY AT A TIME. You will get through your grief and recover in time.

Oct 15, 2013
Cancer, a killer amongst us.
by: Travis Redmond

My story is familiar. I was 24 and Dottie was 21 when we got married. Feb of 2012 would start the horror of my life. She went into the hospital with what was thought was a DVT in the leg. A surgeon took it upon himself to remove a mass he found. She went from stage 1 to stage 4 cancer (it spread to her lungs) because of this. She fought a long hard battle but passed June 25th of 2013. The pain never seems to end. She had a tumor about the size of a nerf football in her leg and one about the size of an orange by her genitalia and so many in her lungs. I know she isn't suffering from all of the tumors anymore but her absence causes such pain. We were married for almost 19 years. She was my angel. I am left to take care of my boys. They were the only ones that she was worried about by dying. She hated to see me cry, but her babies meant everything to her. She wanted to live for them and she tried her best to live as long as she could. I wish I could have been as strong as her, I still break down and fall to pieces. I'm still trying to find my place in this world of pain. Good luck to you and may you find peace.

Oct 09, 2013
by: Anonymous

Im sorry to hear about your husband, for me watching this poor girl "My Wife" suffer like she did and just waste away was so hard for me, her condition was just horrible, I begged God to give me all her pain and suffering and you know if I could I would of took it for her. 2 weeks after her death I came down with a severe virus, I could not move my bones and muscles were in serious pain, I cried thinking of that poor wife of mine living like that for months, I had 24hours of it, I cried so hard in hospital that night not for my pain but for her suffering. She will forever be in my heart and ill never forget her. I love you forever darling xxx

Oct 09, 2013
Cancer took my wife she was 34
by: Doreen UK

I am sorry for your loss of your beloved wife to this dreadful disease of cancer.
I lost my husband of 44yrs. 17 months ago to a deadly chemical cancer ingested in his 20's. He worked with asbestos and cutting this material was deadly but not known then. The fibres lodge in the lungs and 40yrs. later gave him an incurable and inoperable terminal lung cancer. Just before retirement he died. He worked for 47yrs. for his retirement and then cut down in the prime of his life he deserved. I nursed him for 3yrs.39days seeing him go through pneumonia, blood clots, daily injections in the abdomen. Shingles in the eye. Not eating, fading away. Coped with Chemo, and Radio therapy which just bought time with no quality of life. I still cry when I recall his last day on earth and how he felt being in so much pain. A memory I can't get out of my mind. IT HURTS!!! Life is no respecter of persons.
5 Weeks is a very painful stage to be in grief. It will feel raw. You will bounce back and forth between denial (did this really happen?). Many of us feel as if we were knocked down and can't get up. When we do we feel very unwell. I took to the couch for 6 months and nurtured myself back from grief. It is so important to take time out for yourself and take special care of yourself at this time. Also what helps is TAKING ONLY ONE DAY AT A TIME. This is the best way forward I know. You will find out one day that you came through the worst experience of your life. Your wife was so young. You will one day have to go on with your life. But it will take TIME. I wish you better days ahead with good support.

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