"Daddy" Sang Bass
by Kelly M.
I lost my dad through suicide, he hung himself. I was heading out to a party, when my dad scared me, like he always did, but when I heard the sound of his voice, I knew there was something wrong. There was sadness I never heard before, so right away I asked him “What’s wrong dad, are you okay?” but he replied “Everything’s wrong”. I started to get a little worried when I heard that, then I asked him if he wanted me to stay home, but he said “No go have a good time, go have fun with your friends, have a good time” I didn’t know what to do, he told me to leave, so I did, but I pulled out my phone right when I turned my back to call my sister, to tell her to keep an eye on dad, I told her that something didn’t feel right, but she told me “ Just let him have his pitty party” So I brushed it off a little. It was 11 P.M and I was on my way to the party with my friends, that’s when I got a call from my mom to come home right then. I told my friends to turn around and I was telling them it was about my dad, but I was getting angry because I just thought he was having a depressed episode. But as soon as we got close to my house, I saw the red and blue lights and I started crying. My friend didn’t even stop the car before I jumped out and ran over to my mom screaming “ Where’s dad, where is he?” then my mom told me he killed himself, I fell to my knees screaming and crying. I wanted to run away, but I remembered I wanted to see him. I found out that my sister was the one who found him and she had to cut him down. She is a LVN, but not really working right now. She did everything she could for him, rolled him on his side to make sure his airway wasn’t being blocked, but it was too late. She crawled to her room, called 911, then called my mom. My dad was a catholic man who didn’t believe in suicide, I know this, because I’ve tried killing myself in the past, and every time I said I was going to do, he would look me in the eye and tell me “never think like that, Kelly, that is never the answer” . He hung himself in the same place I tried to hang myself, and it failed. The title is called “Daddy” Sang Bass because that was mine and his song, We were going to dance to it at my wedding, and the “ ” are around Daddy is because he put quotes around every word pretty much. He was the 9th child in a big family of 12 children, He had two daughters, one son, and one “step” son. Him and my mom where divorced for 24 years, but they still lived together. I miss and love my dad, he was a hard worker, a loving father, and a great man, even though he you get on everyone nerves a lot of the time. But that was who he was. I lost my father to suicide, if you know anyone who is suffering from depression, who seems to me withdrawn from the world in a way that’s bad, or if your suffering yourself, please don’t be afraid to ask for help, there is nothing wrong with asking for help when you feel like nothing is going your way, no matter what, everything will get better. I love you dad and it will grow everyday <3 R.I.P Ken Mack 1963-2012 age 49