by Dale Metcalfe
(Welland Ontario Canada)
My husband passed away 12 weeks ago, he died in his sleep. I cannot put into words the trauma of finding him gone. Then having to call my sons and tell them. I feel so lost and alone and empty. We were together 41 years, married 38 and he died two weeks before our anniversary. How do you remember such a happy day when he is not there and never will be again. My kids have gone on with their lives, my daughter in law tells me I am ok and will get over it, and I tell her that my life as I know it is gone and will never be again and I don't know how to deal with that. I don't know how or what to feel or think or do. I tried going away for a while and it helped while I was gone but as soon as I come home again its here, the emptiness and loneliness and memories. I just want to feel normal again but I am thinking there will never be normal again, just some type of new normal, but when?