Father's Day

Tomorrow will be the second Father's Day since my I lost my Dad. I don't remember having such strong feelings about the holiday last year, but since he died suddenly, I really think I was in shock for most of last year. But this year feels different to me. I have been so anxious this week, so angry, and always on the verge of tears. I can't even look at his pictures because I am so sensitive right now and it is so painful.

So tomorrow will come, and I will put on the brave and happy face for my children so they can celebrate their love for their Daddy, while inside my heart will be heavy with the sadness of losing mine. I miss him so much. Barb

Comments for Father's Day

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Jun 18, 2014
Father's Day
by: Doreen UK

There is no easy way to deal with the anniversaries coming up. It is almost as if we are in constant contact with some anniversary and associated memories. Not all memories will come at the same time, I have remembered some things this year, I didn't feel last year. And so it will go on in years to come. We will continue to have old and new memories. We never know which one's will appear. But we can know that we will cry and feel intense grief over some memories. I think this is God's way of Healing us. In the beginning we are numb. Rather like shock absorbers so we don't crumble and fall apart. God's way of holding us up so we feel our grief in small doses. This is what it is like for me. My father is 93yrs. and living in a care home. My concern is that I will have more anger against my youngest sister for taking total control of our father through Power of Attorney, taking his money including our inheritance, and putting him in a care home because she couldn't cope caring for him thinking he wouldn't live this long. She did all this whilst I was caring for my husband dying of cancer over 3yrs. I miss my father. Robbed of quality time with him. But also accepting his death when it comes as he will be FREE and released from the misery of infirmity that comes with old age. He doesn't have quality of life. I daresay all those memories will come back that we all go through after losing our fathers. May God comfort everyone who has lost their Fathers. Remembering that God is our heavenly father who blessed us with our earthly fathers and we can always find strength, peace, and the will to go on in life through the Power and blessing of God our Father.

Jun 16, 2014
Dear Anonymous-MI
by: Anonymous

Thank you for your kind words. I have read your posts as well, and sadly our stories are so similar, I know we share the same kind of grief. To this day, I still cannot grasp the suddenness of my father's death, and that is what I struggle with the most. I simply cannot comprehend that he could be talking and laughing one minute, and then literally collapse and die. I hope you and your family continue to heal as best as you all can, and know that you are in my thoughts. Thanks again for the kind words, this website has been such a big help. Barb

Jun 15, 2014
Past Father's Day
by: Anonymous---MI

Dear Barb, I have read your post since you have been sharing about your dear Dad who died from SCA. My dear husband died 19 months ago also from SCA and it is such a shock when our loved ones die in any manner and SCA adds such total numbness and an element of death that sears the brain with total unpreparedness. It truly leaves a huge void in our lives. I thought back on the past Father's Day celebration with my husband; our children adored their dad just as you adored yours. Those were such happy times and sweet memories but they are bittersweet to think about. I wish we could turn back the clock and have our loved ones with us again. But, we have to keep going along as life gives us no other choice. I, too am angry that we lost such a good and giving husband and dad. You have lost a dear and loving dad. I am so sorry; sorry for all of us who are grieving. I pray that you will have peace and contentment and may your broken heart be healed by our great and loving God. I pray this for myself also. It is such a cruel and bitter time we are facing. May God keep His mighty hand on our lives and His love in our hearts. My best wishes and prayers go out to you.

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