Feeling like I cannot cope with loss of my grandparents;it just doesnt seem fair :(
by Emmy
So I lost my first Grandad when I was 8 years old I lost my Nan when I was 9 years old. I lost my Grandad 2 months ago when I was 15. My first Grandad was 63 when he died from stomache cancer it had started in the liver and spread to his stomache and had beem going on for 2 years straight. My Nan died when she was 78 years old from Emphysema and had smoked heavily all her life. My Grandad died aged 86 in his sleep from aschemic heart failure He appeared to me in a dream a while ago saying he was tired out and that's what caused it(Basically due to his age) My other Nan is still alive and is 69 years old; she is pretty active and healthy etc... I am terrified of growing up and: 1. Loosing my last grandparent(I honestly feel like I will have a breakdown) 2.Loosing my parents 3. Getting older and feeling sad because that part of my life with grandparents would have gone 4.I am scared to die. I know I may sound crazy and all. But can anyone comment and tell me: 1. If they have lost their grandparent(s) 2.How they coped 3.What age they were You don't have to go into details and stuff. also my sister says that although my family feels like it is shrinking It will grow bigger because I will have nieces and nephews etc... But I don't think that can ever replace Grandparents. I feel so empty without them. R.I.P. Grandad John 1941-2004 R.I.P. Nanny Mary 1928-2006 R.I.P. Grandad Stan 1925-2011 I love you guys so so much and hopefully I will join you one day and we can spend eternity together and never have to let go of each other <3 |
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