Friday & Sundays child
by Calamity Jane
I had no idea that he was quite mentally ill with a huge host of deep Personality Disorders plus was an undiagnosed bipolar/bisexual man. But he helped me monetarily when I needed it the most, as I had to leave my state and move nearly a thousand miles away with my 7 cats. It did not help that I was a wee bit of a hoarder...my parents had died. They were hoarders, too. My son had been killed 12 years earlier and there was no way that I could let go of his ashes and things, either. I have to say that this man whom I married a year later was not the fellow I thought he was from the cards and flower deliveries, gifts, etc. He began to crumble emotionally after he moved in with me 3 years later. The 'mask" of sanity dropped away.....he became very paranoid and locked up all the computer files, etc. He began going to online porn sites & exhibiting all the signs of gripping Sex Addiction. I finally could not emotionally handle the ongoing weirdness, narcissistic fantasy/grandiosity, Gay porn, deceit & deception, secrecy, & paranoid mood swings so I told him to pack up and leave my home till he was ready to be transparent & get HELP. Well, this was a bit over 4 years ago. He has never gotten back on his bipolar meds nor continued therapy as he promised so I have slowly picked up the pieces of My Life and Moved On. However~ I still grieve for the "man I thought he was" and for the "life we might have had", though. Thank heavens it's getting less and less with time. But, I still hurt badly. Sometimes I'd like to ask his father, brother, and sister why they did not warn me that he was so mentally ill? But I think they were in denial...I sincerely hope he does not do this to a third wife someday. *Cringe* Moral of my story: "If its too good to be true, it probably is". |
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