God's testing me.

by Ron Mueller
(Allenton, WI)


I lost my wife in 1986, she was only 39 due to cancer. She was sick only 7 weeks. I was 37 and having a hard time. Three months later I started home visiting with this Priest friend of mine. We would go on my Harley and visit one day a week. I got roses to give out - what a hit that made. About one year later Father and I stopped to visit this lady. She was having trouble after a divorce, and having four children to raise alone was not easy. I reached in my saddle bag and pulled out a pink rose. She looked at me and I was blown away with how I was feeling about her. Less than a year later we were married. Twenty four years later my wife, lover, and best friend had not one, but three strokes. She was totally dependent on me. The Dr.s said, "Don't feed her. Let her die." I told them I was taking her home. And I did. What a beautiful year we had. At first she was able to sing songs with me and tell me about her dreams. Then the third stroke hit. She could not talk. She raised her right thumb up for yes, and she would wink her right eye at other times for yes. At night I changed her pad and turned her. I kissed her on both sides of her cheek and she gave a wink. I can't tell you what that meant to me. Feb. 18, 2012 she gave me a goodbye look and died. How could this happen twice in my life. I am praying God brings me home soon.

Comments for God's testing me.

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May 11, 2012
God Really is Good
by: TrishJ

Ron,
What a wonderful story. So sad but beautiful. I'm so sorry for what you have gone through.
I lost my husband almost 18 months ago and I know the feeling all to well. I'm completely unwilling to enter into another relationship at this point for fear of losing another person. It's much too soon. I just don't think I could go through it again.
My grandmother always said, "God doesn't give us more than we can handle." Where did that saying come from? I don't know that I've been handling things the last year and a half. I feel like I'm just existing. I do find joy in what remains in my life but when I'm alone I cry and long for my past life as I knew it.
You are one brave guy. I hope you find some happiness today and can eventually look back and realize how blessed you were to have had two such wonderful women in your life. One thing we can never lose is their love. That is ours to keep.
God bless you.

May 08, 2012
You Passed The Test
by: Judith in California

Dear Ron, what a beautiful picture of you two. So many ladies will read this and say what a lucky woman to have had such a loving , sweet man to care for her until her last breath. She must have known it too because you showed her what true love is until God took her home and ended her suffering. How truly blessed she was.

I too took care of my husband like that until he passed in 2010. Yes, it felt like God was testing me too. You know he's more concerned with our character than anythng esle. I know you passed that test. A lot of men don't have or show that kind of love and devotion .

I know God will be with you in your rocky road of grief. I'm sorry you have had to go down this road twice. I pray, in time, that God will bring you some one else who will love you as dearly and as richly as you deserve.

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