As I posted last month my husband of 31 years passed away on December 21, 2010. After my post, I lost my 13 year old dog who I have had since she was 7 weeks old. So I received a double blow.
In the last almost four months I have made progress by meeting my grief head on. I decided I would take on and go through this grief like I have had to do with all my life's ups and downs. It has not been easy doing this but I needed to fight as hard as I could to survive. I decided it was okay to stay in bed all day, it was okay to cry in public, it was okay not to answer the phone if I didn't feel like it, and that the only person who could help me get "well" was me. I gave myself permission (without feeling guilty) to realize that this was about me now. Because of this site, my grief counselor and reading every grief book I could get my hands on, I am starting to fight my way out of the dark, panic-filled, empty tunnel I was in. Don't get me wrong--I am very lonely and get those waves but most days I am up and moving and feeling some peace and hope.
As I am writing this, my last family member (my 11 year old dog Toby) left in my household is going through surgery. All I can do is hope for good results. Thank you all for giving me a place to write down what I need to say and being a family to me.