How can I ever forget my Dad
by Vesna J
Almost 40 days have passed since I lost my Dad...I 've been feeling sad,lost,even angry and still find it hard to cope with the fact he's left us forever..I expect he will walk in any moment and this can't be final...when he was admitted to hospital 3 weeks prior to his death I thought it would just be healing and returning home for Easter..he didn't live long enough for that..Sometimes I feel angry we even hospitalized him, thinking all that medication has done him more harm and eventually killed him..feel enormous guilt..and on the other hand have to learn to let go because it was the only right way to do..I miss you Dad,I just regret we didn't spend more quality time together and we couldn't express our feelings in a proper way..I hope you felt how much I loved you when I held your hand and brought things you loved to the hospital and fed you...I forgave you for our imperfect relationship, for the non verbalized feelings, I just need to forgive myself now for not trying harder to fight for you..
No matter what I loved you and still don't believe you're gone..
Rest in Peace..