how sad is this

I had sex for first time on my eighteenth birthday on 1 september 1970. i gave birth to my son steven on 2 october 1971. My mother opted for abortion, my father for adoption. In those days I was a huge christian and I elected to keep my child.

Once he was born my life was dedicated to this beautiful child. When he got to six I decided he needed a father and found a relationship with a man who i knew would be great father. I married in 1978 when my son was 7. After many years and several miscarriages we had 2 other children. The gap between first and second child was 14 years and between first and third was 15 years.

During the years my son knew his father from time to time. This man thought that a father had to provide money not knowing that there is so much more to being a father. During the years life went on.. Not always easy .. it does not matter how much you love someone, nor how loving a mother you are, children can still have a chip on their shoulders.

So my son made his way in the world ... he was financially successful for a while, he married a girl with 2 children and then had a beautiful son of his own. Things were great for a while. Unfortunately he fell out with his boss and then fell on hard times. His father sponsonred him in a business which was successful at first and then went belly up. My son lost his home, his cars and for a while his wife and family. I think that it was this stress that caused his cancer. At 40 years old he developed pneumonia which could not be controlled. Eventually he had a huge shadow over his heart.

Although the hospitals could not diagnose what type of cancer he had, in spite of 2 biopsies , they decided to operate. MY SON DIED ON THE OPERATING TABLE.

how said is that

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Sep 12, 2012
how sad is this
by: Doreen U.K.

I am so very sorry for your loss of your son to cancer. Who knows how your son got the Cancer? You are searching for answers which is part of your grief. I have had stress all my life and wonder how I have not ended up with a cancer or some disease as a result. Cancer is becoming the new FLU. It is like epidemic proportions now. I know stress doesn't help. I lost my husband 4 months ago to Cancer. I was his caregiver for 3yrs. 39days. Steve died of MESOTHELIOMA. This is a cancer caused by working with asbestos. It is incurable, inoperable, aggressive. Imagine getting this news. That is when our world changed forever. I just couldn't imagine losing my STeve. My HEARTBEAT. My world. My everything. The man I loved with every fibre of my soul. Life will never be the same for us again. I couldn't bear losing a child. I have 3 Adult children from 32-43yrs. This type of cancer takes 40 to 60 yrs. to develop. STeve's cancer was spot on for 40yrs. Why I ask God couldn't you make it 60yrs. to develop. STeve had retired. He wanted to enjoy his life. He didn't get the chance to. He died too soon. He didn't get the chance to enjoy the home he spent his whole life building up. This HURTS ME. I feel as if LIFE has stood still. I don't feel like moving and doing anything. I am fortunate to have the freedom to do this. Only what I want when I want. I do have a lot to sort out. But it will have to happen when I am ready. Grief hurts my body to make me feel as if I have been beaten up. I do find it hard to understand why the doctors could not diagnose your son's type of cancer. I am sorry for your loss. You say your son had a chip on his shoulder. This is understandable. But saying this it may have spurred your son on in a positive way to make a success of his life. Often the negative things that happen in our lives actually spur us on to greater success. It was not your son's fault to lose his business. This happens in life. Even some countries in our world are going Bankrupt. We are losing our Industries to the Banking Crisis. I hope you will recover in time and may you find Comfort and Peace.

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