How do you explain that you miss someone to tell you most intimate secrets to. That you miss someone to touch you to hold you. That you miss making love to that special person. How do you explain that you are so lonely. I want to find a life for me but I don't know how. I miss the love and tenderness. No one is there to give me that. No one understands the pain. No one cares-no one!

Comments for How

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Mar 23, 2011
No one can tell you how
by: Judy


All of us here care, because we have been to the same place and had the same feelings. Somehow we went along day to day and eventually things got less painful. I wish I had a magic formula for you but I don't. We each have to find our own way. Look back over the earlier postings and you'll see we all felt lonely, abandoned and ignored by the world at some point. That doesn't mean we aren't lonely now, but at some point you just start accepting that no one feels like you do or understands. And they don't because they don't have the same loss. But we do and we get it. You are among friends here who do care.


Mar 21, 2011
by: jules

I don't know how to tell anyone these things - they are the feelings I have had myself - I have written before on this site about my feelings, the loss of the intimacy, the caring, the passion that me and John shared. I still want that now after he has been gone 16 months.

You can tell us on this site when you have the need to - we do understand - we do care - and we do know how you feel.

Every day - one step, one breath
take care

Mar 21, 2011
surviving grief one second at a time...

We care, we understand and we miss the same things that you do.

You do not mention how long in grief that you are.
I take it that you are months in. Not that it is a whole lot easier at a year. It is not, just different. I have come far in 15 &1/2 months.

Not healed completely nor do I expect a miraculous recovery. There will always be hurt behind the smile. We grievers attempt this new life and try in later months to reach for some semblance of happiness. It is hard to leave grief behind it has become a way of life for so long that to me anyway that was my normal.

Time and grief carry us and some how some way and some day we will find something not exactly normal but just to be comfortable in our own skin. Accepting what is and making the best of it. I think it is the hardest yet the most courageous thing that I have ever done. I do not feel especially strong but only the strong survive. That is what we all do, eventually...
one day one step and all my best.

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