I am looking for Help.....

by Keisha
(Chicago, IL, US)

This fathers day it will make three years that my dad is gone. It is so hard and I know that I shouldn't get swallowed up in my grief but this is too hard. I am looking for help because my grief is turning me horribly mean... I mean, Horrible around the month of June. I hate this month terribly because it is a huge reminder of what I don't have anymore. I have such a huge pain in my heart that I feel as though I am having panic attacks and hyper-ventilating. I want to be able to love this month for my daughter again but I do understand that I must find some peace with his passing. He meant' the entire world to me and it hurts like hell...

He will not be around to give me away at my wedding if I ever get married.....

He did not meet my daughter.... That kills me daily

He didn't tell me that I am special

He will not be able to sing to me again!

He will be away from my for the rest of my life.

I need my dad right now terribly that it hurts so bad. I need my dad..... Father God help me....

Comments for I am looking for Help.....

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Jun 14, 2014
I am looking for Help....
by: Doreen UK

Some losses are so debilitating that many people cannot cope with their grief. You need to find good support with a good counsellor since you are having panic attacks with high anxiety. This needs to be care managed in order to understand and eliminate panic attacks. Any anniversary or special event can trigger attacks like you are having. They won't get any better without professional support. Having God in your life is good, but in reality we have to dwell on the earth and we need People in our life and also the services of skilled people to help us get through some difficult times in our lives.
I did both. I had God in my life ALL MY LIFE, but I also had an anxious life and needed professional support to help me work through my anxieties and losses. I did come through this and got my life back. You need stability in your life because you feel so lost now without your father. Memories are rushing through you and breaking you down. It is very possible to have skilled help and also develop skills to cope with and manage your life better. I DID IT. and it WORKS. To lose a Father is a very UNBEARABLE GRIEF for many people. My daughter lost her father 2yrs. ago to cancer and tomorrow being Father's day will be another reminder that He is not here in her world. This is such a CRUEL loss to you that you can have no control over. May God comfort you in your sorrow and loss of your father and give you His Peace. May God help you to access the right people to support you and help you work through your grief and unbearable pain of losing your father.

Jun 14, 2014
The Pain
by: Anonymous

I can feel your pain. I love my dad also and time will give us comfort.

Jun 13, 2014
Hope this Helps
by: Judith in California

Dear Keisha, you are at least looking to God for help..a good thing. Secondly, look for a grief counselor . If you can’t afford one then look to your local church or hospital programs for grief support groups. Then try to begin to see all the things you do have and in a different light. Do not use your loss as a means to be ugly to others. I’m sure your father would be disappointed for you to act like that. You are in control of your emotions . You say dramatic things like “it kills you daily” . Sure you are sad but it is not killing you. You say he didn’t tell you you were special but yet he sang to you and that says you’re special. He sees your daughter from heaven and smiles. He will see you walk down the isle but from heaven and he will be glad. He will always be in your heart to live forever there. So many folks never had a father to miss and love so much.
When you get lonely talk to your father in heaven just like you would if he were down here. Sometimes, Kiesha, we need a different perspective to put things in a better light.
I pray this helps an that you will find peace in knowing That you did have the love of a father and he didn’t stop loving you as he entered heaven.

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