I can't erase it
I am a 17 year old girl I lived with my mom. I took care of her most of my life because my mom was very over medicated and if i didn't watch her close enough she would fall asleep under water or on the stove. She was my momma though and I argued with her, but we had so many meaningful moments and I told her everything honestly. It was me and my boyfriends 11 month so I went to his house like usual. Mom had asked me to come home to wrap her bandages because she had burnt herself falling asleep on the stove, and I told her it was my 11th month. She understood and said I could go just to help her when I got home. I got home and went inside. I closed the door and noticed she was lying on the floor in a fetal position. I listened to her breathing I mean it was not rare for mom to fall asleep in weird places because of her medications. I couldn't hear a thing. I couldn't get a pulse on her. I called 911, and told them what had happened. They told me to turn her over and see if I could administer CPR. Her lips were blue and her airway obstructed they told me not to do CPR. The ambulance came as i sat in the corner. A police officer looked me in the face and said we are going to do everything we can, but you already know she is gone. I hated him. I still hate that officer. A volunteer fire fighter called my dad and helped me outside. My dad came and everyone of course automatically took pity on me. Oh you found her im so sorry everything. That isn't it though yes I would give everything to not have seen my mom that way but i took care of her and I couldn't. Everything next was terrible dad went against moms wishes and asked for a burial, and I had to entertain the stupid guest at the viewing. I was so mad, and I tried to not just cry all the time and they ripped off her necklace I had got her for Christmas so I took it and put it with her and told her elephants don't forget. My momma meant so much to me! I love her so much. No one can make a good potato soup like my mom. I know I have to go a day at a time, but I miss my mom. She has been gone 2 months and 17 days. My mom died of a massive heart attack and I try to walk every day in memory of her.