I Can't Let You Go

by Sandy A

I thought it was time but it just isn't so
I am not ready to let you go

I don't know how to move pass this pain
How to begin to live again

The loss of you weighs heavy in my heart
I look around and don’t know where to start

I am at a loss as to how to move on
When you my son - are forever gone

No - I am not ready to let you go
Not today, Not tomorrow - when I do not know

Comments for I Can't Let You Go

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Jul 10, 2012
The Void
by: Doreen U.K.

Susan I am so sorry for the loss of your mom and for the void this has left in your life.#
You are going through the motions of grief but having someone to share your pain and support you does help. I am sorry that you are all alone and no one is there to support you and help you through your pain. You might like to use a grief counsellor till you are in a more stable place with your grief and not just have to put up with it all alone. Perhaps there are organizations around that can direct you to go for this. I often think of those all alone with their grief and know that their grief journey will be that much harder and the pain will feel more intense.
If it would help I will give my email here in case you want to email me whenever you need to. This is the very least I can do.
doreenelkington@aol.com There are times I am on my own and have a horrible time crying and feeling very angry. It is then I am glad I didn't have to share this with my sister's. Grief is a very private thing and one doesn't always feel the need to share what is going on. I try to hide this from my daughter who lives with me. But I am sure she must know. She lost her Dad. I lost my husband 8 weeks ago and this is still raw.
I hope that you are able to find the support you need and the days ahead will be a little easier for you. Best wishes.

Jul 10, 2012
Never let GO
by: Sandy A

Thank you to all for the kind words and thoughts. Molly thank you for putting this in percpective. I dont have to let go. If i listen to my heart instead of those around me - maybe I wouldnt even have written those words. I will not ever let go - he will be in my heart always - God Bless You.

Jul 04, 2012
Letting Go
by: Anonymous

I am so sorry for your pain and loss. With the birth of each child we see a life full of joy, captured moments and pride in their accomplishments. There is no room in this picture for sorrow. Hugs, kisses, wisdom to share - we can do all those, but mortuaries and cemeteries, they are not on the list. I live near a cemetery, one we often passed by noting a grave being dug signaling that there would be mourners coming soon. That was their reality, not mine. But it came to be mine and now I don't pass by, I stop. My son is buried there. My son died by suicide. I don't want to give him up either, but I had to release him to the earth, all but his heart which I carry deep within mine.

Jul 04, 2012
I can't let you go
by: Doreen U.K.

Dear Grieving,
I am sorry for the loss of your son. Letting go is hard. It is too early for your to be thinking about this. Your grief is great. Just live one day at a time. Cry out your pain. this is the only way for healing to take place. Letting go of a loved one in death is not the priority. Getting past the pain is. Pain has to be expressed before healing can take place. You are expressing your pain. If you need to let go of your son. You will know when. So don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
I hope that you will be able to see your way through your pain and loss and you will be abel to live again with renewed Hope. You will see your son again.

Jul 04, 2012
The Void
by: Susan

My 90 year old Mom died only five days ago. She was not ill for long. She decided to stop eating and eventually died as a result. We were together in sickness and in health (talked everyday, vacationed together) and as a result I isolated myself from other relationships because I just wanted to be with her.

Now I find myself alone, grieving and not knowing how to fill my time. My Mom was the person I would call in these times.
Friends have reached out, but I feel I am going through the motions. Haven't gone back to work yet and dread the weekends, which always included my Mom.

I cry out to her in anger and pain every morning and other times during the day.

My brother deserted me in my time of need due to his inability to resolve his own anger issues with me resulting from my asking him to help with my Mom in the last year.

I know others have lost their Moms but when I look around or read these stories I realize they/you all have someone else in your lives-significant other, children, other parent/family. I am truly alone and scared.

Jul 04, 2012
never let go!
by: molly

Never let him go. Always keep him in your heart and soul.

my son too is gone and I will never let him go, my heart won't let me say goodbye.

The love we shared with our dear sons will last forever more.

The memories that we shared can never leave our minds.

who said to let him go? there is no reason why, they will never understand why we will never say goodbye.

They don't need to know why we just need to keep our love alive.

we owe them no explaination we dont have to say why. the only thing that matters is that love deep in our hearts

The love for our sons and that is why we will never let them go and never say goodbye.

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