I don't think il ever move on

by Missy

I lost my partner of 4 years almost a year ago.
We have a beautiful daughter together. And I can't help but see him shining through her.
We were going through a rough patch before he died and had taken a break weeks before tragedy hit. In this time my partner had started playing around with another woman. This itself broke my heart. We may have been on a break but we were still together. Just not officially. Within four weeks of our relationship break he was murdered at a house party.
Whilst he was with this other woman.
Being a bit short on detail as it goes to trail soon.
But 11 month later I still feel as broke as the day I was told he was murdered.
I put a brave face on but all the while I am crumbling away inside.
There are days when I feel I can't live this life anymore but then our young daughter will look at me and I know I can't leave her hear in this world alone. She needs me to be strong and guide her through her life.
I think of him and my heart could burst with the love I feel. I still get those little butterfly's when I look back. But deep pain and sorrow takes over when I relies that I will never see, feel, hear or touch him again.

I really don't think il ever move past this

Comments for I don't think il ever move on

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Sep 28, 2014
Hi Missy, I need your help!
by: Jennie

Please click on "The Grief Club" button on the left for access to the new Forum. We want to keep this great online grief resource going and need your help! Please re-post this or put a new submission there. All your friends are waiting...

Hi Pat from Green Bay, and Anonymous MI:

Could you please contact me via "Contact Us" button to the left? I need your help for the transition. Thanks so much!

Sep 15, 2014
by: Lawrence

Hi Missy,
What a terrible heartbreaking story and I don’t wonder you are in such pain and sorrow, who wouldn’t be.
You have joined a web site of similar grief stricken people who also are finding it difficult understanding why their beloved partner was taken from them.
Please read all their stories and perhaps gain some solace from them, as I did when my precious wife died, and realize you are not alone.
You are so very young to go through such a trauma, perhaps you should see a bereavement councilor, get help were ever you can but don’t face it alone, you know the saying “A TROUBLE SHARED IS A TROUBLE HALVED”.
It’s out there waiting for you, grab it with both hands.
With my deepest sympathy.

Sep 13, 2014
I don't think i'll ever move on
by: Doreen UK

Missy you are hurting right now and it is normal. You should try and see a CRUSE bereavement counsellor for support and guidance. It is not uncommon to struggle with grief and also INFIDELITY. You just don't have this death to deal with but also the circumstances around his death. Him being separated from you and not honouring or respecting your feelings and the sanctity of your relationship. He also let his daughter down by setting a wrong example. When most of us on this site lost our partners we felt the same way. Our world fell apart and we couldn't go on in life. The pain of grief was so intense we couldn't get past that pain.
But you will learn in time to go on. Why? Because you have a daughter that needs you and she will become your priority. When the healing starts you will start to feel better and be able to move forward. Keep this HOPE in your heart. WE have all been where you are and become stronger. Take one day at a time and don't look at the bigger picture. It will only drag you down. Put strategies in place for building yourself and your daughter up emotionally. Do special things for yourself and your world will begin to become brighter. This will also be a better place for your daughter to see Mum is happy. Children pick up on a parents emotions and she may become depressed making things harder for you. YOU CAN DO IT! WE did on this site. Even if many of us are still struggling. WE are still moving beyond today. ONE DAY AT A TIME. I wish you all the best in life and the support you need to get your life back on track.

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