I guess I will survive somehow..
It's days like this, when things are good, that I realize I can make it. I don't know how long this will last. They hardly last long. Then it hits me again and knocks me off of my feet into an uncontrollable world of pain and continuous crying. We've all been there, and we continue to land there when it does hit us.
This is one of the first entries I wrote where I wasn't in such a bad place or crying on my keyboard. When you do have good things, milk it for all it's worth and remember that you do have things to live for. It's most definitely easier said than done, and I know it is. But this entry is a reminder, maybe to help when I'm crying and feeling so lost, and hopefully to come as a help to someone else.
I lost my dad 10 months ago. It feels like forever, and I have to constantly remind myself that he's not here, and tell myself no matter how much I wish it to not be true, it is. I gotta live and remind myself that he didn't leave us and will always love us as he did on Earth.
I love and miss you soooo terribly much daddy. You are everything to me and mom and boo, and to my brothers and everyone else. You've touched so many lives in a positive way. And I've NEVER met anyone who had anything bad to say about you. I hope to be like you in that way and every way. You're an inspiration.
It's almost Halloween, your favorite (and our family's favorite) holiday. It's going to be so hard... You would love the costume that me and my boyfriend are making! We're going as Pyramid Head and the Nurse off of Silent Hill. I know you love that game/movie. You'd be so proud of me :) But you're not here to see it, and I really wish you were... I miss you and will always miss you.
I love you forever, I like you for always. As long as I'm living, my daddy you'll be <3