I lost my best friend
He was well the morning of 11/11/11. At 11pm that night he was taken by ambulance to the hospital and he died monday afternoon at 3:35 pm. He never woke up out of his "deep sleep". I never had a chance to say good by to him. He was and will always be my best friend. We were married for 14 1/2 years. We were together for 19 1/2 years. These were the best years of my life. His illness happened so fast. He held on for two days, He never opened his eyes. I didn't get the chance to say goodby. He was every thing to me. Half of me died with him. I'm thankful for this web site. At least I know I'm not crazy and have all the normal habits of grieving. All are dreams and plans for the near and not so near future are gone. There is no life without him. I go through the motions and try to count my blessings every day. Life has no taste, no color, no joy. I realized my marriage my friendship with Ted was the cake and every thing else was the frosting on the cake. Well the cake is gone and nothing else matters. The simple things in life that gave me pleasure are gone. Ted was my best friend, my lover, my teacher, my rock, my every thing. It's amazing how "life" goes on. It just sucks.