by karen
(westfield )

my brohter dean passed away on 4/24/2010
my mother called me that morning around 900am crying that they think dean is dead I jumped out of bed ran to my car and was on my way to my brothers house, but on the way I saw an ambulance with no lights on heading towards the hospital I knew it was my brother I followed the ambulance to the er screaming thats my brother I ran up to the ambulance when they were taking my brother out and he was unresponsive and I saw one side of his face was blue
my father was right behind me they took us to the room
to wait to see if dean was still alive, 10 minutes later they told us the worst thing that could happen to a family
my father and I went to see dean my father closed deans eyes and held him and cried I saw my brother and I was so hysterical and confused I ran out of the room I went right to his house to check on the children caroline who was 5 at the time was crying and so upset , chloe was only 3 months old and his step daughter who was 15 at the time was very distraught I did see my brother twice at the morgue I talked to him cried to him, everyone said it will get easier , my feeling is the longer you do not see your loved one you feel that they are farther and farther away I do not want that It does not get easier losing a sibling It get worse I miss him more than ever we were supposed to grow old togehter and help each other with our aging parents I am also taking care of his girls


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Mar 27, 2013
by: Doreen U.K.

Karen I am sorry for your loss of your precious brother. You have a lot of responsibility on you at the moment taking care of your brother's children. Try and get support and not handle everything on your own.
I lost my husband of 44yrs. 10 months ago and I am finding life more difficult. I don't think it is this way for everyone. Often we can get stuck in grief and can't move forward. Other times our grief is frozen and when we eventually thaw out we feel our grief as if a 10 ton lorry hit us. It can leave one very disorientated and bewildered, wondering what is happening to us. I still feel in a state of De Ja Vue at times. I always used to look forward to Easter. Clean house. Good Food Cooked, and my husband sitting at home on work break watching a good religious movie for the occasion of Easter. Now my whole world has changed. So much has happened in one year to make me wonder how my days ahead will be. This makes it worse rather than better. My father is dying slowly and so I have another loss to contend with when he passes away.
We may have to use the support of a grief counsellor if we find our grief is more than we can bear. I hope that you are able to get through your days with good support of family and friends. May God comfort you all.

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