I lost my brother to a rare and agressive unknown type of sarcoma

by Amy
(Woodstock, GA)

What started out as an emergency surgery turned into the beginning of a slow motion hell on earth for my family. My 33 year old baby brother had cancer. I thought, what?.. NO! If anyone should have cancer, it should be me! I was the partying one in the family, not him. He has a beautiful 4 year old daughter.. this can't be.
They did the cat scan, and he had s small tumor on his leg, and a spot on his ling. They didn’t know what type it was, even after the biopsy, and did NOTHING for 3 weeks. So, 3 weeks later, they remove his entire right leg (to the hip)-and the tumor was now the size of a football, but now the spot in his lungs (which we were told was no big whoop), and now spread to 1 baseball size tumor, and multiple smaller tumor. They started chemo, which started to shrink the tumor by 50% after 2 rounds, but the cancer moved to his brain. The line from his amputation was mucked up when they tried to remove it, and he then got an infection, which delayed the chemo. This all happened in late September (He was diagnosed late April), and in October, they gave him 6-8 weeks to live. I was sick to my stomach.
Through all of this, he still went through and got fitted with his prosthetic leg, and planned as if he was going to pull through this. We all had hope ‘til the very end. I was lucky I got to be with him, and help take care of him and his little girl. I tried to be strong, but sometimes when he slept, I would just cry. If he woke up, he would tell me not to cry (or ask why I was) and put his arm around me. He was so strong and brave. He died at home, on Dec 6th, and that was our first snow of the year- it was serene to me. As I watched them zip his body up, I had emotions of relief and nausea. I was glad he no longer suffered, as the tumors on his lungs were now crushing his lings and spine, so he couldn’t even lie down to sleep. He was so heavily medicated, he was confused and disoriented, and that was painful to watch my witty, smart brother get taken away by the pain. I know he is in Heaven now, fully healed and smiling, but I am pissed he is not here with me. I have just now started to go back out with friends and be able to speak about him without completely falling apart.
The last thing we did together was watch the SEC Football Championship before he went into a drug induced coma, and I am going to the SEC game tomorrow, and I will celebrate for him, as I know he would want me to be happy. Sometimes just knowing that fact gets me through the day, and I will smile up to heaven. I miss him so very much!!

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