I lost my sister, my best friend

I lost my sister 17 days ago, the pain of her loss is almost more than I can handle right now, I miss her so much, think of her constantly, I know she is in a better place but my selfishness wants her back, here with me, doing the things we did in a days time, even if it was just pick up the phone and talk about nothing, I miss her phone calls, I know when that phone rings, it is not her, my heart aches, how do I go on, and get this pain out of my heart, I love and miss you Linda.

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Nov 04, 2014
Pam and Gail
by: Gail

My sister Pamela died 09/09/2014 of cancer. I miss her so much I think I will be glad when my time comes. Both of our parents have died, my loving aunty and beautiful cousin died, my best friend and her sister died. I don't know how to be strong any more.
I have a beautiful son and husband but feel so sad. Thank you for writing because I feel so sad and lonely. I miss my big sis so much.

Oct 02, 2014
My Sister, My beloved one
by: Flexx

Just a few hours ago, we were laughing together. And the labor pains started. She was expectant and I was so happy and eager to welcome our new angel to the family. Our dreams were cut short. My sister bled all the way to the hospital. The doctors did all the best they could. I help her in my arms and her body was still warm. I though I was dreaming. How can such a beauty disappear from the face of the earth in a matter of minutes?I miss you already Dearest Sister Judith!

ed note: This blog has been transitioned to a great new Forum with private messaging. Please check it out by hitting the "The Grief Club" button on the left. You can even resubmit your post there for fresh advice. Thanks so much!

Sep 26, 2014
I miss my big sis
by: keren

I lost my older sister to cancer 29/05/14, its been hard cos she was one person I could talk too. I'm trying my best to cope but when not many people understand they don't know what to say, I put on brave face but deep down it hurts, I wish she was still here but I know no matter how much crying I do she will not come back, miss her so much, x

Sep 26, 2014
Karen Van Den Heuvel
by: Anonymous

I lost my older sister (46) 2 and a half years ago, an I still want her back, I miss her laughter, her jokes and just someone to talk to, I miss her so much, I think about her every day and it hurts all the time, how does one get over losing your "big sis", this year I will be older than my big sis, and that makes it even worse, why why why is all I can say...............I want you back Karen, so badly, please tell me you are ok, talk to me somehow ??

Aug 21, 2014
I do it for jadie
by: Scarlett

It's coming up to the two year anniversary of my sister passing away, jade. She was only 26 and very disabled she couldn't speak walk or talk all of her life but she didn't need too... I'm just having a hard time two years on it still feels like yesterday maybe that's because I was only seventeen when it happened. Sometime I just wish it was me instead I mean why her? Why a heart attack why would you take away my sister and then make me pray to you for help! I have faith I really do but why her god why didn't you take me I would do that for jade I would do anything ... The only thing I can do now is live a happy life and do it for her

Aug 06, 2014
Give me my angel back :(
by: Anonymous

Lost my best friend to lupus complications. She was like a sister to me and she died so young. My grief feels unbearable at times, I miss her with all my might.

Jul 03, 2014
by: Anonymous

It has been a little while since someone has posted on this site however, it was the first site that popped up when I googled "how to live without my sister", so I thought it could be helpful nonetheless. I am 25 and I lost my my mother at 19 and my older sister (27) exactly a year ago. She was very close to me, much like a best friend. Somehow I have managed thus far, and I look back and wonder how I even got where I am today because of how much I miss them. I have always found that working or keeping myself busy with other peoples stresses to be calming. It's odd but helping others manage their simple stresses in life has helped me manage mine. I often think about how much my mom and sister had accomplished in their lives and how much more they would have if they were still here, that alone has motivated me to keep living life fully. I somewhat believe that we (on earth) are entertainment for them(in heaven/paradise) and that we can't bore them :). I also believe that it is more unfair for my sister and mothers life to be taken from them than it is for me to have to live without them. This belief has also really helped me to keep moving. I know they want me to do great things with the time I have on earth and I wouldn't want to let them down. So dream big and never stop chasing those dreams. They are watching and they are still with us. We will all reunite one day…..and death no longer seems scary since we have family waiting, so be bold.

May 09, 2014
i lost my baby sister
by: Anonymous

I lost my younger sister(23) to a tragic accident,my life is a mess now, I cant understand why she was taken so early in life, we had so much to share, so much to talk, I miss her so much, life doesn't make any sense to me anymore, i have no one to share my thoughts, my problems, my sister was everything to me, i still have her number but i know she wont pick it up, i know i can never see her again, i feel so hollow,so heavy, I cant think straight,i cant share my grief with my parents, i have to put on a brave face for them, my friends don't have time for me, they think i am overdoing it....i don't understand, how can one overdo one's grief, how does one say,ok, you should be sad for only so long,and my husband is too busy with his work.I just want my sister back....I just want everything to be the way it was.

Apr 27, 2014
My Sister, I can't live without you!
by: Rose

Dear reader,
How can one live without a sister Florence, that made life a joy?
Who would take me on her Schwinn bike and play handball, then go to Hinches ice cream parlour for chicken salads an root beers an then hit the movies.
Who would dance all over with me pretending she was Elvis, wearing spit curls, calling them sideburns.
Taking me to Murray the K shows were we saw Stevie Wonder preforming for the first time his new song "Fingertips".
Making Christmas the mystery and rejoicing time and atmosphere to my soul.
Summers with supreme happiness!
A wise ass that was so funny and always on my side. How can I get the image of her out of my mind when I discovered her on the toilet, her head resting on the bathtub, full of blood because her operation made her intestines fall.
Calling her in the morning with no reply, then going downstairs to see this actual horror. Live without you is only pain and sorrow Flo. The only good thing about life is it will end and then I can join where you are too, my older sister who always looks out for me and clued me into everything. I love you more then life.

Jan 05, 2014
I want my sister to hold me
by: selina

Dear sherie my beautiful strong sister, I love you so much its killing me, I wake up every day feeling like iv lost something and I feel angry because I dont know what im looking for then I realise its you, I miss you so much I just want you to come back , I know your in heaven now and I think of ways I can come with you but I cant leave my babies im so sorry sher I love you so much I promise I will see you soon, all my love forever from your sister selina.xxxxxxxxxxxp.s I know you sit with me sometimes I can feel you.xxxxxx

Dec 23, 2013
My beautiful sister
by: Marie

I lost my sister to breast cancer on the 8 sept this year . It is so hard to feel like living again . It feels so cruel ,so wrong . She was only 46 and had a lot to live for . My poor elderly parents - it is so horrible for them . My children keep me going otherwise I wouldn't get out of bed somedays . I loved her so much . We were so close . She was so beautiful and so talented . Love you Caroline x x

Dec 01, 2013
I lost my sister
by: Dee

i lost my sister yesterday....ohhh i feel so much pain i dont know how to handle this is too much...how do i ease the pain

Nov 26, 2013
Lost my 34 year old sister
by: Anonymous

I miss my little sissy so much! We lost her out of nowhere to a GI bleed overnight. It has been over a year and I have no idea how to survive this!

Thank you all for talking here!

Nov 25, 2013
lost my sister
by: Anonymous

I lost my sister 5 days ago, she was not only my sister but my best friend. We spent hours talking on the phone, she kept me going with her needs every day. She was taken with cancer and in 6 weeks she was gone. I try and keep busy and feel she is in heaven now and free from suffering and I pray she is forever happy. If there is anything to make this feeling go away I would love to know, I try and remember the happy times likethe day she bought my first high heels I love her so very much.

Nov 15, 2013
lost my baby sister and bestfriend
by: Anonymous

my sister lost her life through suicide. its been 7 months till today. she was like my bestfriend; my person whom i run back home to share my stories with. the lost of her is so painful and heart-aching. everyday when my doorbell rings i hope its her. i hope that she will come back some day. i know you're in a better place now but losing you has been one of the hardest thing in my life that i will never get through. you will always be my baby sister/bestfriend/ and my person.

Oct 11, 2013
purple peace
by: gg

My sister Sarah was murdered on September 9th, 2012 by the hands of the monster she was married to. Its been over a year and the emotional rollercoaster I am on does not seem to stop. I am now raising my sisters daughter who is 10, I think without her I would not even get out of bed most days. I have depression, complicated grief, anxiety. The only worse than this is experience is Having tell my again mother than her daughter had been shot to death. and telling her adult child the same news. I am so alone without her. I have lots of other siblings but this sister is the one i am closest too. As purple is the color that represents domestic violence, and I hope my family eventually finds peace, i say to each of u who have gone thru the same thing, may you eventually find purple peace in your heart. M

Oct 06, 2013
Lost my sister, my life
by: Anonymous

My sister gave me everything. She protected me in secondary school, taught me how to learn and got me into a challenging university course.

She literally made me who I am, I would literally be nothing without her.

Since her suicide, I felt like I was never that one person she wanted to live for. I felt both anger and felt that I was smaller than I would have ever been.

She died 20 days ago yet it feels like I am learning more about her from thinking about small things.

I see all the brothers with their older sisters. I can no longer feel the need to relate to them. They have sisters, I no longer have mine. They have a guardian, I do not and I am alone in this world.

I wish I was the something my sister would live for.

Sep 07, 2013
My sister my best friend
by: Tukes

Its been just over a year now since my beautiful sister died from cancer and I am still missing her each and every day. I often think of things I need to let her know about then I realise she's dead and I can't ask her and it kills me. It's like everyone has forgot her as no one speaks of her but she is on my mind constantly. I just miss her so much I keep hoping it will get easier but every day I think of her and tears come to my eyes. I want so much for one last coffee and chat, but I know I never will and it hurts so much.death is so final there is no solution, no problem solving, it's just so final and awful. I miss you babes i always will x

Jul 18, 2013
by: Tommy

I lost my sister yesterday July 17,2013 to breast cancer. It was a little over a year after her diagnosis. She was 41. She was beautiful thoughtful brave gifted smart and raised me most of my life. She looked out for me and took care of me. The amount of grief shock anger and disbelief is beyond comprehension and reading all your stories I know you all feel the same way. It is truly not fair that any family should be torn apart because of such untimely death. Sadly everything I feel and life without her will become a cliche such as time heals all wounds and stuff like that. I know Maria taught me to be brave and love and live life. I will live for her and she will live in me. I will carry on because she would have hated to see me or anyone else in the family not live. I was blessed to have her in my life for 38 years and they will always be the best years of my life! Love and miss you Maria!!

Jul 04, 2013
I think about my siter
by: Marie Jose

Hello there,
I lost my sister , more than one year ago. What's another year? I can't tell you. She was my soulsister although we had our conflicts too, when we were inb our younger years.
It doesn't matter...Wat 's love ....etc.

May 08, 2013
Each days a struggle...
by: Tukes

I lost my sister who was my best friend and my support system 7 months ago . Every day I choke up at the memories of her dying. She died at home from cancer and in my mind I play over and over again her final moments. She was 46 and beautiful both inside and out. I spoke every day on the phone to her and moved in in the last year to help care for her daughter whilst she was so ill. I feel guilty every time I cry as her daughter has lost her mom and is being so brave about it so i feel wrong to cry so much but each night I put her daughter to bed I cry afterwards. Everyone thinks im coping so well but i have to pretend for the sake of my niece inside and when im on my own i am crushed its a struggle without her and I feel so lonely without her. I have plenty of coffee friends but no support system , my sister was my support and without her I have a big gap in my life which I can't fill. I have custody of her daughter and that is a blessing but I still miss my sister so much it overwhelms me. I can sit on a bus or be shopping at th supermarket and I just cry. I always loved her and always will she was my best friend she was my sister and I miss her.

May 07, 2013
Life is Bliss
by: Anonymous

I lost my sister a yr and half ago. I miss her alot. I cant cry in front of parents as their only hope of living is me right now. She was 17 and we lost her to cancer. I wish she was here, right next to me, wiping my tears off and help me in my life by making it better. I wished all these are just dreams. I wake up and everything's normal like how we were before. ':(

Apr 11, 2013
by: Anonymous

I just found out today that my sister, Chris 42 years old, died literally on the other side of the world. She had her demons and they may have finally caught up with her, but I remember her as that "2nd mom"/older sister that cared for me and loved me like no one else. She was one of the most amazing people I've known and her intelligence was extraordinary. It breaks my heart to know that she died the way she did, alone in a homeless shelter so far away from those that loved her and wanted her to get better. I am heart broken and have no idea how I am going to cope, but I guess I have no choice right? The worst part is that this is the second child that my amazing and beautiful mom has lost, not to mention 2 miscarriages. She is an incredibly strong and amazing woman who doesn't deserve such pain and loss. I am truly at a loss........

Apr 10, 2013
9 years
by: Anonymous

its been 8 years since i lost my big sister. We are 2 years apart and were meant to share grown up dreams together. She was only 22.
sometimes for months im okay, sometimes the pain becomes unbearable and i want to rip my heart out of my chest.... its a never ending journey.....

Mar 29, 2013
by: Sylvia

I lost my youngest sister, so very suddenly and unexpectedly, on 29th January 2013. She was 46. This has shaken the very foundation of our family. I feel such deep pain and the future looks very dark and bleak. I don't know how I will go through life without her, and if not for my own family, I would not bother with my own life. I keep wishing I could see her one more time, hear her voice, have an argument with her ... anything just to have her in front of me. I never dreamt I'd go through such pain.

I can empathise with everyone on this site. I don't have the answer about how we will continue with life. I believe this pain will last until the day I die. Oh Rosy, I miss you so terribly ...

Mar 06, 2013
The journey. Rip Ruth
by: Pauline

My sister my best friend passed away 11 day ago 2/2213
I had cared for her and stay with my sister for 74 day.while in hospitals /rehabs for treatment of liver cancer;"We were best friends. Prior to my sister's death, she was calling out for our my deceased mother I was with her when she passed. I held her in my arms and kissed her on the cheek and told her that I loved her She took two peaceful breaths and was gone. I could actually feel her soul leave her body. It was like all her pain and suffering was gone and she was was being born again - very beautiful. Then I sobbed. The best things are my memories of her life and those last days together.
I know she is in a better place but my heart is breaking i just wants her back, here with me, There are times when I fell helpless.

Feb 27, 2013
I lost my sister and best friend too
by: Julie

I lost my sister to stomach cancer 3 years ago. It's like a nightmare that I just want to wake up from. We lived together and did everything together. She was always a positive person and had the most wonderful smile. I miss our talks in her car after work and our Saturday ritual at the hairdressers and then breakfast. I miss our vacations together, but most of all her! I would have traded places with her in a second. I am grateful that I was there to comfort her during her sickness, but wish I could have done more. I love and miss you so much Beth!

Feb 05, 2013
by: Anonymous

I lost my sister almost 3 weeks ago and I'm so tired. I'm barely making it through work. Tired of faking it but I don't have a choice except to just keep going because I have a wife and kids. If it wasn't for them I would get in my car and just drive in some random direction and disappear. So many comments here I've read hit home. thanks to those that shared

Jan 13, 2013
please help me if yu can
by: Anonymous

i too lost my sister recently and me like yu she was is my best friend and i dont know how to go on with out her im losing my mind slowly every day i have good days and bad one please i need help

Jan 10, 2013
I am there with you
by: DrFehlGood

I lost my sister, who was only 30, last xmas eve. She was a diamond on Earth, and my best friend. For as much as she could piss me off, I loved that woman, and life will never be the same. Obvously I am not doing too well, if 3 weeks later I am still google searching the fact that she is gone. Some days I still send her text messages, knowing that there is noone on the other side. I still send her facebook requests for the stupid games I know she hates. I miss you Kat...I just wish there was a way you could come back to me.

Dec 16, 2012
Zoe mean's Life
by: Anonymous

I lost my sister Zoe last year a week before my birthday I am still feeling very upset and miss her very much. I do know that she is at peace, and she is looking down with a smile. It is hard at times to stop thinking about different things. they say time heals - yes,and no time go's on but they are always in your heart and mind.
R.I.P my Beautiful Sister.

Dec 02, 2012
my sister Diane
by: Susie A

I lost my younger sister to breast cancer on Dec.29,2011.She was my best friend,the keeper of all my secrets.Now with Christmas coming I feel even more grief.I still can't believe that she is not here with me anymore.My heart aches for her.I am so lonely,we spent everyday together.I hope and pray that she is happy and watching over me.I miss and love you Diane very much.Merry Christmas little sister..

Nov 01, 2012
Mariah Lloyd R.I.P.
by: Taylor Lloyd

I lost my sister a month ago.... Worst feeling ever....every body looks up the story and say the feel so horrible but they have no idea....

Nov 01, 2012
13 years lost my best freinds and sister
by: cameron

im 13 i lost my best freind we knew egother for 10 years now we separate over DCFS dont talk my sister was a stilborn now im still breaking mirrors in life and my dreams i cant take it it came to fast for me pepole make fun of her alomost killed themm help

Oct 05, 2012
my sister jodi
by: my sister jodi

I lost my sister my best friend just over a year ago in a tragic accident, my life is so sad without her , it was always me and her against the world and now its just me !!! I feel angry she isn't still here with me.always and 4ecpver she said X

Sep 03, 2012
i lost my sister
by: Anonymous

I am 35 years old and just lost my 40 year old sister on the 30th of aug 2012 . She is my only sibling and I am devastated! I can't stop crying, I feel like my life is over and I will never heal. i fell very lonely, god whr my sister i luv my sister very much miss u my loving sister

Aug 09, 2012
My sis
by: sad

I lost my sister, my best friend a couple of months back. I am so mad, she had so much to live for. In March she went to the clinic for a sinus infection, unbeknownst to her she had Lupus, 3 months of fighting for her life she left in June.

Jul 25, 2012
My lovely sister
by: kiki

I lost my sister on Tuesday, september 27th, 2011. it was a cerebral aneurysm. No one saw it coming. she was only 19years old. no day goes by that i do not think of her. A part of me is lost forever and nothing can bring it back. my heart breaks more each living moment. Help me please!

Jun 20, 2012
How do I cope?
by: Jackie

So many of your comments are my thoughts exactly. I just lost my sister 13 days ago after an illness that wasn't supposed to take her life. I know that she isn't suffering anymore but I miss her so! She was only 45 and was my strong big sister. My soul cries out for the loss of my childhood playmate, my running buddy, my best friend.

Jun 02, 2012
by: Anonymous

I lost my dearest sister on 13th of april 2012 (the worst day yet).She was just 22yrs old.I don't know when i am going to come out of this trauma.Day by day it is becoming more difficult to live on this earth without her.By her death I had realized 1 thing that there is no god anywhere.And if he is really there nobody is as cruel as him.I hate him.My sister was the best sister in the world.God had ruined my and my family's life by his cruel act.My sister was very kind and she had never harmed anybody,then why god took her life and destroyed ours.We will never be happy even if we get the precious of things in our lives and even if we become very rich.God has snatched every little happiness from us.If he has the power to give lives he should also give proper age to it.22yys is no age to take life back.I am just waiting for my death so that I can meet my angel sister.

May 23, 2012
by: India.

I lost my sister almost 30 yr back.I am still not able to come- out of the sorrow.Looking here for someone who can become my sister..All who lost their sister...may god bless her sole..VINISH.BHATIA@GMAIL.COM

Mar 08, 2012
me too
by: Lee

I am having the exact feelings. My sister and I lived together. She died March 6 after I took her to the doctor, thinking she just had the flu. I am not comitting suicide this morning because I stumbled onto this website. I think I was meant to be encouragement to you. My pain is so big, that I am still having suicidal thoughts, but I know I won't do it today. Thank you for letting me know I am not alone--even though I feel so alone in this overwhelming grief.

Dec 05, 2011
my sister was killed in a terrible accident
by: lori

I lost my sister 9 months ago in a terrible accident. I'm devastated. She was my only sibling. I am traumatized by her death. I know I need help. I'm so scared about a future without her. I can't believe she's gone. I'm 41, she was 38 and we were extremely close. How do I go on?

Nov 28, 2011
does it get easier?
by: jamie

I am 30 years old and just lost my 25 year old sister on the 9th of november2011 to a heroin overdose. She is my only sibling and I am devastated! I can't stop crying,I recently buried my bestfriend 4 years ago on the very same day and month. I feel like my life is over and I will never heal. We just had our first thanksgiving and now christmas and then her b day!

Nov 11, 2011
Me too!
by: Laura

I feel exactly the same way. My sister (and best friend) lost her battle with cancer 11 days ago. She was only 48. I should be rejoicing that she is in heaven and no longer in pain but instead I am selfishly feeling sorry for myself and wishing she was still here.

Oct 10, 2011
I lost my sister too
by: Anonymous

Hi. It took me 2 years to get through a day without crying. The grief of losing your sister is something no one understands unless they have experienced it. I get a little jealous when my friends talk about their sisters. So many times I think of something I need or want to tell my sister, and several times I've even picked up the phone to call her. Prayer was and is the only thing that has helped me, along with antidepressants. I've recently been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I don't think I will ever recover from her death...which was in 2002. I'm very sorry for your loss. There are some good books that help....The Purpose Driven Life seemed to help me, so did 90 Minutes In Heaven. There are a lot of us here for you.

Oct 09, 2011
by: Kathleen Orozco

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my sister 3 years ago and it seems like yesterday but time heals . She was very sick and is now in a better place. We had 50 years together and not a day passes where I don't remember her but without the pain but with happiness with my memories in my heart. Hang in there it does get better! I promise.

Oct 09, 2011
God Be With You
by: Susie

One day at a time honey. I lost my son in April, my daughter is so sad from his loss. Take it one day at a time. Take care of yourself, be kind to you. The pain and sorrow leave a mark on all.
Love from a Mom & Grandmother form Kansas ......

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