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I Lost My Two Sons

by Judy Taylor
(Pelion SC)

I am the mother of 2 wonderful sons, they were my life. I was a single mom, a very proud mom. On July 4th, my son Shawn, who was 28, was sitting in his truck fussing with his girl friend. I was fixing his dinner then noticed he was gone, so I fixed his plate for later.

My phone rang at 11:30pm someone said Shawn wrecked his truck 2 miles from home. I kept calling his cell, but the answer I got, they would not me go to him, he died on inpact. Then his older brother was very ill, and died on Aug,10 '07. He was sick that morning, did not get up. About 11:30am he asked for a glass of ice water. 3 hours later his friend came and found him dead. They said it was a heart attack, but in my heart I believe his heart was broken.

I want to be with them so badly. I know it's a sin to kill yourself but I am ready.

Comments for
I Lost My Two Sons

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I'm afraid that I will lose another son too
by: Kathy

I lost one of my sons at the age of 34 in a car accident. I am so afraid that his twin brother will commit suicide. I know just how he feels, because I want to die too. He is over drinking now and won't even talk about his brother unless he is drunk. He gets angry with me when I try to talk about him or when I try to ask him how he's doing. He won't see a doctor. The accident was in November of 2009 so 13 months ago. Everyone says it will get better, but I don't believe it. It seems to get worse all the time.

Why my children?
by: Anonymous

I lost my son suddenly at 43, on Feb 2, 2010. He was handsome, loving and lovable. Several years ago, I lost a daughter at 13 yrs old after a long painful illness. My two sons had each other to comfort each other and became extremely close. Now I watch my only remaining child suffer the ultimate loss. I wonder how to go on, but I will,because my son loved me with all his heart, he would never want me to give up. My only living son is very sick also. Why do some have healthy happy children and live to see us pass on, there is no true answer.

Be Strong Judy
by: Ms Horse - Australia

Judy, your heartache and pain is felt through your words. Your time has not come to leave this earth, you are here for a reason, therefore you must continue to search for it. Ending your life may bring you happiness, then again may not. We have no idea what is on the other side, good or bad.

Ending your life would only leave grief and heartache for all those around you who love you dearly. How are they supposed to go on? (Just remember the heartache you feel).

It is too early for you to think of anything but pain, but do not be afraid to let it all out, even if it is done here on this website (just like me). Cry, scream, laugh, even throw things if it helps, but just remember you must keep your sons memories alive, no one else will ever be able to do such a job as mum.

They will be looking after you Judy, you will sense them, just don't be afraid, and allow yourself to bond with them. My sincere condolences and heartfelt hugs to you.

So Sorry
by: Karen

Judy, I am so sorry for your heartbreak. I lost my husband 2 months ago, however; I cannot attempt to tell you I understand. My prayers are with you. I do understand the dark hole you are in. I fight everyday to pull out of mine, I hope you do the same. Remember this, they are looking over you daily. May God be with you.

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