I LOST MY VERY BEST FRIEND_ MY MOM
by Dawn Faihtinger
Yesterday 4/24/2013 at 11:00 am I watched my Mom take her last grueling breath. I told you Mom I would be there till the end, I just didn't realize how hard that promise would be to do. As I watched you struggle these last months trying to breath just almost killed me but God finally answered my prayers an took you into his house an I now you will be safe, peaceful an loved beyond measure. My mom was 82 yrs young an didn't look it, she use to be so vibrant, always looking for things to do, she was a great grandmother.
Its only been twenty-four hours an I feel more lost now then ever, its a realization she isn't here anymore, I cant call her an say MOM WHAT DO I DO THIS TIME? She would just laugh an LISTEN an then tell me things will be ok an they were.
My mother smoked cigarettes till she was 80 yrs old, an she never listened about quitting (I use to smoke an quit because of what I saw my mom going thru}And even when she did quit she still asked to smoke. But two yrs ago 2/28/2011 she layed them down, but the horror those cigs did was awful an watching the remnants of her life be taken so miserably was awful . I use to be a nurse an know what all happens to people so this was the worst thing I could have imagined an yet now she is gone. My heart so heavy, can't sleep, eat just cry. Two days ago she was laughing an joking an then looked ast me an said "I'm dying an it will be soon, your ok now an I can GO". IM NOT OK AN NO SHE WASNT SUPOSE TO GO, I know its the grief talking it still hurts an the memories are so vivid. She had such a hard time leaving this world. Someone dying of COPD, CHF, EMPHESEMA an many other things were awful, but now she has no more pain. I miss her so very very much an wish I could just keep holding her hand an have her tell me its OK AGAIN cause its not.