Today is 6/11/11. on 5/5/11 I lost my oldest son. He was 34. Motorcycle accident. 2:30am. No one found him until about 6am. Coroner said he dies instantly, torn aorta, Doesn't make it easier. My baby layed there all alone. I know he had been at the bar, was a big muscular guy, something made him go off the road, deer, some kind of animal he was trying to miss. Please Jimmy, let me know what it was, I know I have to go on for your dad & brother & sister but it is so hard. I miss you're big hugs & kisses & I love you mom!!! Baby it's not fair, you were so full of life & love. I will miss you until the day I am with you. But I know your Dad & brother & sister need me too. God, why us? Just not fair... Love you sweetheart, Mom.
Hey Baby, tomorrow is Thanksgiving, as you already know. Dad has to work. Going to Aunt Kim's. Will go early to help her get ready. Want you here so bad....Don't know how I'm gonna do. Hopefully I won't break down. I will try. But guess what!? Christmas is gonna be different!!! I know I won't be good then. Please sweetie, give me a sign this weekend that you are here. You know what I'm talkin' about. Your Dad too. Love you to heaven & back, forever & ever...They say crying helps you move forward,,,I hope so, cuz if that's the case, I should be better in no time. Again, I love you sooooo much!!!! Why Jimmy!!!! Why!!!
6 months by: I love you Jimmy
Hey Sweetie, it has been 6 months, feels like only yesterday. Your Dad & I cried tonight. Holidays are coming, don't know if we can do this. Was your favorite time of year. All the ornaments I have to put on the tree. Your baby ornaments.....This is going to be so hard! I am having a really hard time w/this. Dad is too. We love you sooooo much. So do your baby brother & baby sister. But you already know that. Sweetheart, I know you are in a better place but you are supposed to be here with us. That is where you belong. We miss you so much, life will never be the same for any of us. Who will be Ry's bestman when he gets married??? I know he has these thoughts all the time. Please come to him in a dream. He wants to talk to you so bad. Our family is now incomplete. My 1st born is not here for me to hug & kiss. Damn it sweetheart!!! I love you to heaven & back!!! Mum
pj by: glori
It is so hard, but we had the fallen riders memorial tell us to ride w/the wind. My son was the only one that was a motorcycle rider. My father was a motorcycle cop but he rode a 3 wheeler. told my brothers they could never have a motorcycle because he also drove ambulance a longgggg time ago. he was already gone when my son decided he wanted one. We have a 63 corvette but not a bike. Doesn't matter. Like Jimmy said, when it is my time it is my time. I told him I understand that. but not on my time. I miss him so much. He was such a lover. He would tell me how much he loved me every day. I'm sorry son, I waa supposed to die first, I loved you too much to lose you. you cried when I got u a birthday card because i am sentimental, so are you, don't tell me not to cry because i lost one of my babies. can't move on unless i cry. Love you for eternity.... mum
I love you Jimmy by: Glori
Thank you everyone for the kind comments. They say time heals. I find that hard to believe right now. Nothing will ever be the same. Holidays will be so sad. My middle son will be coming home from LA for a few weeks around 4th of July. A steak fry is being held by Jimmy's friends in his honor. I hope I can hold up thru all this. Ryan hasn't been home since the funeral. Will be so hard for him also. He lost his big brother. We are a very close family & Jimmy was so very very loved by so many. Family & many, many friends. We are now only 4, not 5. Not real happy w/God right now. My 27 yr old daughter said, "mom, I'll have a baby for you to take care of if it will help!" I did get a laugh out of that. Her & her boyfriend aren't even married yet. Told her, "thanks honey, but no baby right now, just want your brother back.." Get married first. Now I think she doesn't want to leave home & her Dad & I. Hopefully in time that will change. She needs her own life too. Thanks for listening to me ramble. Helps to have someone to talk to that won't judge me. Love Glori
One Day At A Time by: TrishJ
God bless you Glori~ My son lost his best friend Julian to a motorcycle accident (just turned 27). My daughter's best friend lost her dad 5 years ago to a motorcycle accident. They were both free spirits who loved to ride like the wind. Each time my husband left our yard on his motorcycle my heart stopped and I think I aged a few years. Just take things one day at a time. Talk to God. He listens. The hurt and pain can be overwhelming but we do manage to go on. Hugs and blessings to you. PJ
the "why" question by: Anonymous
I think all of us who have lost a child ask this same question. I'm going on 11 months now since my sweet Dimitri died of leukemia in my arms. He was barely 23 years old. He struggled for 2 years. Why? I ask that question every day. On his headstone is the quote "His was a Man's Courage". He was the bravest soul I had ever seen. Up to the end he kept telling me he would be ok. I miss his sweet silly smile and his loving embrace. Tonight I will go to my Compassionate Friends meeting and sit with other parents who understand my pain. Thank God for this organization....otherwise I think I would have died too.
why me by: brenda
why me i ask the same question everyday why,why,why,.My son was 34 and lived in naples and i was not there,what was he thinking?was he calling me,over and over i replay the same thing we still not sure what really happened,and I cant talk about it to much.The pain and going though that moment is still strong,he had just cooked supper and his wife went out and was smoking a cigarette and she come back in and he was gone.We were very close,has i set here and type the pain is to strong it make it hard to breath not knowing what when on.I am so sorry
