I miss him everyday

by Charlie
(Stoke on Trent, england)

My wonderful husband passed away on 14th August 2011. He was the person I had waited my whole life for and after only 11 months together and engaged to be married he got diagnosed with an extremely rare lymphoma. - Hepatosplenic Lymphoma. He was 28. He started chemo straight away and we planned for a bone marrow transplant after 3-4 lots of chemo.

We got married 8 weeks later and it was the happiest time of our lives!! It was lovely to see him smiling and beaming away all day. I was just so in love with him and thought we could fight anything as long as we were together.

By the end of our honeymoon he was getting weak and after just over 2 months of marriage he passed away with me and his family by his side. He was so brave right to the end and only thought how hard it would be for us. What a selfless thing, what a man!

I am thankful everyday for meeting him, and apart from the diseaase and losing him, I would not change a thing. If someone had asked me when I met him did I want to continue knowing I would lose him, I would have said yes!

I think about him everyday almost all of the time. I dream about him and spend a lot of time talking to him when I am on my own. It has been almost a year and I still expect to see him walk through the door, ring me or text me or send me a silly email.

There are some days when it is even hard to get out if bed, but he made me promise to not be sad forever. He made me promise to move on and meet new people. Whilst I cannot conceive doing that now, it is the promise I made to him that gets me through. It is still his strength that holds my own in place.

I love him and always will and cannot wait for the day to come when I will once again be with him.

Comments for I miss him everyday

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Jul 05, 2012
listen to his words
by: denise

How tragic to lose your love after such a brief time. I lost the love of my life on 17th June 2012.We had 9 and a half years together, he was 50, but died suddenly of a massive heart attack without warning a week after his birthday. The pain you feel can't be measured by the time you had together losing your future is as painful as a long shared past.
Like you my lovely Ian had often said if something happens to me live your life and meet someone else, and that gives me strength because I feel that to give up would be so absolutely not what he would want for me , and I have to live for him as well now, and make him proud that I can go on and live life as he did, loving every moment and not wasting time on worries or difficulties. You are much younger than me, so take strength from what he said and make a promise to him , like I have to Ian, that "life is for living" (that was his mantra) and I will honour our love by trying my hardest to do that. I send you my love

Jun 28, 2012
I miss him everyday
by: Doreen U.K.

Charlie I am sorry for your loss of your husband.
You were married for such a short time and your loss will be especially hard. You have a lovely positive attitude which I learn from your post you were given from your husband. Spurring you on in life and giving you directives for your life in the days ahead of his death. This does help one when they are in grief. It gives you motivation to go on for him. What a lovely legacy he left you. You will still grieve though. It is the normal part of a death which is hard. Grief does not come all at once otherwise it would kill us. We grieve in stages. Best wishes for the future and may your life be blessed with good friends and supportive family to help you through the difficult days ahead till you find your path in life and can fulfill the life you have been given to your best ability. May Peace be with you in your journey.

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