I MISS MY MOM

by Tina VanBuren
(Tampa, Florida)

THIS IS MY BEAUTIFUL MOTHER

THIS IS MY BEAUTIFUL MOTHER

On January 1st of this year we were told that my mother had stage 3 cancer. The doctor could only give us weeks to months. We begged for a month and we got 3. The last week of my mother's life was spent in a hospital. My sisters biggest fear was that my mom would pass by herself, and I agreed. We were very close to our mother. We do thank God for those three months, but it still wasn't enough. So many things left unsaid.

The last 3 days of her life she was non responsive except when the pain would become unbearable. My sister and I never left her side. Did she know we were there??? I ask myself that question every day. When she was diagnosed, I couldn't stop crying, since she passed it comes in spurts. I mean, I keep feeling that I can pick up the phone and call her still, it just don't feel real to me at all! Then there are other times where it is tooo real, and I hurt more than I've ever hurt in my life.

Sometimes I want to be left alone, and sometimes I feel so lonely. When there's a crisis, or a funny thing that my kids or grandkids have done, I really want to call, and that's when I feel loneliest. God, I just miss her so much.

It's true what they say. My kids and friends think I should just get on with my life, and I just can't, it's been less than a month for heaven's sake. They just don't get it. I don't even talk about it half the time because I don't want to depress anyone else. It seems as if I don't have another tear to shed, then something, or nothing, will happen, and I'm crying again quietly in my room.

That's what I'm going through right now. Do you think she knows we were there in the end??? I surely hope so. It would mean alot to me.

Comments for I MISS MY MOM

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Apr 20, 2014
I miss my mom terribly.
by: Anonymous

My mom just passed away April 12, 2014. She was only 43, and it wasn't expected. My family seems to be moving on, but I can't. I can't wrap my mind the fact that I will never see her again. I'm angry, and sad. I don't want to do anything, I feel like all my happiness has been taken away. I just want her back. I cry myself to sleep now.

Apr 03, 2014
recent loss
by: Anonymous

my mother just passed 6 months ago on oct.3..2013....it still feels like yesterday....i come home from work every night and cry..thats when it hits me most.....this past xmas was the hardest to get through....the upcoming holidays will be hard...i guess you just have to make it past that first year of holidays without her....my mom passed away on the same day as her sisters whom she was very close to..they died 4 yrs apart....we're still in that stage of wanting to blame someone....why didnt the doctors or hospice people tell us that the infection she got at the hospital would help kill her....this is what i live with everyday....maybe someday the pain will lessen...

Mar 29, 2014
Not Getting Easier
by: Anonymous

We just passed the 3 year anniversary of mom's passing. It hasn't gotten any easier. I find myself missing her more and more everyday. Planning my daughters wedding,wishing she could be there to celebrate the occassion but knowing there will be an empty place setting next to my dad is difficult to handle. She thought the world of her and would be so proud of her and would absolutely love that she is marrying such a wonderful young man. I pray that mom gives me the strength and courage to make it thru the day and celebrate the beautiful wedding with my daughter and future son in-law.

Mar 26, 2014
I miss my Mother so very much.
by: Anonymous

On Feb. 20th 2014............my sweet sweet Mother passed away. She was 92 years old, and one of the sweetest angels on this earth. It was sudden she was in good health except for her arthritis. She went into the ER on a Monday afternoon and left this world on Thursday afternoon. Shew was aspirating. She suffered for a few days, but the doctor suggested that we put her in comfort care. She had a living will and did not want to be kept alive by machines or anything of the sort.
I feel so empty. I miss her so very much. I called her each and every day at 4 and now I cannot. I have such a pit in my stomach. I will never be the same again. I feel her love around me all of the time, but I cannot believe that I cannot reach out and touch her or feel her softness again. She is in my heart and will remain there.
She went peacefully with my sister and I holding her hands......whispering to her that it was ok to go to the Lord..............We both sang softly to her as she went to God.....I loved her so.......

Mar 25, 2014
I miss my Mom so much
by: Anonymous

My Mom passed away Sept.13,2013 from cancer. It was quick. We didn't know tell one day she is in the hospital next day told a mass has been found 2 days later she is gone. My Mom and I had our disagreements when she was alive. But I loved her more then anything. I never wanted any harm to come her way. She worked hard her whole life. I just want to call her up and say "Mom, guess what? and then tell her what is going on in my life and what so and so did. But I can't. I did talk to her often on the phone before she got sick I carry a lot of guilt about not being there for her. I wonder if she is mad because I let her down again. I find my self definding her honor constantly.My Mom was a good woman. She lived for my sister and I. and I treated her bad so many times. It's been 6 months, and my heart seems to hurt so bad. I feel empty and just so sad. Her Dad my Grandpa had passed away 5 days before she did, She never knew he had died. I hope she understands why we didn't tell her about her Dad. I talk to her everyday. I do feel her presence around me at times but I have never really had any dreams of her or her coming in my dreams. I know one day we will see each other again.

Mar 18, 2014
RE: Sandy
by: Anonymous

You're definitely not alone Sandy.
Even several years since my mom's passing, I still on occasion dream about her giving me a big hug, almost as if she's reassuring me she's ok.
I can never recall entirely if I consciously know it's just a dream, or it's that sense of hope that she is actually back into my life.
All I can say is the dreams are always bittersweet.
You're happy to see her, but inevitably the dream always has to end.
But I am glad I do have them from time to time.
The memories and love are so strong that I'm sure it's a natural sign that part of us can truly never quite come to grips that they are gone.
I am however comforted by the fact I will see my mother again, even though it seems many lifetimes away, but as long as she's in your heart, never despair. :) Stay strong!

~Rob


Mar 18, 2014
Still hurts after all these years
by: Sandy

My mother died in March of 1987. For some reason this year I miss her so much. I would give up a limb if I could have just one more second with her. I would give anything to just hug her one more time and tell her how much I love her. I miss her more then words can say. I am older now then she was when she died. It seems so surreal. I wish I could go back in time and warn her about the cancer. I still have dreams that she is alive but then in the dreams she dies all over again. Why does this still happen? Why can't I just get past this? Some years this date comes and goes and I'm fine. Every couple of years though it feels like the first horrible year she was gone. Does anyone else go through this?

Feb 18, 2014
Life
by: Chase

You were probably the last thing your beautiful mother was thinking of. If your mom were still here, would you let her see you like this? Although your mother isn't physically with us, she is ALWAYS in your heart. And I bet she is "watching" you this very minute. Plus, you still have a great family! If you spend your time crying, you won't have much time with your family! Maybe it would help you to talk to someone ( like a therapist )or a family member! It's ok to cry, but just enjoy life and live wild:) Your mother still loves you! And if you believe, when it's your time to go, you will be with her. But guess what! She's with you right now :) Hang in their ;)

Feb 15, 2014
I miss my momma so very much
by: Anonymous

I understand. Its OK to cry you need to greiv. Its been less than a year for my momma. She was my best friend. I love her and miss her there is no words to explain. k

Jan 30, 2014
I miss you Mom...
by: Cathy

I lost my 86-year old Mom 11 days ago and I feel like I'm in a fog. I feel so disconnected from everything. Her death was peaceful (and I am so thankful) but I do feel like I didn't get to say goodbye. She was in the hospital after breaking her hip and began to go downhill. During the last 10 hours of her life, she appeared to be in a deep sleep - totally at peace. But, we didn't expect her to go so fast. .... So, goodbye Momma. You were my best friend and you've left a huge hole in my life. It was so hard to watch you the last several years as your health declined but you were always the sweetest, most lovable mother anyone could have asked for. Please know how much I love you now and forever. Please give me a sign that you're with me.... you promised me you would.

Jan 08, 2014
I miss my mom, too.
by: Anonymous

My mom passed away on May 2, 2013 after a long, 12 year battle with breast cancer. She was perfectly fine for 11 of the 12 years but the last year the cancer came back and spread everywhere and she only lived 11 months after that.

I miss her so much and I wish I could ask her a bunch of questions I have about how her childhood was, what was her favorite foods, her favorite movie, book. Have her tell me about growing up and about her first job, and her college, and everything else. I will never know most of those answers now.

It's been 7 months now and I think I feel worse than I did when Mom died. I'm bipolar and suffer from sever depression which makes it a lot worse.

I think what we all need to take away from losing our mothers is the things they taught us over the years. The things we joked about, the funny things we said, the advice we gave each other, the gossip we talked about, and so on.

I hope each and every one of you can find peace after your mom's passing. It takes time but I hope some day I will find peace in it... it's been 7 months and I'm nowhere near that point yet.

Dec 15, 2013
we all miss our mother so much
by: Anonymous

I lost my mom on 4/3/13. I like many of you fell the physical pain in my heart when I think of her, and that is every day. My mom was 76. She woke up very early in the morning and told my father she could not breath and passed away. I think she was blessed by her very quick passing, but it just left us children so lost. There is no way to put into words how much she was loved, and is missed by all of us. Everyone of us who has lost a loved one be it a mother, father, sister or brother knows this pain. When we think of this loved one we need to think how lucky they were to have known the love we had for them while here on earth with us, and that the love we had for them did not stop when they were no longer on earth with us. I cry every day with the hole I have in my heart, but I know she would not want that. I will see my mom one day, and what a reunion that will be. Our loved ones wants us to continue living our lives and will be there for all of us when we move on. We all need to grieve in our own way and there is no time line on when you should be over grieving. My prayers will be with all that have known the loss of a loved one. May our hearts hearts begin to heal with time and the wonderful memories we have of our loved ones.

Dec 10, 2013
Time heals, but never completely fills the void
by: Anonymous

So sorry for all of your losses.
I lost my dear Mother from Multiple Myeloma (cancer of the plasma cells) in Dec.13, 2008.
Since the diagnosis it was a roller coaster ride of highs, lows and false hopes for a potential "miracle remedy". Most people who have lost loved ones through severe illness unfortunately know the drill.
Mom however, put up a good battle and outlived the normal 3-year survival rate by an extra three years.
She lived her life like a saint, and it just made it that much harder to deal with the fact she had to suffer like that.
Letting go was excruciating, and I definitely found out what it's like to really mourn someone.
5 years have come and gone, but Christmas time is always the hardest, and the memories flood in like waves. But Always keep those memories, and never lose faith. Mom is home waiting. God Bless! :)


Nov 27, 2013
Hurting
by: Anonymous

I lost my mom march 12 2008. When I watched her take her last breath it felt like I was taking my last. She was my best friend. I will never feel that comfort only a mama can give you. I do think that if she saw how much this hurts me she would say please don't be upset that's not the life I want you to live and this always helps. The best way to honor and live with the good and the bad memories is to give love often and never forget she loved you .

Nov 25, 2013
i love you mother always
by: Anonymous

My mum passed away last week. She had type 1 diabetes for 59 years and she had kidney dialysis for five years. Mum was only 61, sadly i was on holiday so i never got back in time to say goodbye. Before i left mum was the same as always nothing different, unfortunately on the second day of my holiday i received a call from my dad that mum had a bad stroke, and a bleed on the brain, due to high blood pressure I tried so hard to get back, sadly i was to late. I wish that there was something that could give me even a small bit of comfort. I miss her so so much. My dad and sister were there to say goodbye. I just hope my mum realise how much i loved her.

Nov 17, 2013
I miss my mom soooo much
by: Anonymous

I too just lost my sweet mother on Oct 28 she was only 58 and passed from a massive brain hemorrhage. It's been soooo hard. For the 10 year old who commented here just take comfort I'm knowing your mom like mine are in heaven with the Angela and now you have your own special angel in heaven watching out for you. That's what I believe of my mom too. Be courageous and strong little one. (Hugs)

Nov 16, 2013
my Beautiful Mum
by: kathy

I know how you feel my Beautiful Mum went to Heaven Feb 18th 2013 and she also passed away with her 6 children with her My Heart will never mend my grief is unbearable and the pain is immeasurably God bless to all who are in Grief and sorrow xx

Nov 16, 2013
my beautiful mum
by: kath

i lost my my mum on August 6th, 2013 at 2.45pm

She lived opposite me and I cared for her for many years. She had Parkinsons disease but died from cancer. We took her out of the hospital she had been in for 5 days as there was nothing they could do. We had a chance to tell her we loved her and were with her on her journey. She died at home in her own bed surrounded by her 4 children. I was always the closest,she was my best friend and more than a mum to me, she was like a sister and a soul mate. I could tell her anything and we went everywhere together. We had such fun times together she had a brill sense of humour. We had a special relationship and my life will never be the same without her. I am sorry for everyones loss and reading your experiences makes me know that I'm not the only one feeling the loss and despair. I feel so lonely without my mum even though i have friends and family. I don't wont them I just want my mum back, nothing helps. I know this is selfish but i am just been honest. No one will ever take her place. I hope i will get to see her again. the pain is so hard deal with my heart physically hurts. She was kind and loving and understanding she was perfect in my eyes. my beautiful mum who i will miss everyday until the day I die.

Nov 10, 2013
My mother had Alzheimer's
by: Anonymous

I regret being so nasty and horrible to her at times, but the Alzheimer's was very difficult to handle (at least for me). I wish she could come back for a few minutes so that I could apologise. I wonder if she knows I am sorry...


Nov 03, 2013
MY MOM
by: Anonymous

I'm really sorry for your loss. I lost my mother a few months ago and she spent her last week in the hospital too. Except she was unconscious and had to use a machine to pump air into her because she couldn't breath. She couldn't speak, swallow or move either. It was really painful to see her there, helpless in the hospital. I often think she's still there, just lying there. I'm 10 years old.

Oct 24, 2013
sorry for your loss
by: Anonymous

I am so very sorry for your loss. I understand and agree with everything you said and feel. I lost my dear mother four months ago, she was my best friend also (my dad passed 8 years ago). I live 10 minutes from her house, where I grew up. I also have a special needs daughter who was very close to her, we cry alot and talk about her all the time. I know exactly what you mean I talked to her many times a day or went to see her. I never saw this coming one day here next day on life support, she continued to get worse and finally had to make the decision to remove life support. I truly believe they can hear us and know we were there. It is also my belief that your mom knew you were with her. My mom passed from heart failure at 76 yrs. I will think of you often. If it gets you through the day cry. I do.

Oct 23, 2013
Please read
by: Misty22

I've been a elderly carer for over ten years and seen many deaths of all kinds. I wanted to let you know that with all my years of looking after people near the end and though death in my heart I say yes she would have known you was there. I hope this helps. I have also lost my mother recent so I know how you feel. Be strong and please believe that I truly with all my heart she would know you and your sister was there. Take care and every time you get upset think of something you did or something funny she did something about her that made you smile, I find most of the time this helps me

Oct 23, 2013
Please read
by: Misty22

I've been a elderly carer for over ten years and seen many deaths of all kinds. I wanted to let you know that with all my years of looking after people near the end and though death in my heart I say yes she would have known you was there. I hope this helps. I have also lost my mother recent so I know how you feel. Be strong and please believe that I truly with all my heart she would know you and your sister was there. Take care and every time you get upset think of something you did or something funny she did something about her that made you smile, I find most of the time this helps me

Sep 01, 2013
7 months and 6 days ago..
by: Anonymous

My mom passed 7 months and 6 days ago i still miss her so much the pain in my heart is like she just passed yesterday...Sometimes i just don't know what to do with myself i have been really depressed and snapping at my husband alot...Every time i think about my mom i get a strange feeling in my stomache and ready to break down. She was doing Kidney Dialysis for about 7 years and started having headaches and her blood pressure was staying high the nurses gave her some aspirn and the dr. said it was normal...Yea right til she had a massive stroke and passed from high blood pressure...I know she loved all the nurses who took care of her and so did i..I was angry for along time with them and the doctor but i'm trying to tell myself God was ready for her to go home:-(

Sep 01, 2013
I miss her so much....
by: Anonymous

I miss my mother so much. I lost her when I was 25 and I'm now turning 40. She missed so much of my life. It was a sunday when I stopped at my parents house for dinner. My dad wasn't feeling well so my mom and I ate alone. After we talked, then she walked me to may car and we hugged goodbye, she kissed my cheek. That night a heart attack took her in her sleep. I was never the same again. I was crushed. She never suffered but the shock of her leaving will never leave. I feel so sad sometimes. We were really close.

Sep 01, 2013
almost a year ago i lost my guardian angel
by: Anonymous

my mom passed away on Sept25,2012, a year earlier she was diagnosed with late stage 4 colon cancer.
she spent years complaining from her stomach and colon but the dr insisted that nth was wrong with her (ofcourse he didn't know she has cancer coz he didn't bother to run a colonoscopy for her), which adds on to the pain I have deep inside

she on Sept 2011 she underwent a major surgery in which they found out about cancer, she never recovered that surgery and we were told that she only has few weeks to live, luckily for us she survived a year, but i'm not sure if she herself felt lucky, as she had to go through a tremendous pain and struggle every single day.

I loved her so much, and I know that she loved me as much, she was my soul mate, my friend and as I always told her she was my life
as days goes by I cry less over her death but pain is still the same, I still can't celebrate anything, as I miss her terribly and end up crying and wishing if she was there with us to celebrate

she was a very wise loving person, and the fact that throughout that terrible year she never moaned or complained is making it even harder on me, how much pain she had to undertake silently so as not to see sorrow on our faces :(

I still feel the deep pain, it's like a deep wound that never heals and I just wish if I can just burry my face on her lap and cry out all that pain.

I really miss her, I keep seeing the last few minutes of her life, how she took her last breath and how it all stopped, how she looked so weak and tired, I just wish if what I kept telling her was right. Every time I felt like she's about to give up i'd tell her mom everything is gonna be ok, tomorrow you'll feel better and before you know you will be completely cured, unfortunately that was a big lie :'(

to tell you the truth i'm feel like I have 2 things to overcome and don't know which one is worst
cancer or death
both experiences were terrible and extremely painful, on one hand I miss her a lot but on the other I just can't image how hard the experience was for her, how much pain she endured and how much love she had for us.

I hope that I will meet her again in heaven, this hope is what is keeping me going

Jul 20, 2013
I miss my mom so much
by: Anonymous

My mom died on May 28th, 2013. She died from stage 4 lung cancer. We thought she had more time and was in the process of getting treatment, but her body was too weak and tired and just shut down. She spent 3 weeks in the hospital and then one week in Hospice Care. She was my very best friend. I was there holding her and telling her everything I could to let her know how much she was loved. I was there when she took her last breath, along with my brother. It is the most painful thing I have ever experienced. I miss her so much sometimes I think I cannot stand it. And then life gets busy again and I take care of my family, but in the quiet moments I cry. She was the person I turned to for comfort, laughs, wisdom, any situation in my life, my mom was there for me. I miss you so much mom. I hope you know how much I love you.

Jul 16, 2013
Lost my mom
by: Alyson

My story is different because I fought with my mom a lot about her smoking with oxygen. I was so scared she was going to blow herself up. i was convinced that if she quit smoking she would live. so i fought with her and she fought with me. and now she's dead and im so sad and guilty and mournful i cant stand it. i was always there for her and called her at least three times a day, but i wasnt her favorite child and we argued a lot. i hope my mom understands i just argued with her cause i loved her so much. i will love her forever and a day

Jul 02, 2013
Miss My Mom So Much - Born 4th of July
by: Anonymous

My mom was born on 4th of July and died on Christmas 2012. She had stage IV liver and lung cancer. I am so tired of people telling me to get past it and move on. But I miss my mom everyday. When she couldnt take care of herself anymore, we moved in and took good care of her. We have always celebrated her birthday. This will be a different 4th of July. How do you get past the hurt and pain of lossing someone that you love so much. My mom has 7 children, in which 5 are girls. We were all very close to her. Holidays were always important in our family. Mama, happy 77th birthday! You are missed and loved so very much. Love you, C

Jun 30, 2013
I'm grieving for my mum
by: kath

My mum passed away on the 18th of feb 2013 and the pain I have is nothing I have experienced in my Life its gut wrenching, I was with her when she passed away I also never left her side I did all I could for her, I go to church to light candles and pray for her I go to her grave constantly my pain will never cease, I have 3 daughters and 7 grandchildren and I Love them with all my heart but my grief overcomes being any of the above, I am not on any medication as I've been down that road before and it took years to come off I will never ever get over my mums passing I Loved her all my life and will till my days on this earth are over and I am with her again x

Jun 29, 2013
I too miss my mom
by: Olga

I too recently lost my mom 2 weeks ago today, on 6/15/2013, I cared for my mom for the past 3 years before she passed away, and I miss her tremendously for now I am trying to care for my pop and deaf-mute sister with my daughters help she goes and spend the night with my pop since the viewing of my mom. But I feel so empty not wanting to do anything but clinging to my bed. I don't know if this is normal my doctor said I should be doing better within 3 weeks but instead of feeling better I feel worse. Is this normal what I am feeling will I be feeling less grief as time goes by. I am grateful that God took my mom home she was suffering and I hated to her as she was, but the feeling of not seeing my beautiful mom,not hearing her voice and not holding her tears me up through the inside.

Jun 15, 2013
In the arms of an angel
by: Anonymous

The saying goes time is a healer and that's
Correct...it's been just over 3 years for me
And I still get very upset now..I don't think
It's something that any1 will ever get over
Losing that very special person but u do
Learn to deal with it that little bit more
Whever it was sudden or expected it is
Something that all ways stays with u..
Remember the good times u shared and
Try to forget the bad no matter what u
Couldn't have stopped what was going to
Happen.. What if?? Why me?? Just be
Thankful that she was your mum and part
Of u that will live on forever. Chin up peaps
She will always be with u x

May 14, 2013
My darling mother
by: Isabella NJ

I lost my Dear, sweet, beautiful, innocent mother 1/22/12 and I still don't believe it. The book, On Grief was a good resource for anyone interested. I felt like the book was talking directly to me. I tell people this is not something you get over, you just learn how to, unfortunately, live differently. If I want to talk about my mom and what happened, then that means I need to talk about it so I've asked all my friends to let me do just that and they have been great.
My dear mother was the kindest, most gentle person in the world who has never said a bad word about anyone. A true lady to the strongest degree with such class and grace. No one could ever be mama. I stayed with her day and night in the hospital and then the hospice and held her hand that day. I Thank God that I left corporate America 10 years ago to pursue an education in massage therapy. I massaged my mom at least once a week and her hands/ legs almost daily. When she would look at me with her gorgeous green eyes and say thank you so much for helping me, I said mom that's love and you never need to thank me for love I will always love you and I will always take care of you. I massaged her daily in the hospice and I know that was beneficial for her. I would've done anything to save her.
Sometimes the pain is so deep that I pray I sleep forever and never wake up so I can be with her but I know we will be together again someday. Together forever angel momma. Together forever. Love you for all if time. Just forever.

May 11, 2013
Yes I believe she knew you were there.
by: Anonymous

Yes I believe she knew you were there. I lost my Mom 3 years ago and like you I want so much to call her but I can't but I know she visits me. I asked her before she was no longer able to communicate if she could would she please come back and let me know she is ok and she has visited me 5 times. In the beginning it was more frequent but it has been awhile now. I still talk to her and tell her I love her even though I can't hear her voice or touch her I know she is watching over me. I know how you feel hearing people say you need to move on. I heard that so many times and it makes me very angry because everyone has their own time frame of grieving and I don't think you ever really get over losing your Mom you just learn to live with it. But I truly believe they are watching over us. God Bless!

May 09, 2013
I Love my Mom Etta Hatcher
by: Evelyn Hatcher

As we approach this 2013 Mothers Day week-end;I love and miss my Mom even more now than ever before; my mom died 2004 and I have learned to live with it; I love and miss her the same as if it happened yesterday. We all have to travel the road-less traveled; it doesn't make it easier but it does make you stronger and more deliberate about the life that you live and the legacy that you leave behind.

This 2013 Mothers day weekend my Mom deserves to be remembered as one of the strongest persons that I have ever had the opportunity to meet and just to know that she loved me unconditionally is a honor and a privileged!!!

Thank you mom.

Evelyn Hatcher

May 07, 2013
Mama Kate
by: Marion

Mama left us on January 16th of this year. It's those moments when I used to touch base with her... a question about the garden, sharing something cute my daughter said, sharing with her how much I miss my husband when he works out of town... it's those moments when reaching out to Mom is instinctual, against those moments I have no defense. I feel her with me when I garden... she always loved gardening. I feel her with me, and my grandfather, her father, who taught her gardening.

The tears are always there just beneath the surface, beneath a thin veneer of normality that breaks down with just a thought, a smell, a song. Miss her so much.

May 06, 2013
14 years and its still hard
by: Lauren 22 uk

I lost my mum 15th April 1999 I was 8 years old at the time mum was diagnosed with cancer just 8 months before and sadly treatment didn't work. However I was the child from hell all I ever remember is being told off and saying horrible things!! :( I wonder if she ever loved me even though I was a horrible child!! It's been 14years but I miss my mum more every day! I'm 23 this year and I couldn't need her anymore my family is very distant and my dad hasn't had anything to do with me for years!! I feel so lonely without her in my flat on my own. I have worked full time since I left school I just hope she is proud of me!!! There is so many things I would say to the most important person in my life if she was here now!!! The first thing would be I'm sorry I was such a naughty child and wish I told you every day how much I really love you!! Now I have to stand by your grave and say I love you and wonder if u can hear me :( .... It never gets easier but you do learn how to deal with it .... I love you mum forever!!!!!

May 05, 2013
It does not get easier for me:-(
by: Barb

IMarty..I lost my mom on Jan 26 of this year and I have a lot of trouble dealing with it..People tell me it gets easier as time goes on but I find it getting harder for me..It was an unexpected death so it was an shock...She was my everything my best friend I ....I think god thought he needed her more than I did...I don't understand why he took her from me...I'm truley sorry you lost your mom I know how much it hurts and I will not say it gets easier as time goes by cause it don't for me:-(G

May 04, 2013
I miss you so much mom
by: Marty

On 01/23/2013 my mom died of stage 4 stomach cancer that spread to her lungs and of pneumonia. I am so heart broken. I cry everyday for my mom. I felt so much pain. My mother was my only family I had. Now that she is gone I feel so alone. I use to be very religious and now I feel like I have walked away from God. I prayed so hard that he would save her life and he did not come through. Everyday I wake up missing my mom. The other night I had a dream about my mom and I woke up crying like a child and yelling out her name like I use to when I was a child needing her comfort. They say that you get use to it but how can you when the only person that ever loved you in this world is now gone.

Apr 22, 2013
I miss you mum
by: julieAnonymous

My darling mum died five weeks ago,im heart broken,i loved her so much,she died on her eighty eighth birthday,a good age i know,but i wanted her to live forever,she seemed so well,then suddenly took ill and died two days later.she was everything to me,my best friend ,my mum,we were very close,she used to tell me how much she loved me,i cannot believe i shall never see her again,never hear her voice,she had a great sense of humour,and i cant believe i shall never hear her wonderful laugh again,what is their left for me now,my dog i adore,my partner,if it wasnt for them,i wouldnt want to carry on without my mum,i knew because of her age she wouldnt have a lot of time left,but it was all so sudden,nothing the doctors could do,i held her as she died,it was an awful sight to see ,my precious and so much loved mum taking her final breaths,i shall never be the same again,i just want to say mum,you have broken my heart by leaving,i know you would have loved to have stayed longer,but it wasnt meant to be,rest in eternal piece .i love you so much,and always will,from your heart broken daughter Juliexx

Apr 06, 2013
I Also Miss My Mom
by: Diane

My mom passed away on 12/28/12 and I miss her more than ever. It doesn't get any easier; you just have to live with it. People I know say you have to be strong and get over it and get on with your life. However, it all depends on the relationship you had with your mom. If you were close, it takes more than a few months or years. I was with her when she died and I thank God for that but it doesn't make it any easier. She appeared to me after she died and it was comforting at the time, but every day I wake up wishing she were still alive and well.

Apr 01, 2013
miss my mom so much
by: Tina

I lost my mom June 4 2012,to breast cancer. Its still so hard to believe.there's so many times I want to tell her things and when things go wrong it seems like its harder to deal with she was always there for me to talk to.My dad met a woman at church and is getting remarried he misses my mom so much but im happy he can move on but for me its just hard to accept his new marriage because then I have to accept that my mom is gone and its still hard to do.sometimes its so hard to keep going on without her.i have 5 children that i need to be strong for even when im weak.i just hope it gets better with time because the pain is so hard to overcome.

Mar 23, 2013
my precious mom i miss you so very much
by: tracey

I lost my mom on december 31, 2012. She was a Christian so i know she is in heaven but the tears just overwhelm me at times when im alone. Dad and mom were married 43 years. They knew each other as children. My poor dad cant let go of their apartment i asked him to move in with my 18 year old son and i, but he always has excuses. My dads grief is immense he goes home every day cause he eats and sleeps at my place. I talk to him im a believer in God but i think im going to lose him soon. They were soul mates so i cant imagine how it feels but it really hurts him i feel it and see it in him. He tells me he goes there and talks to her and wishes she will show herself and talk to him. We went through a rough time mom was sick and hwr body was wearing out from diabetes especially her last 5 years of her life. She didnt care about her hygiene put on her make up nor change her clothes. Depressed yes and she told us and her doctors. She started drinking beer 6am alone the last 5 years. She was a diabetic 36 years she couldnt control her bowels dizzy spells weakness pain and swelling feet and legs. The last 6 months she fell on the street and broke her hip. She had hip surgery then got a series of health infection. She couldnt respond the last 4 months in the hospital. She was hospitalized 6 months in total. Dad was there every dad talking to her and tellimg her not to leave him. He said what am i going to do wothout you we were suppose to grow old together i was suppose to die before you he told her. I was there 5 days a week i was arill working i was awake at work but not there. I washed her hair put on lotion on her touched her kissed her and brushed her hair which she liked so much. I talked to her everyday and cried. I told her she was a good mother good wife and a good grandmother. I told her i cant lose her i told her to hang in there that dad and i would take care of her no matter what we needed her and wanted her with us. The doctors had meetings with us telling us shesuffered strokes or seizure het brain shrunk
due to all her pain. Mom never cried once.
She babysat my son so i could finish 3 university degree and take well paying jobs.
She blue coded 3 times in ICU. She had spirits of family come bring her comfort the last time i felt them there too. She smiled she said it was like a family reunion. She recited the bible scripture while awake. Never did she complain. She endured the pain rather than worry us. I cant wait till im woth my mom in heaven when im old. She still lookas after me in spirit though and i talk to her in my dreams. I would say isnt beautiful God is all around us dont be afraid mom you did above and beyond in your earthy life. I love you forever ill never forget how to be good to others and to be just like you. Tracey King

Mar 17, 2013
i feel your pain..
by: debe campbell

There are no words to say..losing your Mama is the saddest grief I have EVER felt!!...she took her last breath on December 8th @ 9:20 am..I was by her side..

Mar 17, 2013
Time Passes But My Love for My Mother Never Passes
by: DJ from Central Oregon

I am reading all the posts and I am also just one of you missing her mother. My mother passed on June 26, 1986. It has been over 20 plus years, since she went to meet her Heavenly Father. Like most of you who know we will meet our mothers in Heaven, we will see them again! I am listing to a song called "You’re Not Alone" by Meredith Andrews as I am writing this, and strange as it might sound I feel her presence with this song playing. I placed Pandora on, could not sleep a little hormonal at the age of 51, and this song played just as I am sharing about her.
My mother and I were best friends, and she died from a heart attack. She had Rheumatic Fever as a child she developed Rheumatic heart disease. I was 26 years old at the time with 4 children. Now I am a grandmother of 8 and all my 5 daughters are close to me. I know they will feel this sadness when I go to my Lord, as I am feeling her loss.
Even though we miss them sooo much and share our ongoing grief we can rest in God's Love and lean on Him for strength. Thanks to all you who shared your heart in this posting. God Bless all of you daughters,…..and for all the daughter and sons who will experience a parent loss.
Love from Oregon

Mar 16, 2013
My wonderful mom
by: Robin coles

my mom died 12/12 2012, she was in hopsice at home, she went into crisis on tues and died with us there on wed at 8:10. We're were there when she took her last breath, I cant close my eyes without seeing her frozen death face, she was my best friend and I miss her so much,it is only been three months, but everyone thinks we should be alright with it now, some days,im ok, and other days I cant stop thinking about her, I just hope she is with her family whom have also died very recently, I just want her to be at peace and be in a body that she is happy in, her body failed her at the end and it was horrible for us, her girls and her granddaughter, and her new great grandson. We all miss her terrible and love her, and I know that she is with god and her family who have passed,mom I love you and miss you everyday, and will be with you again, just please watch out over samantha and baby jistin, love you and miss you more than I could ever imagine, you made my life bearable, I love,you till the end of time

Mar 12, 2013
why you left me mom?
by: sonam sherpa

My mom died on2013/3/11 . After this situation I have not been able to control myself. I am thinking my life is nothing without her. I am not able to control my heart , I feel it heavy. tears even cannot make my mother come back. The only thing I can do is fulfill the things that she had desired and wished for us. How painful it was when I saw her being burnt in front of me. How painful it was for her at that condition. Although I cant do anything , but I shall make her happy eternally being myself happy ...


Mar 11, 2013
My mother passed 11/2/12
by: Anonymous

She was diagnosed with Lymphoma in April.I did'nt expect she'd be gone 8 mos later.She took a trip to see her sick brother brother four weeks before she passed.At our home she accidently overdosed on her muscle relaxers.(unlike her)She survived but starting having seziures.The doctors found 7 new Lyphoma tumors in her brain.She was took weak for treatment. She ended up in ICU due to low bp.(Monday)Tuesday night my kids & I got to tell her we loved her for the last time.She also told us.By 9PM she was on an apnea machine & no longer responding Then her organs started failing & Wednesday a.m. when I arrived she was life support.I was upset & didn't receive a call from the hospital.I talked to her & told her again I loved her & apologized for anything I ever did to ever make her worry or be upset. She had tears in her eyes when we or my aunt would talk to her. I knew also she was in pain & never wanted life support.So,I had life support removed.It was the hardest thing I've ever done.I put her in Gods hands completely & he took her home.My mother lived with me & I took care of her for almost 9 years.She adopted me & I loved her more than anything.She was a great woman & mom.I miss her so much.I haven't dreamed of her once since her passing.I don't know if that is good or bad.I have reminders all over my house of her.Things she made for us over the years & things she couldn't finish.If I would've told her 100 times a day I loved her it still never would've been enough.In the end when she passed all I could think of is I was so thankful she is no longer in pain.How I wish I could hug or talk to her again.I still talk to her. Death for me & my mom is bittersweet.She is finally at peace & has no pain.While I sit & miss her..long for her conversations & words of wisdom.Yet, thank God for those conversations with my aunt to have those brief moments of forgetting mom is gone until the end of the call.Hold on to your loved ones & love them.Tell them you love them,hug them,support & be there for them.One day you might not get the chance to tell them.I got the chance to. Yet,I still sit here four months later,longing to be able to have one more hug,i love you,or conversation.I said what I wanted to say to my mom & yet there is still so much I wish I did say.God bless everyone who has lost a loved one.4 months passed, it's slightly easier until I notice reminders of her.She is gone & I'll see her again one day in Heaven.Until then my heart is broken & I am feeling sorry for my loss.But I'm also moving forward as she would want me to & I know that she is with me always in my heart.Her brother passed 10 days after her.Thanking God they got to see eachother one last time.

Feb 23, 2013
Where Is My Mom?
by: Diane

My mother died November 15, 2009. The day before
she had a stroke and a heart attack in her sleep--my father called me to come as he could not wake her in the morning, They had been married 6 months short of 60 years. My mother was born with a malformed heart valve that bothered her all her life. At the end of her life she couldn't walk and fell down often. After her death my Dad said she told him she wanted to die. Mom was 84 years young. I knew she would die at that age--we are white witches for almost 4 generations. My Mom wanted to keep me away from that fact but my first experience happened at mass when I was 12 years old. My Mom was apalled.
That wierdness connected me and my Mom and now there's nothing there and I am so alone. I was never worried about her death because I was SURE I would see and hear from her after she passed--but nothing. I had to place my Mom in a hospital
where she died alone. I never wanted that. The hospital called and said my Mom had started to die
and get there in a hurry. My Dad is an early freak and I am always late. I was at my Dad's house in 5 minutes flat--he was not ready for almost 20 minutes and in those 20 minutes Mom died. I have a brother that didn't even want to come to the hospital. I feel so bad she died alone and I couldn't at least see her off. When
I die I hope I'll see her again.

Feb 20, 2013
I love you, mom.
by: Anonymous

Today is four weeks since my mom died (January 22, 2013). I miss her so much. I am crying as I type this. The first couple of weeks were just crazy busy, closing out her apartment and sorting through things. Now I am finding myself with more time to think and remember, and all I do is cry. She died of renal failure. She did not want dialysis or to be kept alive by any heroic means. She was 87 years old. She was not alone when she died; I was there in the ER, along with my sister, my husband, her husband, and a niece. She knew we were there because she told us to go home as if we were there for a visit, but I do not know if she actually knew she was dying. I close my eyes and I still see the moment of her death, and I do not have anyone who understands how much I loved her and miss her. Just one more day, one more hour, to tell her...

Feb 18, 2013
Missing you Mom
by: Rhonda

My mother passed 02/07/13- my birthday 38th is 02/17, it has been 11 days and one birthday with out my mother, I do not think I will ever look at my birthday the same, I miss my mother so much, I try to be strong for my kids and husband ,but I am hurting inside so much, I try to still call her as this I did daily , and I reach for phone , but then it hits me she is no longer here. I know she was ready to go she suffered so much in this life, we talked about death and we was able to say all we needed to...so I thought, I have no regrets, just pain and sadness. She was my best friend my only true friend. I was lucky to spend that sat before she died with her, and able to speak on the phone with her day before she passed, I know some do not get that. I know that she is happier and out of pain and she has two legs(she had cancer when I was 6 and lost her leg.) She can dance, see her son who has passed,also her own mother and father...But I am selfish and wished I did not have to share her , as I miss her so much and really want her back.

Feb 16, 2013
Miss my mom
by: Barb.

I lost my mom January 26 she was doing kidney dialysis for 7 years...The doctors kept telling her to get a transplant she was in great health for one...My mom was 73 she said no she felt that the healing process would be to hard on her..I went to her house on January 24 she did now pick up the phone when i tried calling her that morning i did not expect to see what i did we called 911 rushed her to the hospital and she passed she had a massive stroke in her brain...I have so many emotions going through me,she was alone i hated that, what if i would of got there sooner? I never got to talk to her i did not get to tell her how much i love her how much she ment to me..I am dying inside so much pain..I don't want to be around my grand kids i don't want them to see me cry..This hurt inside me is so hard to deal with ... i m thinking about getting professional help i can't deal with this on my own...I'm truely sorry for all of the people who lost the loved ones..It is a very hard..I would people would not tell me it gets easier as time goes by...This is pain inside me is unexplainable my mom was my best friend i love you mom and miss you sooo much

Jan 08, 2013
Death is not the end...
by: Murdaberzerker

My Mom has been gone for far too long...but she is not really gone. Every day I feel her presence...She is here with me now, she will be here with me tomorrow. When I die we will meet again and all will be forgiven. Don't worry about what has been, worry about what will be. So much time until death. We all live and so we all shall die. When our time is up, our loved ones await. Live life while you can, don't look towards death. The reaper comes for all of us when it's time. Not yet...Not yet...

Jan 06, 2013
response for K. Bergeron
by: Jean

I just read the article for K. Bergeron and am responding but I guess it could be for anyone hurting and feeling the same. I also know what it feels like to lose a mom but just not losing my mom at such a young age of 18. I know that at any age it hurts bad and don't think anybody ever really gets over it. I was 37 when I lost my mom and am now 42 and I still miss her like she left yesterday. I also did not know my mom was sick but found out she knew she was going to pass for a about a year and didn't tell me. I also felt like there was no God and was mad at God because I would see older people at the store still with their moms and think its not fair. I know at 18 this must feel amplified. I know there is a God though. I also lost my 48 year old sister (she had a 4 kids with the youngest being 11 and 6-not fair) last year and felt it again. I miss them so much. Anyway, the night before my sister passed I had a dream that she was eating lunch with my mom and knew it was more then a dream because it felt different. They were happy but I woke up sad. Now I always see mourning doves which my mom loved and I gave an ornament of them to my sister in Dec(she passed Jan 13, 2011-but had a heart attack Jan 8th). Their are 3 doves (I think 1 is my dad) but 2 are always together and they look right at me. I know it is them. God is letting them remind me they are there. After the big sadness goes away then the doves go away for long periods of time. I know that probably sounds stupid- but please don't stop believing in God. Everyone has their own path and sometimes life isn't fair for the ones left behind. I KNOW you will see your mom again like I know I will see my dad, mom, and sister again. Maybe look for signs and they may show up. Think of what was special to the both of you and you may find it. Some people don't believe me about the doves and some do-choose to follow what you believe in your deepest heart of hearts and it will help you heal because all that matters is you anyway. Good luck. I will pray for you. There is a God-He will help you heal.

Jan 05, 2013
I miss my mom too!
by: Kellex Bergeron

Hi everyone my mom passed away on Dec 10,2012 She was only 39 years old and I'm 18. My mom has ATL Lymphoma (blood cancer) she was diagnosed in Sept I believe. I went off to college in August and I had no idea that my mom was sick. she was just telling me that her lymph nodes were giving her trouble and she had to get them under control. I never would have thought it was cancer. When ever I would call and ask how she was doing she would say "Oh in good don't worry about me, how's school going?". I feel bad because while she was in the histoplasmosis suffering I was at school. I feel like I could have spent more time with her. Me and my mom had the perfect relationship and I can truly say she was my best friend. She was a strong believer in Jesus Christ and she was faithful up until her death. But since my mom died, I feel like I have lost my faith. I don't want to go to church, pray, or even talk to God because its just not fair that my mom, who has never been sick a day in her life had to die and leave me and my 16 year old brother here on earth alone. I have always been brought up to believe in Jesus and I know somewhere deep down I still do. I just don't understand this. because when I ask people if I will ever see my mom in heaven or at least know who she is I get all different types of answers, can someone please help me understand?

Dec 26, 2012
MY MOTHER GRACE
by: keith

she passed 5-5-05 @9-05 pm.23 thank you all for sharing is so hard lost my bothers in a car wreck and another to lymphoma cancer.. have never bin the same love to all of you i am 61 now xox hug's keith it is so hard now i have a girl friend with parents in their late 80' and doesn't realize what it will be like when they are gone

Dec 21, 2012
Loss of Mom
by: Amelia

Hello, I am so very sorry for your loss. I lost my Mom in June of 2009 & I know how you are feeling. The hurt seems to ache inside you. Your Mom knew your were there beside her & she is watching over you from heaven. Try to find comfort in your loving memories of her. Listen closely to your heart & you will feel her with you. Merry Christmas! Praying for you.

Dec 16, 2012
Missing my mother
by: Lisa

Today is 8 months since my mother passed away. That Sunday night, I sat, holding my mothers hand until she took her last breath. When we heard the word cancer, we knew it was just a matter of time and boy, did it go by way too quickly. It has not gotten any easier for me either, only harder. Every day is another day that I can't see her, talk to her or go down and just be with her. We put my mom in hospice because there was no way she was going anywhere alone. She was always there for all 6 of her children and I was going to make sure someone was there for her. She put up a good fight, but stage 4 stomach cancer was to consume her. I miss my mom so much. My life will never be the same. The day she died, a part of me died with her. I cry all the time, i just want her to come home. i beg and cry for her, but it is must so hard to accept the fact that she is never coming back to me. It is hard for me to even look at her pictures and I love pictures, but they just remind me of what I am missing. I love you mom, so much. You will never be forgotten !!

Dec 08, 2012
Special to Us
by: A J L F BENNET

No word to speak
No word to console
Mother is very special to us
My mothers journey begun on 28-11-2012

Dec 07, 2012
i feel the same
by: chelsie

My mom passed sway on Dec.19 2011,from cancer we didn't even know she had it till five weeks before she passed she was only 57 I miss her so much I broke down today I want to tell people often how much it hurts and how much I miss her but I don't want to upset my sisters or nieces.I am so sorry for your loss nothingin this world will ever be the same.


Dec 01, 2012
Oh gosh, another day of tears
by: Anonymous

My mom died on June 23, 2012. She was 87 years old. It doesn't matter how old she was or how old I am. She was my very sweet mother and i miss her so very much. She has come to me in a dream once since then. I have had a really hard time dealing with her death but lately, I have been ok. Until today. Sometimes, something happens that makes me so sad. I used to well up all the time--many times a day but I was getting better about that. Today, i just welled up all day. Maybe it has something to do about the holidays. I need to take a class about the circle of life. I am just not accepting of that. My dad died 1 1/2 years before my mom. It is just hard to accept that they are gone after spending so many happy times with them over the years. I can't believe that this is my life now.

Nov 21, 2012
miss you so much Mom
by: Anonymous

My Mom passed away on the 29 december 2011,I miss Her so much it hurt has hell She was my Mom and best friend I ever had,She always wanted a 60th birthday party ans we gave it 2 Her and two day aafter the party she got sick and passed away 2 weeks later not looking forward 2 xmass it will be my fisr year with out Her Love you Mary and my Dad to...;(

Nov 09, 2012
Yes
by: Anonymous

I am a registered nurse. Your mother knew you were there. There's all kinds of evidence, including first hand accounts of people who've been in comas etc, and come around, and they've said there were aware of what people around them were saying etc. Of course she knew you were there. As far as people telling you to move on? Please. You never, ever get over something like this. You simply learn to cope and move on, because that is life and that is what you know you must do and what your mother would want you to do. You want to be there, after all, for your own kids and grandkids. But, you don't get over it. So don't feel bad, or allow others to make you feel bad for not "getting over it." I still have my mom. But, I lost my son at 18, and I lost my grandmothers whom I loved dearly. You don't get over it. You just learn to cope. And, eventually, after time, you will find some joy again. Though the hole the person left when they passed will always be with you, it does get better. My thoughts and prayers are with you. :)

Nov 06, 2012
My mother, my friend, my everything!!!!!!
by: Caroline

I just lost my mother to a failing heart and i too wondered if she was indeed aware that my daughter and i were in the room. You may laugh but i watch long island medium and there were
a few clips or more where she addressed this without the client verbalizing this question and she validates that they do know even if we dont get a hint of this as a person passes away and i am convinced not just from watching her show but i felt that my mom knew.

The only sad thing for me is that i have not dreamt about her or been visited by her and i dont know why cause i asked her to since i was little but no visit.

Nov 01, 2012
She is ALWAYS with you.
by: Anonymous

Perhaps this will help someone. It has been several years (which seem like hours) since I lost my mama. About a month or so afterward, missing her terribly, I was looking through her things. I found a stack of Kennedy half-dollars. My mother was not a collector, so I was in wonder at the stack. That evening, while working at my cashier job at a craft store, I dropped the 13 cents that I owed a young man and his mother. It rolled under the register and I couldn't find it and apologized repeatedly. The young man told me kindly that it wasn't important and walked away after his mother. He stopped, turned and said, "I'm sorry, I'm supposed to give you this." He reached into his pocket as I protested and told him I was the one that owed him. He walked back, telling me to ask his mother - that he sometimes did this. He said he was supposed to give me what was in his hand and handed me a Kennedy half-dollar. Never wonder that your mother is not watching. You cannot doubt it. It keeps me breathing.

Oct 28, 2012
its not easy
by: DC

I have read a lot of comments on here and realize that I am not alone. my Mum died of lung cancer 6 months ago and she spent her last three days in hospital(she never wanted to die in hospital either, but she did)she was in so much pain.
Since she has died I cannot get the hospital part out of mind, seeing her there in so much pain and knowing there was nothing I could do to stop it, I am having nitemares about it as well.
Would like to Say to Debra though that I really do think she will have heard what you said to her, its a known fact that the hearing is the last to go while someone is dying.

Oct 03, 2012
I miss my Mother
by: Diana

I know exactly how you feel. I lost my mother about a month ago. I also be wanted to pick up the phone and talk to her. I miss her sooooooo much. I cry every night wishing that I could bring her back. People also be telling me that I have to move on but Im not ready to let my mom's spirit go. I dont hardly eat or sleep. All I do is cry. The crying really hits me at night time. I dedicate the song "cry" by Nikki Minaj and RiHanna too my mother. I do be praying asking the lord for strength. I also be wondering if my mother would hear me talking to her. I just dont know how to cope with her loss.

Sep 23, 2012
My second post,
by: Anonymous

Hey, I was the first post here, was just googling 'I miss my mum', and found your site again, and recognised my words - my Mum died 9 September, just after 9pm. So a fortnight ago now, but what a weird 2 weeks, and I'm feeling worse I think, hope am typing ok cos crying so hard, is just that it hurts more now than it did when she died. Anyway, I really feel your pain, and it has helped so much to read all these posts, I feel less alone. It is all so weird, and I know it's worse for my
Dad, but I am trying so hard to be strong for him, we cry a bit together, but I don't want him to know how weak and helpless I feel without her.

Sep 19, 2012
love to you
by: Anonymous

my experience re my mum passing was similar. She was unconscious for the last three to four days. She died on 9 September. I miss her so very, very much. I know it's harder for my Dad in so many ways, and I am staying strong for him and my children in front of them all, but after I've said goodnight to them and called him goodnight,that's when I get the chance to stop, and I realise how very hard it all is. I miss her, and I love her. I still can't really grasp that I will never share all the silly little daily things with her again - things that would bore my husband or my friends, and that would be the same for her, just silly little daily conversations we had.

Sep 05, 2012
I wish,,,,
by: Tomika

My mom was diagnosed with first kidney failure on Nov. 29, 2011. She was in an induced comma for a week and we were told she would recover but need dialysis. I gave up my home to move home with her...As the next month went on we discovered the reason for kidney failure was stage 3 cervical cancer and it had spread through her body. Top it off with heart disease...The following month she was told at best even with fighting the cancer she had 6 months to a yr. She wanted to fight to live...even though the dr recommended she not. The last week of her life she spent in a hospital...where the drs told her that her heart couldn't handle dialysis anymore. With out it they said 2 weeks tops was her lifespan. They suggested hospice care cause She wanted to come home. She came home Thursday night.Telling all who would hear that she was going to live for at least 2 months...though she prayed she would make it 2 more yrs so her and my dad could be together 40 yrs. The hospice nurse saw her friday and said she would be shocked if she had to return the following monday. Friday night the pain set in on my mom and I held her like a child, sitting in the bed hospice provided. I kept telling her I was there for her. I wouldn't leave her. She said she knew I wasn't leaving her. And that was one of the last things she said to me. She made it til Sunday, July 1, 2012. I was standing beside her bed with my hand on her when her last breath was taken. I laid my head on her chest and listened for a heart that didn't beat anymore. I was the one to pronounce her gone, amid tears and yelling at her to come back. Telling her I wasn't ready yet.
I think about her all the time. I talk to her urn. I wish she was here. I drive past places she use to enjoy going and the pain it causes me is sometimes more than I can stand. It has been 2 months and 4 days now and the pain of losing her hits harder now than it did when she first passed. I wanna pick up the phone and call her. Hear the stories of the things in her house that she valued again. I never thought my mom would leave me. Even when she got sick I thought something would fix her. My mom was 57 when she passed...way too young to leave me. She went shopping the day before she went to the hospital. She bought clothes she never got to wear. I am angry. Its not fair.
My dad wants her house cleared out. He speaks about other women. Wanting to hold someone. He doesn't want to see or show tears. I cry alone. Its killing me.

Sep 03, 2012
11/10/2011
by: Amanda

My mom died two weeks after a surprise lung cancer diagnosis. She was my go-to for advice, and comfort, and laughs when my marriage or work felt like too much. I have no father. She an only child, left a disabled son, her elderly parents, and a daughter (me) who doesn't know how to help any of them.

She was a quiet and often lonely person. She didn't have friends or date. She had recently overcome her struggles with alcoholism when she passed. Looking back on her life feel so overwhelmed by anger and sadness. How unfair that her life improved just in time to die.

She was funny. People didn't know that because she kept to herself. She was also very good with animals. Even creepy little critters no one else could stand.

Her name was Debra J. York. She was 54 years old.

Sep 01, 2012
I love you mom
by: Rachael

My mom died in 2005 and it still hurts. She died from ALS and suffered dearly from this disease. She begged to die and this tore me up inside everytime I would hear her say it. The last few months of her life she couldn't talk anymore, but she could talk to me with me eyes. I miss her everyday and would do anything to be able to talk to her one more time. She was my Tara just like Scarlett in Gone with the Wind got her strength from Tara. I feel so lost without her. I wrote this poem to say at her funeral. This was the hardest day of my life.

Angel's Above

As I look up at the sky
I wonder why
When all I prayed for
Was a little more time

You were my mother and my friend
I just can’t accept that this is the end
I know you were waiting for this day
But, am I selfish for wanting you to stay

Today I may sober, cry and moan
But, I know I will not be alone
There is family, friends, and loved ones to
Who will be sadden and simply blue

Sometimes you probably think I didn’t care
I was always praying for your life to be spared
Every time I saw you a little part of me died
My tears were so hard to hold inside

I know your eyes shined when you saw that heavenly man
My heart wanted to stop when he reached out for your hand
Now you are in heaven with all the angels above
Today we will celebrate on how much you were loved.

I miss you already and I wish you were here
It seems so empty with you up there.

Rachael Painter

Aug 31, 2012
Alwsys my Momster
by: Anonymous

Mom,

I miss you so much I am googling your name. Knowing it would hurt if I found anything, knowing the surprise would lead to inevitable pain, but doing it anyway as it feels like a way to be close to you. You died 6/12/05. It doesn't get any easier. You said it would but I think you knew it wasn't true, you were just trying to protect me as always. I love you so much for that.

I want you to know I am doing ok. I may not look like it, but I am and I hope wherever you are it's good.

I wish I could talk to you. I wish it was one of those times we sipped coffee and smoked cigarettes and just laughed and babbled and sometimes cried. I love you, I love you, I love you.

I hope I did right by you at the end. You know I was hurting and I know you were too.

I love you long-time, Momster.

Your kid,
Mis

Aug 30, 2012
miss you... :-(
by: Anonymous

I lost my Mom 11/23/2011... i am still in shock over this and not sure if time does really heal anything. It seems like the more time that goes by the more i miss her. I lost my dad in December from cancer at 63 and then not even a year later my mom from cancer and she was only 59. Sometimes i am so angry and dont understand how this could possibly happen so close together. I had three months with my mom after she was diagnosed... i will never forget those three months. she could not even get out of bed, but i refused to let her in a nursing home. i just couldnt do it and she didnt want to go. i have no regrets. the only thing i am thankful for is that i had such wonderful parents, because some people never have that. one thing i have learned through this is that i am a lot stronger than i ever knew, and i will always try to make them proud.

Aug 23, 2012
I miss my mom
by: Anonymous

I really miss my mom, we lost her nearly 4 years ago. But I still miss her the same. People say time heals, but I think time just helps you find a way to deal. I cry alone also just so I dont make others feel bad or sad. I need tell her so much, some things to laugh with her about, some to cry & some to brag. I often wonder if I did enough for her because she did so much for & I feel I took her for granted alot of years. God forgive me for taking my mom for granted. Seems funny, lately I been dreaming about her more & been more lonesome. I still remember the morning she passed, I sat by her side for about 4 hours & it seemed like 5 minutes. I felt like I couldnt get up to walk away. The hospital staff kept asking if we were ready for the funeral home to come after her. I couldnt answer, I was still trying to figure out if everything was real & my mom was really gone. I am very lonesome for my mom, but i would like to give encouragement to everyone to please grieve but go on with your lives. Please I nearly lost my family from blocking them out & being angry, lonely over the loss of my mom. So please remember the loved ones you still have here with you. I will keep all of you in my prayers, as we share the same grief.

Aug 22, 2012
I miss my mom live is horrible without her
by: Carla

On Oct.12,2011 my mom died she was 52 years old. Two weeks prior she had feel off a ladder & hurt her knee went to the doctor & he said it was sprang to stay off of it. Come to find out it was a blood clot that broke off & killed her instantly. I miss her so much. My world has crumbled since she Is gone. There are days I feel like I can't go on. Please pray for me. I Love You Mom!! Brenda M. Runnels

Aug 15, 2012
Still in disbelief
by: Anonymous

My mom died on June 12, 2012 at the age of 68. She had a bad heart and was on dialysis the past 3 years which was missable I watched her everyday being very I'll. In December they gave us the bad news that my mom had 4 heart attacks and that their was nothing more they could do. More or less told us the last next one would be her last. She was still alert and talking everyday so I really think I did not believe it was going to happen. But it did my dad called early and said he woke her to get ready for dialysis and she ask him to spray nitro and then he turned and she fell over of a massive heart attack. He called Amed and they more or less said she was gone but put a vent on her and took her tot he hospital where the next day we had to say goodbye. They tried the cooling process to wake up her brain. I miss her so bad. Yesterday was 2 months but seems like it was just yesterday. We were very close talked everyday. She was my best friend. Ive been married 32 years 4 kids and just got my 4 th grandchild on Sunday. It was hard that I couldn't call and tell her. I know how everyone here is feeling. I am 50 years old and still need my mom. As far as my faith I don't know what I believe. I am searching. Their is so much evil in the world it's hard to believe. My mom was a loving caring women and everyday months before she died she would tell us I will love you forever after every conversation. I know she knew it was close but never talked about that. Sometimes I wish she would have. Missing my mom terribly. Melanie

Aug 07, 2012
Thanks for sharing
by: Adam Carson

My mother passed last week (8/2/12) and I have been devasted but I can see through your story how much worse it could have been having to go through the trauma of a lingering hospital passing. Ma died peacefully in her sleep and I've tried to take comfort in that but the pain still won't leave as her passing leaves such an empty hole in my life. My condolences to you and all the others who have shared their stories here. Losing your mom is probably the worst thing that can happen in ones life. The nights are the worst as whenever I wake up my mind immediatly says "She's Gone". I just want her back so bad I'd give anything I have.

Jul 09, 2012
I miss my mom so much I don't thing I will make it
by: Debra

My mom died on 5/16/2012, and I miss her so much. Sometimes I do not think I can make it without her. She was not only my mom but my best friend. I spent all my time with her.She was ill for a long time but did not want go to the hospital.The Tuesday morning after Mother's Day I could see there was something very wrong and took her to the hospital. She had developed an infection which took her life. I regret taking her to the hospital because I know she did not want to die there.The Nurses would not let me stay with her on Tuesday night and Wednesday morning when I returned she was just lying there with her eyes closed and not responding. I tried to tell her I loved her and was sorry for leaving her that night but I don't think she heard me. I cry day and night that she died thinking I did not love or care for her. She was my world. Hopefully I will see her again in Heaven.

Jun 03, 2012
I miss my mamma
by: kimberly walls

My mother was the sweetest woman on the planet..went to church every Sunday...a good christian woman...always there for her family and friends...you could have met her in a grocery store and loved her!!! She was killed by a drunk driver on May 23rd of 2010...we all went to court every time and the guy was an illegal and couldn't speak english!!! But he did get 9yrs and 6 months!! So I guess we are thankful for the punishment...but we miss our sweet angel every day!!!

May 03, 2012
I miss my mama and my sister
by: Anonymous

As we approach another Mothers day my heart is filled with grief because i miss my mother and sister so very much. It will soon be five years since my sister died of lung cancer and almost four for my mom who died of a broken heart from watching her daughter die a horrible death from lung cancer. Mama will never know my grand children when i have some and that really breaks my heart, i really miss calling her and my sister, i would give almost anything just to hear their voices again. My sister has two grown daughters when she left and a 12 year old son who is now turning 17 and it has been sad and painful for us all. I know that God has not forgotten about i guess this is just a part of my life i have to learn to accept. Love you mama and Vivian, miss you both tooooooo much.

Apr 10, 2012
Mom~I miss you everyday!
by: Anonymous

About 20 years ago...diagnosed borderline diabetic...fast forward a couple of years to definately diabetic...fast forward a couple more years to congestive heart failure...then diabetic nueropathy...high blood pressure...fast forward to 2-3 years ago-kidney failure start dialysis...uterine cancer start radiation...radiation did not work...too many health problems for a hysterectomy...and then an antibiotic resistant infection...deteriorating before our eyes in the hospital...3 months later off to hospice...2 days later crying over her, knowing that my life will never feel the same...knowing that even though I had known for a bit that it was coming-there was no preparing. It's been 4 months and still I am driving in my car last night bawling my eyes out because I want to call her so bad it hurts...and it breaks my heart that I can't. She always told me she was so glad that I took better care of myself than she ever did...but man, 20 years ago she could have changed the path of this thing. Don't ignore the doctors when they say you need to quit eating junk or get more exercise or whatever...because whatever temporary pleasure that you might receive from one more piece of cake, one more cigarette,...whatever your "poison" may be will never be enough to make it work 3 months in bed in pain with your loved ones praying for your life!

Apr 05, 2012
I so dearly miss you Mom
by: Anonymous

I miss you very much dear mother. You were my eternal friend.

My mom was an enterprising and industrious woman. I had the the best 13 months of my life with my mom at the end of her life with me when we finally broke down and brought her to the nursing home. It was hard bring her there but she needed the attention and care that we could not give her.

She finally gave in to the cancer that finally took her. I resisted until the end to let her go though I knew well she would leave us eventually. Finally the Lord came down and took her by the hand. I'm ok with that now, not about her dying. There were still so many things that I wanted to say to her. I always said I love you, and I always meant it.

I found a poem that I don't know who wrote that I thought very appropriate for her and it says:

“To Those I Love And To Those Who Love Me”
When I am gone, Release me, let me go
I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn’t tie yourself to me with tears;
Be happy we had so many years.
I give you my love,
You can only guess how much you gave to me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you have shown me;
But now it’s time that I travel alone.
So grieve a while for me, If grieve you must.
Then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It’s only for a while that we must part,
So bless the memories within your heart.
I won’t be far away for life goes on.
So if you need me,
Call me and I will be near.
And if you listen with your heart,
You’ll hear All my love around you, Soft and clear.
And when you must come along this way,
I’ll greet you with a Smile,
And “Welcome you Home”.

I love you mom!

Mar 23, 2012
I too
by: Susan H

I lost my Mom 9/29/12. Just sold her house beautiful home today. It's so tough letting go. I am still hurting an miss her terribly. Even though she was 90!! She was a spunky and viable 90...she will always remain a part of who I am and the woman I am today...rest now Mom!!

Mar 18, 2012
I miss you Mom
by: Anonymous

My mom died from liver cancer after being diagnosed 5 days before...It was such a shock to see a woman who did so much and had a memory like an encyclopedia to slip into coma and only respond when she was in pain...She died on Feb 3, 2012 at 6:40 in the morning with me by her side. I miss her so much. There are days that all I want to do is pick up the phone and call her or go to her house and visit. We talked almost everyday on the phone and I feel like a piece of me died when she did. She has been gone now for about 5 weeks and it seems like years...I pray for her everyday that she is in heaven and resting in peace. I miss you Mom more than words can describe....

Mar 12, 2012
unreal
by: Anonymous

I can't believe my mom is gone! She passed away about 5 weeks ago and I can't accept it. She was always supposed to be here. I look for her in the house. I can smell her perfume. My dad misses her so after 50 yrs. of marriage. She was 84 and I'm 46, but I'm still just a little girl missing her mom.

Feb 25, 2012
thank you mom!!!!!!
by: Anonymous

My mom died 12 yrs ago from phen phen .... I miss just saying mamma!!!!! Just stopping and thinking about her makes my heart thankful for her ..... and thank you lord for giving me the gift of her!!!!!!! I'm married with two kids ...... I love you momma!!!! Shawn boudreau

Feb 23, 2012
I miss my mom
by: Anonymous

I lost my mom November 9, 2011 to lung cancer after she had only been diagnosed for three months. My mom never gave up. She continued to try to clean house and do laundry or anything she could to keep busy. She refused to lay down and let the disease beat her. My mom was a beautiful small petite dark skinned woman that loved life and loved her family. She had six children and my dad of 51 years. I still sometimes can't believe she is gone and it hurts so bad it makes me weak and sick to my stomach. Sometimes I think of something and think " I should call mom and tell her about this ", then I realize I can't and the hurt starts again. I cry out of the blue sometimes just because of a single thought or a vision of her face. This has been the worst thing I have ever had to deal with. I was by her side when she died and wouldn't have traded that for the world, I just wish I could hold her in my arms and tell her again how much I love her.

Feb 21, 2012
I miss my mom
by: Anonymous

My Mom died from brain cancer a month ago. She suffered for 15 months. I miss her so much that I can't even write about it yet. I feel like there is a heavy block laying on my chest.

Feb 19, 2012
I,m Free Moma said to me
by: Moma SickAnonymous

Moma I miss you so much that I can,t hear your voice,I don,t see your smile,I can,t have you at work with me as the team we,ve been for 24 years.Lord I got the opportunity to work with my mom all of my work career,that was a plus and I just wanna say thank you.My mother died of cancer 8 months ago and I,m not handling it well personally,but I get away with showing it in the presence of others.It,s like a smothering effect but because I know she built me to be a strong species and this is not the only hurdle.Help me to understand this severity of pain.Cancer approach all families of all walks of life,I was terrified when it knocked on our door just like everyone who know.If you ever end up in a cancer pod with a loved one or it be you with cancer,it,s a world of people that have a vision of not quitting,we complain about things we can change,but they have no options and still believe!It,s a wow effect!

Feb 13, 2012
Hurting
by: Jason

My mom died three weeks ago from cancer. I stayed at her side all through her last night and the next day she died as I held her. I act like I'm okay but that experience has really scarred my mind and heart and I can't get the images out of my head. I'm a 44 year old man but I feel like I'm 8. I really miss the sound of her voice.

Feb 12, 2012
I'll Never Stop Loving My Mom
by: Anonymous

At three months without my beautiful mother, I am sometimes still so shattered emotionally...and in so much pain. I was able to weather the loss of my beloved grandparents, my Dad and my sister .... because I had Mom with me to help ease the pain.

Now I am an orphan and no one can console me. I have days that are better, even laugh and enjoy my life at times. But then the pain hits me and I can not stop thinking about my childhood with my family. They were all present, all the time. My entire extended family lived in the same little community forever. Now most of them are gone. I don't have children so I have no next generation to share my pain with me. I have amazing nieces and nephews but we are now separated by geography. I want to go home and feel my mother's love...even if just once more. I would always return home feeling like the conquering hero....an anticipated return full of love and joy. No one waves goodbye to me from the front window any longer. No one to wipe my tears and tell me it will be alright. I hurt and miss her friendship, smile and love to the point of physical exhaustion.

Jan 30, 2012
I miss my mom and sis
by: Jean

Five years ago I lost my mom. It hurt so bad and to this day I miss her very much. After she passed away I found out from one of her friends that she knew she was dying but she made her friend promise not to tell anyone. I miss doing all of her errands for her and with her. I miss having that person I can call anytime and who truly cares. I was mad at her for not sharing what she knew but am ok now and know she didn't want anyone to worry about her. I didn't think I could miss anyone more. Then this year my 48 year old 1 and only sister passed away. She left behind 4 kids with the youngest 2 being 11 and 6. Her 6 year old girl thinks mommy left because she didn't clean her room when she was asked. This time the pain is even worse. My sister was sick for awhile but we never thought she would go. She was going to the hospital and was on antibiotics because she got pnuemonia. Her appt was the next morning but then she had a heart attack and her little ones were there screaming when she got CPR. I hurt for me but more for her kids. I am doing the best I can to help them but it will never be enough. They need mommy. I know there is a God but sometimes it doesn't feel like there is. Please pray for all of us. I will pray for everyone here too.

Jan 03, 2012
It's been almost a year
by: Anonymous

and I miss my mom more and more every day. Sometimes I dream she's still alive and I'm shocked when I wake up that she's not. Sometimes I cry and cry in my dreams and wake up exhausted from it. Sometimes I just ask her to visit me in my dreams and give me strength.

I love you mom, I love and miss you.
I hate you cancer. A cure can't come soon enough.

Dec 19, 2011
mom knew
by: Anonymous

Our mom passed just yesterday, she was cancer free for one year, then came bone cancer, for 3 days moms eyes were closed gasping with everybreath. she had 1 foot in this world and 1 in the next. 6 children a husband and 2 sisters came 600 miles. mom waited. she passed shortly after her sisters arrived. we held hands said a prayer together told her we were all here and it was ok to let go, mom's eyes gently opened as if to say i know your here, moments later she was gone. Do we attend church every week? No but we needed to know mom knew we were there. god answered our prayers. through all the pain, he gave us peace

Oct 31, 2011
The pain will never cease but the memories remain
by: Anonymous

I lost my Mother 8 months ago very suddenly and not expecting anything was wrong - quite shockingly. It hurts every day and I think of her and wish I could talk to her and share my life with her. All you have is your memories. Try and be happy with that, albeit hard at times. That is all we get now though so we have to learn to make due. Cherish the fact that you had someone who understood you, loved you and wanted only the best for you in life and it will fill your heart with comfort to know that you had a relationship with a special woman that will last your lifetime.
I am sorry for your loss and we are in this all together- carry on with your life and live it so that your mother would always be proud. God Bless!

Aug 22, 2011
Missing Momma
by: Jeneva Kay

My Mother fell from a river bank and landed on her head from a 12 foot drop. She lingered for 8 days on life support. We lost her on June 11 2011. She was only 60 years old. I miss her so very much. I didn't realize how much she was my best and only friend. I cry every day. She was so precious.

Jul 11, 2011
There are Great People in this World
by: Anonymous

Dear Family, I lost my Dad when I was in my 30 and what a loss that was but I had a dream about my Dad. When I woke this thought stayed in my mind. Life is a invitation and with most invitation we have to RSVP and if that invitation came in the mail today with dates and time that would be shared with you and your Mom would you do it all again, knowing this time the exact date it would be over? I know my answer was yes and I'm pretty sure yours would be too. Hang in there and remember there is probably someone in your community suffering the loss of a family remember longing to still be a Mom or Grandmother! We are not alone when we continue to reach out and Love! Remember you will see her again in the kindness of others.

Jan 26, 2011
MY Rock and best friend
by: Anonymous

My mom was killed in auto accident on Nov. 22nd. I was talking to her on Computer and she used pager then 25 minutes later, she was hit by train. We are both Deaf. My mom was talking to my dad, in America Sign Language about me then she noticed train arm was down, but it was too late. It took my mom's life. I was heartbroken and devastated. I did not realize what I have lost until she is gone.

I cry daily. Her Urn will be buried on my 40th birthday next month. I do not know if she would see her last child turning 40th. She has 4 children. We were very close, unlike other siblings. We lived together, she helped raising my Deaf daughter. It is very painful going on daily. Not being able to talk to her on Video Phone daily. She was very involved in my life and my daughter's life. She was healthy but why did it have to happen? I just don't understand.

Aug 12, 2010
Poem
by: Judy

I lost my mom in August 2008 to pancreatic cancer. She survived a horrible surgery to restructure her entire digestive system, went through rehab and came home. But the cancer was too aggressive. I promised to bring her home, and did, and she had 17 days. The first 10 she spent saying goodbye to friends and family. But yet she asked - "Can't I beat this?" She was unresponsive the last few days.

Time does allow you to move forward but you'll still miss your mom and the special friendship you shared. No one can take her place.

I enjoyed the poem that was shared. This one is special to me:

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the autumn?s gentle rain.
When you awaken in the morning?s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die.

Mary Frye, 1935


May time comfort and heal you.

Jul 24, 2010
Your Mom lives on in you
by: Emily

I lost my Mom in September of 2008, to cancer.
My sister and I cared for her up until her death. She died at home with us close by.
I miss talking to her everyday. Now that I am facing health challenges of my own I miss her more than ever.

I feel her presence, I feel her touch. Even though her physical persona is gone her spirit lingers.

I see my mothers face and hear her voice in my sister and my nieces.

Sometimes people don't understand that I still grieve, I will never get over losing her.
She was my friend and my traveling companion. We enjoyed shopping at Goodwill and Salvation Army together. For the longest time I couldn't stand to go shopping with out her.

The fact that we lost my Mom and her 2 sisters in 18 months has been hard on all of us. I have tried to keep in touch with my cousins but we all have so many calls on our time.

I will miss her forever but, the pain is diminishing with time.
Blessings and comfort to all

Jun 14, 2010
missing my mom=(
by: michelle

I lost my mom 5 months ago=( she had cancer it was the worst feeling in this world I miss her with every beat of my heart I think about her every day that passes by! I love u and miss u with all my heart!

May 21, 2010
Sad in Alabama
by: L.T.M.

Hello, I lost my mother on May 10th 2010 and we buried her on May 15th. I am still in unbelief. The day after mother's day and I didn't see it coming. Yes she was ill but not to the point of death, or so we thought.

I can't describe how the pain is in my life right now. I've cried, and I've laughed, I've even been angry. But I will tell you this, that it is the Lord who is my strength that is keeping me. I miss her so very much because she and I were very close and it hurts not being able to pick up the phone and talk to her and just knowing that I can't go by her house anymore to take my baby girl to say hello is devastating.

But the bible says, "to be absent from the body, is to be present with the Lord" and I know my mother is in heaven with her Master and she's happy. To be honest, they wouldn't come back here even if they wanted to because heaven is so much better. Keep your head up and just know that you will see your mother again and so will I. She's in the grandstand of heaven cheering you on so make her proud. My prayers to you and your family and we all will get through this hard time.

May 07, 2010
My Mom
by: Anonymous

Two of my favorite quotes: both paraphrased:
Helen Keller: The ones you love you will never lose, they become a part of you!

Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones shines down to let us know they are with us!

I lost my Momma August 1999 - it was the most devastating day of my life! I cry every time I think of her still. Momma's are the closest "flesh and blood" we have on this earth.
She will always be a part of me while I am on this earth..can't wait to see her when I get to Heaven!

Apr 27, 2010
i miss my mom sooo much
by: tisha

i just lost my mom april 5th 2010 .. not even a month ago... i feel as though i am losing it at times ... i can't handle the thought of never talking to her again ...she had just turned 50yrs old feb. 24th ...she had been fighting breast cancer for the past 3yrs ..i just never thought she would lose the fight she was so strong.... i miss her so much it hurts to breath sometimes..i pray she knows how much she meant to me. She was not only my mother but my best friend, my much needed phone call, my get-away...i feel sooo lost

Jan 10, 2010
I'll never forget my mom
by: Anonymous

I lost my mom in Aug. '09 and am still in shock and disbelief. I was an only child and she and I were like best friends, even though she definitely was a mother who expected the highest standards from me. She made me everything I am today.

Even though she was 82, her death was sudden, a stroke, and she was in hospice for two weeks totally unresponsive, so I had no time to say "goodbye". That's what makes me the saddest - no goodbye. But I have had three dreams about her which were very real and I think she was communicating with me.

So I want to tell everyone who is suffering and grieving, YOUR MOM IS THERE, no matter the circumstances of her passing. She is your guardian angel, watches over you and you can talk to her through the angels or God.

NO ONE will ever take the place of my mother and I know she would want me to try to go on somehow; but at this time, it is almost impossible. So you are not alone, there are many of us out here crying daily and trying to cope. It is extremely difficult and only through her love and God's love will you survive. Love to you all....

Nov 15, 2009
I Do Understand!
by: Wendy

I miss my mom, too. And "they" say (whoever "they" may be) that time heals. Well, it's been five years and I still miss her terribly. Sure, we go on - but we always will miss them. That never changes.

As time passes, it's easier to get through and we cope, yet we always will miss them.

It's okay to miss your mom and it's normal to feel sad, whether it happened last month or 20 years ago.

Don't stop living your own life. She wouldn't have wanted you to stop your life because hers had ended. Honor her by being the best you that you can be.
((hugs))

Oct 04, 2009
Peace, prayers and blessing to you. This poem helps me. My mom past in Oct, 2008.
by: Janet

Dear daughter, please don't mourn for me
I'm still here, though you don't see.
I'm right by your side each night and day
And within your heart I long to stay.
My body is gone but I'm always near.
I'm everything you feel, see or hear.

My spirit is free, but I'll never depart
As long as you keep me alive in your heart.
I'll never wander out of your sight-
I'm the brightest star on a summer night.

I'll never be beyond your reach-
I'm the warm moist sand when you're at the beach.
I'm the colorful leaves when Autumn's around
And the pure white snow that blankets the ground.

I'm the beautiful flowers of which you're so fond,
The clear cool water in a quiet pond.
I'm the first bright blossom you'll see in the spring,
The first warm raindrop that April will bring.

I'm the first ray of light when the sun starts to shine,
And you'll see that the face in the moon is mine.
When you start thinking there's no one to love you,
You can talk to me through the Lord above you.

I'll whisper my answer through the leaves on the trees,
And you'll feel my presence in the soft summer breeze.

I'm the hot salty tears that flow when you weep
And the beautiful dreams that come while you sleep.
I'm the smile you see on a baby's face.
Just look for me, daughter dear, I'm every place!


Sep 01, 2009
Yes she knew
by: Angel

I am sorry for your loss.. I lost my mommy may 08. She was my everything! I believe they know whats going on around them. She felt your presence and heard your words!

It dont seem real to me until like you said, something happens funny or sad and my first response is to pick up the phone and dial her number. I kept the phone on for over a yr. It was harder to keep it ringing knowin she wasnt going to pick up.

I miss her laughter the most.. she had a giggle that made you laugh even if you had no clue of what she was laughin at.. contagious it was.. she had eye surgery about five yrs ago and we cry when we laugh ..

I can still hear her tellin me Stop it angel! It hurts when i cry, all the while makin me laugh harder. We were blessed with lovin caring humorous mommies.. cherish the memories and carry on the best you can! Keep your head up! In closin Id like to say thank you for sharing, made me cry but it is a good cry. You have a blessed life!

Aug 08, 2009
5 months
by: Anonymous

I'm very sorry to hear about your mom, i can tell you, i know how you're feeling because i lost my mom 5 months ago. People who have not had the loss of a parent will never understand the eternal grief that we will share for the rest of our lives.

My god do i miss my mom so much and when i think of the holidays coming it just makes me sad. Her cooking, her smiles and the traditional things she did will remain in my heart forever. I can't imagine what the next 5 months will bring? More tears and sadness i'm sure. God bless you and good luck.

May 08, 2009
Yes!!!
by: Laura

I am sure your mom knew you and your sisters were there. I volunteer at a comfort care home for the dying and that is what they always tell us-the dying know you are there. I held my Dad's hand a year ago today as he died- we had to take him off the ventilator. I like to think he passed knowing his family was all around him. May God Bless you.......

Apr 24, 2009
Loneliness is Hard
by: Debbie

Hello my friend, I too lost someone very special, just this past February. He was the love of my life. I have lots of pain and hurt, but I now know that he is peacefully resting. He too suffered from an illness.

I have come to terms with it now, I know it's only been over 2 months now, but I understand that God has his plan for all of us. Only He knows the time of our death. My love is in Heaven and I am good with that. It will always hurt and I will always shed tears over his loss. No more selfish thinking for me. He no longer suffers, and that is truly a blessing.

I miss him like crazy but am going to be okay. Nothing can bring him back, so I must also move on in my life. He would have wanted me to continue doing good in life. My comfort comes in knowing that I will be with him again someday, when my time is done here on earth.

Apr 22, 2009
Give Time, Time
by: Anonymous

Dear Tina,

I am so very sorry for your loss. A month is a very short time for anyone to expect you to "get on with your life," however, having lost my son two months ago, I know that many people do expect that.

My gosh, at one month, you're probably still experiencing the fog that we find ourselves in following the death of our loved one. Others don't get it because, until they experience a profound loss like ours, they won't get it. Forgive them and find at least one person who does allow you to talk, feel, cry or just be silent when you need to.

Give time, time. It has been helpful to me to attend a grief support group specific to my son's death where I can cry, feel, talk, say my son's name over and over if I want, where people understand the "mess in my mind" because they are there too.

I wish you well. LC

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