I miss you my son and I love you greatly. Kevin Beebe died March 6th 2011

by Tina Grose
(Ohio)




On March 6th 2011 my life changed forever. I received a phone call at 2:46am it appeared as my mom calling so of course I thought something happened to her. On the other end was a officer and of course I said right way what is wrong with my mom?? The officer said your mom is fine so I couldn't even think why he was calling me. The officer then went on to say I don't even know how to say this to you so I'm going to just say it. Your son Kevin Beebe died tonight by a drunk driver. I didn't even believe him and I went on to say their has been a mistake. The officer then said there has been no mistake. He then asked if I had anyone that could be there. I said I'm fine. I then hung up the phone and just sat on the floor feeling so numb. It took awhile before I could even cry. I then realized what the officer had said and I began to cry and then I started hitting the wall and said this isn't true!!! So I can say my life was over that day. It will be three years in a month and I can say the pain is so raw and never goes way. I haven't gone through all the grieving yet because two weeks after this happened my mom had a stroke and I had to come home to take care of her so I haven't had the time to grieve. I'm still taking care of my mom and find my self so lost in life and even at times feel as if I cant go on. I cant think or remember anything. I hope someone could help counseling hasn't done anything for me.

Comments for I miss you my son and I love you greatly. Kevin Beebe died March 6th 2011

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Mar 12, 2014
Your Son
by: Doreen UK

Kate I am sorry for your loss of your child/adult child. You are still struggling after 14 months and feel that nothing has changed. Perhaps you are stuck in grief and could benefit from a few sessions with a grief counsellor to help you move forward. Also one can be numb and it could take longer to thaw out and start to feel. This is what happened to me. Often we have no control over numbness and being stuck in grief. It just happens. It just prolongs our sorrow. But the best way I found on this site is: TAKING ONE DAY AT A TIME. It is only TIME that will heal us from our loss and this could take many years. You just need some support so the pain gets less and you don't prolong this raw pain of grief for yourself. God is our Healer and reaching out Him helps but also counsellors who have skills can use them to get us to the point we need to so that we can go through each day better. You will get your life back, and you will find life after grief. The time it takes to get there is different for each of us. Just be patient with yourself. Give yourself lots of pampering and doing special things for yourself. This is the best foundation to healing from grief. Often when we have no one to spoil us we have to do it for ourselves. IT WORKS. Knowing God. Is knowing we will see our loved one's again. Never give up HOPE. This is all we have. God go with you and give you His Love, Peace, and Healing from your sorrow and loss.

Mar 12, 2014
The Loss of a child
by: Doreen UK

Kay I am sorry for your loss of your daughter. I was angry also with God for not healing my husband from Cancer. I had strong Faith for healing and when he died half of me died with him. I couldn't function for 6 months. Taking one day at a time I started to heal and able to take on the challenges of each day. Between God and Counselling you will find life changes albeit it slower than we would want. Healing is always slow and very painful from counselling but the pain is worth the GAIN. My life changed dramatically for the better. When one is in grief. They feel they will be this way forever. They can't visualise any change. But when it happens you will be amazed at how you can cope with life better. God takes us through grief and without him our struggles would be greater. I know you will get through this as I did and just wanted to offer you encouragement and God's Blessings on your life.

Mar 12, 2014
Thank you
by: Anonymous

Kay I'm so sorry :( I feel your pain and I pray that you and I will find some peace with this . I'm also going to look into other concealing. May God be with you and all of us out there going through these things we should never have to go through. Thank you everyone for writing on this page it helps to hear others talk about how they deal with this maddness...

Mar 11, 2014
The loss of a child
by: Kay

I lost my daughter in a car accident in 2005 from blunt force trama. She was my baby at 25 years old. It does get easier. It took 5 years for me to even want to live. Still I'm not happy I feel lost with no hope. I pretend I'm ok but I'm not. I feel emotionally drained. I don't really care about anything. I blamed god because I knew he could have saved her. Just keep fighting to SURVIVE. I'm to the point now that I'm going to get help. I don't want to live feeling this way. Between God and counseling I pray I can feel some peace. Plz don't wait as long as I have. Holding it in hasn't helped me. Pray for me that I can find hope peace and happiness again. I know our kids wouldn't want us to live this way. They would want us to live and be happy.

Feb 08, 2014
Your son
by: Kate

I'm so sorry you are still in such grief,I keep hoping I will get better and not hurt to the core of my soul but 14 months later,I am struggling because it isn't happening,I'm not healing it seems even tho the pain is so deep and I want to,I can't stop the inner sorrow.sounds like you are there too. Mothers know this horrid pain when we loose our child. My heart feel your sorrow. Now you are helping another when you need help yourself.you have been brave and I know it is not easy. How do we do it?! One day at a time is all I know. Some days are not as bad as others,but we go on. Truly God has to heal all the heartbroken at death in Revelation as it says at the 21 st
Chapter. I'm so sorry for your loss and all on the site who have to face death of our loves. God be with you and me and all others worldwide.

Feb 08, 2014
This is what my late son told me this morning to tell you!
by: Fabio

Hi, my name is fabio, i to lost my only child 8 months ago , in a tragic motorbike incident, but this morning i took a look at your post and my son voice told me that i had to tell you that kevin is there with my son and he wants you to know he loves you so much , and he s very happy with all the angels up there. ,he want s you to talk about him as he was there next to as he is anyway, also he would love you to take your mum to lunch ,at he s favourite restaurant ,in ohio or something ,pain will never live you as the some for me ,but in time i hope we learn how to tollerate bit better ,i hope this would make you feel little better , i m not a psychic , but i meditate daily and i v learn how to listen to my son , you to can do this go on. You tube and look for lillian eden will help you believe me , all the best for the future ...... Xxxx

Feb 08, 2014
tina
by: dianne

My heart goes out to you Tina for your loss of Kevin I to lost my son in July just gone suddenly he was 21 I haven't been counseling like you I just try to keep busy its been just six months for me but whether it was 6 wks yrs or more I do not think we will ever not miss them we just have to carry on day at a time we will always have the love for them in our hearts like we did the day they were born a part of me went with Paul there's an emptiness in my heart and I know I will have good and bad days I can imagine your anger about the driver and to receive a call like that I don't know all's I can say is you are not alone Kevin will always be in your heart I think we just learn to live with our losses and remember the many happy days and good times we were lucky enough to have shared with them hugs from one mum to another who shares the roller coaster of emotions we go through I hope in time we mend even just a little x

Feb 08, 2014
I miss you my son and I love you greatly. Kevin Beebe died March 6th 2011
by: Doreen UK

Tina I am sorry for your loss of your young son Kevin to a sudden death. This news must have been the worst ever. I remember my husband and I in the Professor's waiting room and he very clinically said. "Oh you have an incurable, inoperable, aggressive lung cancer and we will start Chemotherapy immediately." My life passed so fast before me and I felt as if I would die knowing my husband of 44yrs. who I loved deeply was going to die. I cried and cried in the nurses office and couldn't believe what was happening. That was the day my grief started. 28th March 2009. I nursed him for 3yrs.39days with a horrendous cancer and he died 21 months ago. I still feel so sad and broken by his death. You have experienced the death of an Adult child and this is the very worst experience a mother can go through. I am surprised that counselling did not work for you. Firstly you have to shop around for the right counsellor till you get the right one. You would know how well they work with you and the skills they use whether they were the right one. Many people leave counselling too early before they feel the benefit as healing even from counselling takes time. I had the best counselling ever from a psychologist. Very expensive but the best investment I made. I would pay anything to feel the way I do now. I had my counselling some years before I lost my husband and this has helped me cope better. I learned skills I use now to cope. BUT saying this even counsellors and psychologists/psychiatrists are human and lose people from their life and are human and face the same grief as we do and have to go through the motions of grief. Just reading the book of Scott M. Peck shows his vulnerability, and his struggles to cope with life and his trials. The skills used in this field are exceptional and one should see results. I was cynical, in a lot of emotional pain, and lost all hope that I would feel better and counselling would work. I woke up one day and felt amazing like I had never felt before and this was the turning point of the start of the healing process. I could never go back to feeling that pain again. I feel WHOLE. I still go through the grieving process. I wish you could have this experience. You need to grieve now rather than later because grief stored is worse later on and will press for resolution. It will be more painful. Grief can't be forced. You may need professional help to start. You may be stuck in grief, or have frozen grief where you feel so numb you can't cry. Grief counselling would work and start the process. Many people find the process of counselling so painful they walk away before feeling the benefits. And for other's it just doesn't work perhaps because of the expectations not met. I am sorry for your loss of your son and also you difficulties coping with your mother who is so ill. I hope you get the right support and able to feel some relief from your grief. Please write back with an update.

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