I miss

I don't know if this sounds really stupid. I miss everything about the us of our relationship. My husband died six months ago. I miss holding hands, I miss our times together. I miss the sex. We had such good sex. I miss it all but one thing I miss is being his little girl. I knew he would take care of me. If we went on our road trips I never worried I knew he would handle everything. I could curl up in his strong arms and let him take control. BUT NOW!!!!
I have to do it all. Pay the bills, water the lawn, shop, work , cook, dishes-There is no one to take care of me. Does this sound selfish? I don't mean to be-but it is so hard doing it all!! I miss him so much MY big strong wonderful husband.

Comments for I miss

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Feb 06, 2011
I miss mine too.
by: Julie

I just lost my husband a week ago to a massive heart attack. Overnight I was forced to grow up. We have a successful Internet business and he ran the technical side. I did all the customer service. I had to step in right away and take over. I was on the phone the day of the loss dealing with clients. I'm overwhelmed with the company and dealing with my grief. Some days I feel like I'm going to lose it and can't handle all this and others I feel like superwoman.

I miss him so much. We have been best friends since I was 16 years old. He was 11 years older than me and every time I looked at him I thought "when I grow up I want to marry someone just like him". Well what a surprise that it was him. I loved him with all my heart and feel so alone now.

The memorial service is this Friday and I have to see clients and be strong so they don't think the company will close. It is very hard putting up strong front when all I want to do is break down.

I know I have to grieve. But how and when?

Jan 31, 2011
I miss
by: Pam

I know exactly what you mean, I miss the "us" too. I say I don't want to be a ME, I want to be a WE, but it won't be like that anymore. All we can do is put one foot in front of the other and attempt to do things on our own. I just accomplished something on my own today, something I tried last week and was not very successful at, and it felt good to do it today. I can hear my husband yelling to me what to do, since it has to do with auto repair, something I know nothing about.
I'm just trying smaller things, nothing major, so I don't get too discouraged. My husband died November 19th, so its only been 9 weeks. I remember six weeks ago I was unable to even go to the grocery store without crying, so I think I am moving in the right direction. Just start small and I think it will get easier.
Just keep coming on here and read what others right, seems to make me feel better knowing we are not alone in this horrible journey.

Jan 31, 2011
I miss him too...Still
by:

You do not sound stupid, you sound like me and most of the people here. Regardless of how independent we may have been. There was/is nothing like feeling that you can rely on your honey to help you with things. Being a team. To talk to him at the end of the day. The simple things that we were able to do with them and miss so damn much.

Things get easier with time. It does not cure grief just puts it in it's place so that you can start to live and depend more on yourself. While going through the transformation of we to me. Expect alot of fussing/talking to yourself though... It isn't easy or fair. Who said life was?
HH

Jan 31, 2011
I miss
by: Donna

Their are so many things that I also miss about "us". His soft warm kisses, his warm loving hugs, making love (the unbelievable sex), holding hands, watching the sun rise or set, laying in bed just listening to each other breath, just so many things, to many things to post. When I miss these things the most I talk to Bryan and ask him to help me take this one step one breath (one second sometimes) one day at a time. Then I come here to either read or post. It helps a lot.

Jan 31, 2011
I miss
by: Mari

I am very sorry for your loss. It is a difficult time for you. It sounds as if you had a wonderful husband.
The grieving process is something we have to go through and it takes time.It seems to vary with everyone but six months is not a very long time.
You need support and people who care for you at this time.
There are a lot of wonderful people on this board who care and are here for you.
The Bible says that to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. Your husband is safe with the Lord.
One of the things we find out besides missing our husbands all the time is what you were saying. You have to do everything yourself now. I am learning after an extremely difficult year. 2010 was the worst. My husband passed away 14 months ago. I have paid the bills, taken care of everything here. The house seems too big for me and I am lonely esp at night when it is quiet.
Take care of yourself and stay close to the Lord. Actually being busy is best and it helps me.I too miss the love and affection. It is not easy to go through a loss like this.
You are not alone. You have the Lord and we are here when you want to express your feelings. God bless you.

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