I Thought it Would Last Forever-3
by Hannah
(Arkansas)
Josh & I at a Ranger's baseball game last summer
Josh and I had been together for 3 1/2 years. We were planning on getting married & having children together. He was 19; I 18. We were both attending college when he died on October 29, 2009. He had a late class that night on another campus, so I was just waiting in my dorm for him to get back. He was out of class, and we were texting. The last text he sent me was "It's raining so hard." Right then I should have called him, told him to buckle up, slow down, pull over, something!! But, I didn't.
About 30 minutes later I asked when he was going to come over....no response. I called....no answer. I sat straight up in bed, and started crying! Something came over me, and I knew something wasn't right. My roommate and best friend, Sarah, was trying to calm me down, but it wasn't working.
My mom didn't want me out in the weather looking for him, but that didn't stop me. One of Josh's friends, Jason, Sarah, (the driver of the vehicle girl friend) Amanda, and myself all got in Jason's truck to look for them. It seemed like we were driving down the interstate for hours, but in reality it had only been about 20 minutes.
My mom was trying to contact police, hospitals, anyone to find out if there had been a wreck with 3 boys involved, and she wasn't getting anywhere.
I was too scared to call Josh's mom, Carla, but I knew I had to. I called Carla, and told her what was going on. She sounded so calm, but I knew she wasn't.
We finally found out that there had been a wreck with 3 boys, and a white ford truck. Panic began to settle in! We found the hospital that all 3 boys were "supposed" to be in. As we were pulling into the parking lot, my phone rang.
It was Josh's dad, Bruce.
Me: Hello
Bruce(crying): I'm sorry baby, he didn't make it.
I dropped the phone screaming NOOOOO, noooo!! I was frantically trying to get out of the truck. I ran into the hospital bawling, and asking the nurses where he was! All they could say was, "If you're going to be loud, then you need to step out." I couldn't believe what I was hearing! So, I sat outside in the pouring rain...numb to everything.
My phone was going off like crazy! How could everyone know about this so soon?! I needed to get home, but the roads were blocked from flooding and my mom couldn't get to me. My aunt lived near by, and she finally arrived to take me away.
We were driving, and I was just staring out into the distance. I have heart disease, and they insisted on taking me to the hospital. When, I got to a different hospital my mom, step dad, and brother were there. I went into the hospital, and they gave me medicine to put me to sleep.
That was the night my whole world stopped. Now, nothing matters, I don't care about anything, and I just want all of it to go away. How is anyone supposed to move on from this?!
