I want you here
My Dad was taken from me over the weekend in a tragic accident at the Jersey shore. He was swept out into the ocean while walking along with his buddy and their 7 year old daughters while on vacation there together with all of their families. My parents divorced when I was young, I have a 26 year old brother while I myself am 32. He remarried and had two more children with my stepmom and they have a 11 year old son and a 7 year old daughter. So my brother and I were back home while he and his family were on vacation. They were walking in knee high water and took a step out into nothingness and were suddenly in water up to their necks. The current was so strong that it pulled my dad and sister out so quick while his friend and his daughter were able to fight their way back to shore. My dads last effort was to push my sister away from him into calmer water because he knew the current would take both of them if he held onto her. She was shortly picked up by someone on a personal watercraft but as soon as they got her, they looked and he was gone. It took 2 days for him to resurface and come ashore. My father and I couldn't have been closer. He had me at a young age but was always there. He worked so hard for his family, he was so dedicated to his work and built his mechanic business up from the bottom. He worked with my brother in the shop. I don't know what to do, I am lost and angry and beside myself with pain, and I still have to get through the funeral. I am scared to go to sleep because the mornings are the hardest time because i have to wake up and realize this is really happening. I am just waiting for him to come back from vacation. I can't understand why he was taken from me, from us. I want him with me so much, I want him to come through to me, I need my father. We had such a fun relationship, always joking with each other, busting each other up. He was respected and loved by so many people. We knew he knew a lot of people but over the last 3 days, we are seeing the overwhelming support and respect he had of our community. He is a man that is going to be missed by more people then I can imagine. I feel my dad and I had a special connection and he always made me feel so special and so loved. I cannot stress enough through words how awesome he was, it just doesn't sum it up. Words are just not enough. I will miss my dad and think of him every single day. I really hope that there is a afterlife and that he is with me and comes through because I don't know what to think right now about death and the afterlife. I am so confused and scared and lonely.